Not Much Between Dispair And Ecstasy
by ani
Summary: With Piccolo's death, Gohan thought he'd lost his last ally... but he finds a new friend, Tien's long lost daughter. *A Mirailine what if.*
1. No Hiding From the Truth

Not Much Between Despair and Ecstasy  
By: ani

Disclaimer: it's Toriyama-sensei's universe, I'm only playing in it. )

Chapter 1- No Hiding From the Truth 

AN: This tale is your basic what-if set in the mirai timeline. (Simply because I like what the great Toriyama did with Gohan in that line better.) The tale has a lot of the same stuff, but about the only thing that stays the same chronologically is the first and, within my story the third, time trips.

* * *

She was out gathering more plants for her herbal medicines when she felt it: a slowly dying ki and a barely formed one about twenty feet away. She ran through the forest, preparing herself for whatever the situation could be. Nothing could have prepared her for what she found.

A green skinned, bald man on his hands and knee;(his right leg was gone) badly injured, spitting out a large green-gray egg that rolled to a stop between them. The man suddenly fell to the ground and before she knew it, she was rolling him over.

"Just hold still sir. I cant heal all this completely..." she started.

A taloned green hand suddenly grabbed hers, "You can heal..." he coughed, "…strong ki too, knows how to hide, good. Take the kid." Her mind was suddenly bombarded with proper care and knowledge of the egg. "Take it and go." He tried to order.

She went to the egg, bringing it back to him. She ripped what was left of his cape off, and then turning to her deep gathering basket, buried the egg and cape within her pickings.

She suddenly felt another ki approaching so she quickly masked the eggs as she heard him say, "Don't tell him."

She turned just in time to see a tall muscular young man land at the green mans other side. He was in better condition, but she could tell he was fighting to stay conscious. She turned back to her first patient, "If youll just stay still, I can..."

He swatted her hands away and turned to the other, "This is it kid, they finally got me."

"No Piccolo let her fix you."

"Too late kid, it wont be enough. Its just you and Vegeta's brat now. I know you guys can defeat these two." He paused, the two staring into each others eyes. She could sense all the memories and emotions passing between them, the green mans form started disappearing as he spoke again, "Gohan, don't avenge me, thats a suckers game I tried to play. It wont help. Train the kid, you two together can do it," his form as barely there, "Remember I'm proud of you Gohan… my son." And he disappeared.

She sat there, staring at the now vacant place where the green one, Piccolo, was lying. A sound somewhere between pent-in rage and choked-on sobs made her look at the young man. His pain and anger was so clear on his face as he levered himself up. One good look at his left leg showed why, a long gapping cut ran from mid-thigh to inches above his ankle. She hopped to her feet as he attempted to bow to her, "Thank you for your offer. If it would have..." he spaced out, turning to leave the same way he came.

She reached for him, trying to stop him, "Wait, at least let me..." she didn't get to finish, he fell forward, unconscious. She quickly rolled him over, checking for any worse injuries before turning to his leg. She practically ripped off his pant leg, trying to clear the area. She opened her canteen and slowly washed it, making sure there was no debris. She quickly sat the canteen aside, and placing her hands over the worst points of the cut, allowed her healing abilities it work, her hands taking on a strange green glow that expanded to his whole leg.

Her patient suddenly grunted in pain as she realized he was healing faster than he should, _So he's not completely human either,_ she thought as she finished, leaving nothing but a few light scratches under her hands. He slowly opened his eyes, and she almost smiled, realizing how handsome he was.

"Wha-what happened?" he groggily asked.

"Your body decided it had to rest, whether you like it or not." She replied, wiping her hands on her jeans.

"What was that strange sensation?" he asked, curling his legs under himself to get up.

"Just fixing your leg, Halfling." She answered, rising as well.

"Wha..." He responded as he rose, watching his leg and the injury that should be there. "I... I can't believe it. Wait a sec, how do you know I'm half human?"

"For one thing, you heal too fast."

"My father was a Saiyajin." He answered in a low whisper.

"That…?" she asked.

"No, Piccolo wasn't my real father. But I always considered him one." He whispered in reverence. "He was there for me when my father died."

"Lucky dog, getting another after you loose the first." she mumbled, turning away.

Unfortunately, he heard, "You've lost yours too?" he half-asked, half-stated.

She nodded slowly, "Considering I hardly knew him, it shouldn't hurt as much, but it does," she paused, "Hes the one I got the healing from."

Gohan moved closer, tempted to console her, "What was he? What was his name? Umm..." he paused, his left hand moving behind his head, "and umm...whats yours?" he asked, embarrassed.

"Its Zandre, um.. Gohan?" he nodded, "My father had no knowledge of where he was from. But the monks told us he was from space: him and his little companion. He had a third eye is the middle of his forehead. His name was..." she paused, trying to steady her voice.

"Tienshinhan," Gohan muttered in amazement, "Tien had a daughter! The others would have been amazed."

"None were to know. No one was." She mumbled, tears starting to fall.

Gohan was so tempted to push her to tell more, but he also knew how that pain feels and how you've got to work through it yourself. His hands slowly went out, turning her around and he was amazed at how beautiful she was. He shook the inappropriate admiration and asked, "Would you like to visit his grave Zandre?"

She looked up into eyes full of a similar pain and understanding. She nodded as she wiped her tears, his right hand helping out. He moved in extremely close, about to wrap his arms around her, when she suddenly remembered the egg. "Wait I have to get my things," she stated, quickly pulling away and going to the basket.

Zandre almost laughed at the look on his face as she returned. Gohan had turned to pick up the canteen and took a drink without thinking. "What is that stuff?" he said wiping off his tongue. She stifled the laughs and said, "Its rubbing alcohol. Being the closest thing to a doctor out here, I have to stay prepared for anything."

He sobered quickly, "So what's that for?" he shook it off, nodding at the basket.

"Medicines, I come out her weekly," she replied, stuffing her jacket in on top and around it and the egg. She stood, taking the straps and putting them on her back, "Is it very far?"

He gave her the canteen, moving in just as close as before, "Not really, but its easier to get there if we fly. Can you?"

She only shook her head, repressing the truth as she felt his big muscular arms wrap around her waist, just under the basket, "I've got to go slow, that battle wore me down," he mumbled to her as they slowly started rising.

Zandre looked up into his face, "That's okay," and slowly wrapped her arms around his neck. She felt him tighten up little, watching her as they slowly rose above the tree line. She turned to place her cheek against his chest, catching a slight blush creep into his cheeks from the corner of her eye.

He slowly took off, staying above the forests, moving to the east, along the mountains. _He was trying to..._ she realized, the tears getting ready to pour forth. She turned her face against his chest, could feel him stiffen more, but his hold on her became more gentle, more caring. They soon landed in a tiny little clearing; two stones and a giant willow tree the only occupants. Zandre slowly pulled away, turning around and falling to her knees.

"He took them both on while Chaotzu and I tried to get the people out. He was pretty badly beaten when we joined in, but he kept it up, just as hard and true. No one realized how bad he was until they left and he flew away. He could barely stay airborne. Chaotzu helped, I followed." Gohan started explaining how.

"They landed here, Tien rolled onto his back and told Chaotzu to look out for them, then said good-bye and died. Chaotzu joined him about a week afterward. That was about..." Gohan paused, the pain playing with his memory.

"About fourteen years ago. Mama and I were out in some recently rampaged town, trying to find any survivors, scavenging what we needed when I felt it. I could tell he was... Then we heard it, he called out to us. Mama ran in the direction it came from, right under a collapsing building." She finished. "I just sat there and cried, knowing I lost both parents, when I remembered something he'd told me once. 'If anything happens to me, go to the Capsule Corporation Headquarters. Ive got friends there who can help.' So I raided the Capsule Corp. warehouse there, getting the whole place down to twenty packets I kept in my backpack and came here, staying in the forest." She added, tears silently falling down her cheeks.

"Why didn't you come to us?" Gohan asked, confused.

"I can't fight. I found I could help more healing people, so I set up shop and have been living out here for thirteen years." She paused, looking back and forth between the two stones, "If there's one thing they taught me, it's do whatever you can to help others." She stopped as her sobs broke free. Gohan knelt in front of her, placing his hands on her shoulders. Zandre looked up into eyes that told her they understood her pain, and before she knew it, she was clinging to Gohan for dear life. He held on in return, showing her there was someone who knew, who wanted to help her through.

She slowly pulled away as she stopped, realizing she was desperately clinging to a near-complete stranger. She tried to pull herself together, watching as he hesitantly wiped her tears away. He rose, slowly helping her up and asked, "Exactly where do you live?"

"Answer me first, have you noticed the red light up in the mountains?" she asked sheepishly.

"Yeah, its said that the healer has it on when she'll..." he paused, taking a serious look at her, "That's you!" he said shocked.

She giggled, "You sound surprised."

"Well, I thought she'd be older and..." he stopped himself, blushing.

"And what?" she pressed.

His gaze fell, "I never thought she'd be so beautiful." He replied, turning beet-red.

"Why thank you," she replied, a slight flush in her cheeks, "Just head in that direction, you'll probably see it flying in from here."

He slowly picked her up, flying low but a little faster. After a few minutes she heard him yell over the wind, "Is that it?"

_Yes_ she replied mentally, shaking him a little.

They landed on the edge of a short wide cliff, a medium-sized capsule house about fifty yards from the edge, partially hidden in the forest. They pulled apart and just stood there. She slowly removed her basket from her back and turned to the house.

"I should get going. Mom, Bulma, and Trunks are all probably paranoid by now." he half-stated.

She turned to him, then what's left of the city, "Your mother is, the others realize you're okay."

He stared, "You really are..."

She nodded, "Another gift from Papa," she paused, hefting the basket, "This was from Mama."

"Listen, I want to thank you for everything you've done or couldn't today." he said, a hand floating to her shoulder.

Zandre smiled weakly, "It's what I do, and don't ever hesitate about coming again. You're welcome anyway," she paused, "Anyway, I should thank you for giving me what you did."

Gohans hand slid from her shoulder to her arm, "I know what that pain feels like, I'm only glad I could help you with it. You're also welcome." he turned to leave, slowly floating away.

"Until next time." He couldn't bring himself to say good-bye.

"See you then." She replied, watching him fly toward the city.

It made her remember... _I miss you Papa._ She sent the thought to him, wherever he was. She started to the house, trying to figure out how to incubate the egg.

* * *

Just a note before you ask: Zandre's mother is not Lunch!!!! I didn't find out what had happened to her until after I'd stared this!!!!! (meaning I haven't seen/read Dragonball) 


	2. Til the Fear In Me Subsides

Not Much Between Despair and Ecstasy  
Ch. 2 Til the Fear in Me Subsides  
By: ani

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made.

* * *

_Ive got to get to her. She can help better than anyone. Where was it?_ Gohan thought, loosing control and crashing through some bushes. _Zandre, where are you? She said she usually comes out weekly I havent see her yet this week. Where is she? _his mind rambled, the pain slowly taking control. He crawled out of the bushes, slipping and falling on his face. He slowly turned toward the only ki he sensed, exerting his last bit of control: screaming mentally, barely a whisper physically, "Zandre."

She was really upset. She had to admit it was nice to see him again, she only wished it wasnt in this condition. His left shoulder had been dislocated and the muscles severely bruised. His right arm was broken in three places, his left leg in four. His right knee was seriously sprained and twisted. He had a concussion. He was covered in minor cuts, bruises and burns. And three ribs were broken, with some slight internal bleeding.

That wasnt the worst; he had a temperature of 120°. He was shivering and sweating. She couldnt do a thing until that fever broke or hed never get back to his old self. She didnt know if hed make it. The teakettle whistling made her push her fear aside, concentrating on breaking his fever. She took the kettle and medicine back to the spare room shed set him up in. She set it all on the nightstand and sat on the edge of the bed. She had done what she could for his injuries already, but she knew he needed a lot more.

She felt her hand on her face, mimicking the scars on his. She slowly reached out, tracing his scars then the lines of his face. _I guess hes been through a lot since we met. But they do seem to make him more handsome.'_ She jumped a little as she realized he was reacting, leaning into her caresses. She forced herself to stop daydreaming and try waking him; he didnt have the time for her fantasies. She took his face in her hands and shook him, calling his name, "Gohan, Gohan."

He slowly groaned, forcing his eyes open, "Uuhh...Z-Zandre, thank Kami I found you. Can you help me?"

She leaned over him, holding his head up and pressed the tea to his lips, "Drink this. I cant do anything until this fever breaks or youll never get completely healed." She said, amazed when he drank it all in one gulp.

"So this is what being sick feels like," he mumbled, a weak smile crossing his face.

"Youve never been sick, great! No, wait. Gohan, have you ever found out how fast you do heal?" she asked, her professional side prevailing.

"Bulma says its twice as fast as humans." he said around a yawn.

"Well then... it should take a day or two for this fever. That should be safe enough," she muttered, thinking through his condition and his needs. She turned back to him, only to smile at his sleeping face. She pulled the covers up around his neck and left the room.

She had just shown her last patient out and was about to clean up, when she could hear him almost yelling. She rushed in to find him still asleep, thrashing wildly. _Ive got to wake him before he makes his injuries worse.'_ She thought trying to hold him still and forcing her presence on him as she called his name. "Gohan, come on! Wake up Gohan!"

"No!!!" he suddenly screamed, eyes snapping open as he bolted upright. Zandre just happened to be prepared, holding the pan as he got reacquainted with his lunch. As he stopped, she put the pan aside and helped to slowly lay him back down, groans and grunts escaping all the way.

"I dont suppose youll tell me what that was about?" she asked.

Gohan just laid there, eyes closed, trying to control himself, so she took the pan and left to prepare supper.

He made it through the night until around eleven oclock. She just finished getting ready for bed when she heard him muttering. She rushed in to hear him yelling for someone named Krillin, watching tears roll down his cheeks. His hands slowly started to glow; she risked her secret, trying what she could to push his ki level down. She was at his side in seconds, shaking him as much as she should, "Gohan wake up. Its too late. Gohan, Gohan."

Zandre felt his ki lowering itself, watching as he turned away, eyes and jaw clenching tight. She walked around the bed and sat on the empty side, watching his tensed face failing to hold back his pain. "Gohan, you cant hold in all this guilt. It wasnt your fault your friend died."

He slowly shook his head, "No, if I could have gotten there sooner..."

She reached out, gently placing her hand on his sore shoulder, "Gohan, those if I coulds will only drive you crazy. I kept if-ing myself for years; if only I stopped my mother, made her stay with me. It wasnt until Id prevented almost the same thing for someone else that I realized its useless. Someone told me after that to think about her and if shed approve of what Id been doing. Gohan, do you think your friends would want you to carry all this guilt with you?"

His face was full of guilt and confusion. "I know what youre saying and they wouldnt, but..."

"No buts Gohan, if they dont blame you, how can you blame yourself? If youve got to blame anything, blame the Jinzouninjin. Theyre the ones who took them from us." she replied.

Gohan slowly nodded, "I know, I know, but I keep reliving it all in my dreams."

"I could sit with you, read to you, or something to help." Zandre offered.

"If it isnt a problem... will you read that?" he said, pointing at a book sitting on the nightstand.

She reached over, picking it up, "Sure. Another payment huh? Wow, one I havent read."

"Another payment?" he asked.

"Its kind of a long story. The short of it is I somewhat teach the children around here by letting them read any book Ive collected. The people know Im a bookworm, so when they feel compelled to pay, its usually with necessities or books." He nodded as she settled in next to him. She read aloud until both were asleep.

She was woken up by a vise-like grip on her hand slowly getting too tight. Gohan held her hand in a death grip as another nightmare started. She moved as close to his head as she could, whispering, "Gohan listen to me, this is your dream, youve got total control over it. Do whatever you want. Stop them; destroy them. Anything. Take control."

"Control" he mumbled, his grip relaxing enough to let her feel her fingers.

"Yes, control, do what you want to. Take all this anger and guilt out on them. Youve got the power, do it. " She whispered, wishing she could help him do it for real.

He let out a wicked little laugh, surprising her. She could barely understand his mumbled conversation, making out Piccolo, Vegeta, Daddy, and Tien. She wondered what they were talking about, if he was telling about her; wishing she could cut in and talk to him. A sudden mention of Bulma, Trunks and Mom made her realize where his dream was turning, so she stopped paying attention and tried to go back to sleep.

Gohan slowly pulled himself out of his dream, wanting to tell her it helped. He turned to find her head inches from his, lost in sleep, a single tear resting on her nose. He let go of her hand, wiped the tear away, gently stroking her cheek, and whispered, "Hes proud of you Zandre. They all are."

He took her hand again and turned away, falling asleep fast. He didnt see her smile, her lower lip trembling.

The next two days went by smoothly. The nightmares stopped, but she still found herself sleeping in the bed with him those nights. The fever broke the second afternoon; and when he found out her healing ability worked a lot like his ki, weakens when used too much, Gohan only let her heal his broken ribs and the internal bleeding.

Zandre was thoroughly amazed every time she checked him out. Gohan was healing as fast as hed said. She began taking notes on his condition, realizing hed probably be making a lot of visits to her. He was so happy when she let him out of bed after only two weeks, a week early by her terms.

She had set him up in a chair in the living room; as soon as shed finished, her daily flow of patients started coming. Gohan kept those who had to wait entertained, a good portion of the time telling tales of his father or of his own fights with the Jinzouninjin. Zandre came to get her last patient and got a nice little surprise. A five-year-old little boy was sitting in Gohans lap, his mother standing between her and the little scene.

"He's been running a really high temperature, he won't do anything, and he won't tell us what's wrong," his mother said, turning to Zandre.

Gohan just looked the little guy in the eyes, "You're not feeling well, huh? You know you've got to tell Zandre what's wrong or she can't fix you right?"

He only nodded.

"You're probably scared she'll hurt you, or worse, that the medicine will taste yucky."

Another nod.

"She took care of me and it didn't hurt. You know what, I've been sitting here all day and the only time anyone said it hurt was when they wouldn't tell her what was wrong. You know what else?"

He shook his head.

"If you tell Zandre you're Gohan's friend, she'll give you her secret ingredient that makes the medicine yummy, okay."

"Okay," he mumbled, shaking Gohan's good hand.

She shook her admiration and walked over to them, "So Gohan, I see you're making some new friends. Let's go in the next room and we can find out what's wrong," she said as she took the little boy from Gohan's lap.

After she'd taken care of Gohan's new friend, sending him home with medicine and her secret ingredient, Zandre helped Gohan into the kitchen, setting him up at the table to help with what he could. As soon as she turned away, she went to a portable stereo on the counter, starting a tape. The music was somewhat old, but then... He sat back and watched as she unconsciously sung along with them, sometimes stopping what she was doing, some even stopping singing.

When supper was ready, she turned it off and joined him for the meal and their usual conversation: comparing childhoods. They found many similar aspects; mothers that pushed studies, fathers that loved to fight, large parts of childhood without fathers, and that amazingly strong bond with fathers.

As supper finished, she absently picked up the dishes and went about washing them. The tape was immediately turned on and Gohan sat back, noticing the same patterns again. Shed just gotten done drying as he asked, "Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"You sing along with most of them, some thats all youll do. The ones you dont sing with youll stop whatever youre doing. Why?" he tried to phrase it.

She stopped, turning to face him; "I had little contact with the world outside of the monastery growing up. So, when Mama and I left, I found out about a lot of things, like music. As I grew up, I hoarded it like crazy, finding songs I like, ones that fit my life and ones that fit what I wanted in my life, my future. Those are the ones I stop doing everything for. I sing along with the ones I like, and I only sing with the ones that..." she stopped, getting lost in the memories.

"That fit how your life has been. I can see why," he finished, a strange melancholy falling over both.

"Why do you ask? Was I that bad?" she asked, trying to lighten the mood.

"No, no, not at all. You were great. I guess its just curiosity," he replied, a slight blush on his face, "You left the monastery with your mother, why?" he asked, trying to change the subject.

Zandre put the last dish away, and then turning to him said, "That was so long ago. It really started when I was four. Papa and Chaotzu got a visitor who left really fast. They spent some time with the monks, then Papa came into the little house Mama and I had. Papa told us they had to go away and train for a year because some evil aliens were coming. Mama immediately got worried about it; I just asked it they were like Papa. He said they werent and that there would be others fighting with him so we had nothing to worry about."

"I was told to got to my room because Mama and Papa needed to be alone. I sat in my room and listened to Mama cry and Papa consoling her. It stopped after a while and he came in my room. He put me in his lap and told me to keep an eye on Mama so she doesnt worry herself sick, keep up my studies, and keep tabs on him and Chaotzu with my mind. We sat there in quiet for a while, holding each other, then he turned my head so we looked each other in the eye and he mentally said, _I dont want to worry your Mama, so Im telling you this way. If anything happens to us, go to the Capsule Corporation Headquarters. Ive got friends there who can help. Okay?' _I asked him if he wasnt coming back and all hed say was, well see. He hugged me and for the first time said, I love you Zandre. And they left." she said, sitting at the table.

"We made it through the year, Id check on them every day, not knowing if I should tell Mama or not. Then the fight came. Mama already knew when I found her. She decided that night we had to leave; she couldnt stay where everything reminded her of him. I told her what hed said, but she didnt want to, theyd been hiding the truth for too long. So we lived in the East Capital until the Jinzouninjin appeared, then she thought we should come here." she stopped, a few tears falling softly.

Gohan took her hand in his left, "And thats how she died, coming here," he paused, watching her nod, "Not to pry or anything, but didnt you feel it when they came back?"

Zandre nodded, "Yes, but she wouldnt believe me, she thought it was my imagination or the trauma of it. As I got older, Id try to touch his mind, anything to let him know... but he was always out of reach," she said, the tears falling a little faster.

Gohan realized when to stop, she wouldnt tell much more. He started shifting in his chair, trying to get up, "Im real tired, how bout we call it a night?" he asked watching her.

She looked up at him with a small smile.

The third week went by amazingly fast. Zandre took his casts off at the end of the week, again sooner than expected. Gohan immediately started some simple training moves after regaining movement in both limbs. "Why dont you go out back and do some really light exercises?" Zandre suggested as her first patient showed up, "Itll give you more room."

"Okay," he replied, heading out the back door as she went to the front.

It was an amazingly beautiful and slow day, so Zandre had many opportunities to check on Gohan, even going out to watch him three times. He effortlessly and fluently completed many moves shed seen her father do, had even done a few herself. The feelings it evoked and someone showing up gave her a reason to go in, to stop.

It was when shed catch sight of him through a window that troubled her. Gohan would be in the middle of a punch or jab and stop, grabbing his right elbow. Some hed be stopped, head back, eyes closed. So, she called him in before lunch was ready.

"Any problems?" she asked, turning back to fixing the meal, hoping hed tell her.

"Just going a little too far," he said, holding his right elbow and flexing his arm.

"Just?" she said, turning to him.

He blushed slightly, "Okay, every time I move my arm fast, it feels like something is scratching the muscle on the inside," he replied to her scrutiny. She got a serious look in her blue-green eyes that, for a second, reminded Gohan of Bulma. Zandre took hold of his arm and closed her eyes. Her hands started glowing with a strange green energy, "Its not these two, theyre fine," she mumbled, her left hand sliding down to stop above his elbow, "Theres your problem. Its not quite healed; youve got a scratch thats in just the right spot. I could heal it now, but knowing how you heal, it should be gone by nightfall if youll stop the practicing."

He stood there, staring, so she turned to pull the meal together. She started getting the dishes together and asked, "Would you please stop staring and set the table?"

Gohan chuckled softly, and turning to the cupboard said, "Sorry, its just not something Im used to. Howd you find out you could do that?"

"Hmm," she thought as she placed the dishes on the table, "Thats just a matter of control. Its what I have to do before I heal anyone."

"When did you find out you could heal?" Gohan asked as they sat.

Zandre pulled her deep green hair over her shoulder, absently braiding it, "I always have. I dont remember when it started. Mama said the first time they saw it I was two. Papa had practiced a little too hard and cut himself on something. He came in to get it bandaged and Mama sat me in his lap to get them. I just put my hands on the cut and my hands started glowing. They sat there in shock as the glow moved around his arm. It stopped, I let go and the cut was gone," she said, tossing the braid over her shoulder.

"So as I grew up, we found out all that I could and couldnt do. Because I could heal, Mama thought I had to learn about the herbal medicines that she and the monks gave out, so she taught me about it. Thats part of the reason I stay up here and take care of any who need it." Zandre finished, reaching for the food.

Gohan nodded, his mind lost in his own problems. As they finished, she realized something was wrong; there were leftovers. She turned to him; "Gohan is there anything else wrong?"

He visibly shook himself, "No, just wondering why some of my exercises were too much for me," he paused, looking at her, "that, and I just realized Ive been here for almost a month and no one has come looking for me." he exclaimed, somewhat confused.

_Well, your ki was pretty weak when I brought you here, but Ive been hiding it since then, even as its gotten stronger and you started hiding it yourself._ she thought as she stood to clear the table. "No ones shown up asking about you. I dont know about it. As for the exercises, you arent completely healed yet. Youve got to give it at least one more day, okay. Just because I helped doesnt mean its finished."

He laughed, "Yeah, youre right," he got up, bringing most of the dishes to the sink, "Do you wanna wash or dry?" he asked, starting the water.

Gohan stayed with Zandre for another week. She couldnt understand it. He even helped out with everything, even learning a little about the medicines. He trained every chance he had, working harder and longer as the week rolled on. As Sunday evening rolled around, Zandre pulled him outside, stopping at the edge of the cliff.

"Gohan, dont take this the wrong way or anything, but dont you think its time to go home?" she asked, turning to look at the remnants of the city.

He stood in silence beside her; she smiled as he stopped hiding his ki and somewhat sent his mind out. She lowered her own masking of him, and sensing the shock from the others, almost laughed." I suppose I should, they are definitely worried." he said, turning to her.

"Youve got no choice now," she said, smiling at him.

"Zandre, thanks for everything. The healing, getting rid of the nightmares, my guilt, giving me a safe haven from everything." he said, his voice slowly getting softer.

She almost jumped, shocked and amazed at his remark, the truth in it. "It was an honor and a privilege to help one whos had a similar life. But then what are friends for, huh?" she paused, watching him smile, "Dont hesitate about coming back. But please, a few time when youre not hurt."

He laughed, "Deal. Thanks again Zandre-chan." he said hugging her.

"Just remember what I said," she whispered in his ear.

Gohan pulled away, smiling at her and started floating away, "Til next time."

"See you then, and please, no injuries." she replied.

He chuckled as he turned and headed home. She stayed there watching, smiling as another being popped up from the city, flying to meet Gohan. Zandre laughed as they circled, looped, and did other mid-air tricks as they headed for Gohans house.

Zandre got a strange little surprise in the morning. Shed just finished breakfast when someone knocked. She answered the door, only to find a few textbooks stacked on the doorstep. She knelt to pick them up, noticing a slip of paper poking out of the top book. She pulled it out and read:

_Just another payment.  
_

_Now you can really teach them,_

_if any will want to take one._

_Thanks again Zandre._

_You have no idea how much_

_that time together means to me._

_Maybe Ill explain it to you when I can visit._

_(Mom wont let me out of her sight.)_

_Until then_

_Gohan_

_P.S. Dont ruin the ending for me._

Zandre could only laugh.


	3. I've Learned How to Deal

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch 3 I've Learned How to Deal 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story…

***********************

It had been months since Gohan's stay with her, almost a year since they'd met. He popped by for short little visits, usually to heal something, but he did take the book the first time. There were other times too. He tried to hide it, but she always knew. Every time she'd go out to gather, she could feel his ki close by. She was so tempted to draw him out, but she somewhat peeked at his thoughts and realized that he was content to just watch, so she played along. So, she was surprised, almost four months after his stay, when he came to her as she was just coming home.

"Gohan, it's nice to see you. So what did you hurt now, or did you want another book?" she asked casually as they went in.

He sighed loudly, which startled her, "No, it's not that. I need you to come along, my grandfather's having back problems and we did all we could but it hasn't helped. That and Mom wants to meet the person I hid away with for a month," he said begrudgingly.

She turned to her backpack, grabbing some things she'd need, "It sounds like you don't want her to Gohan," she replied, a little confused. 

He turned away, staring at the floor. "I don't know what I want Zandre," he whispered.

She finished packing, and swinging it on her back, turned to him, "What's wrong Gohan?"

They just stared at each other awhile; Gohan trying to decide if he should tell, Zandre wanting to push but knowing he'd only clam up if she did. He pulled away, and heading outside said, "After I bring you back home, okay?"

"Whenever you want," she replied following.

He turned to her with a small smile, and wrapping his arms around her waist, started to hover. Zandre's arms slowly went around his neck, hugging him tightly as they started off. She felt him relax a little. She started watching where they were going, staying along the edge of the forest, going closer to the city, the end of the mountain range.

They landed about twenty yards from a little dome house, a garage and a shrine on each side. Gohan saw the yellow aircar parked near the well and said, "Should have known Mom would call Bulma when I said I was going after you."

"Is this good or bad?" she asked, discreetly hiding their presence.

"No, just be prepared for a lot of questions," he answered and she dropped her shielding, "Oh, I should warn you, my grandfather is a large man, so try not to be scared." he said, pulling her inside.

"ChiChi will you calm down? She's not coming to inspect your house." an older, slightly amused female voice said as Gohan lead Zandre to the living room. He stood there and, gesturing to each said, "Mom, Bulma, Trunks, this is Zandre."

She look at each in turn, the shock on their faces and said, "You never told them how old I am, did you Gohan?"

He flushed slightly as the women turned to him, "I knew I forgot something," he mumbled, smiling sheepishly.

Trunks turned back and forth from her to his mother and said, "You look a little like Mom."

Bulma studied her face, "Your face is a little softer than mine at that age, and of course the hair's off," she replied, pushing her sky blue ponytail over her shoulder.

"It's nice to see I won't change much as I get older than," Zandre said, watching as Bulma caught the veiled compliment.

Zandre turned to the forty-some dark-haired woman still staring at her. She saw a hundred emotions playing across ChiChi's face, unable to stay long. Zandre gently smiled and sent a caring presence across. "So where's the patient?" she asked, shaking ChiChi to reality.

"Just follow me," she replied, turning to go down the hallway. Zandre followed, as did the others. They all stopped in front of the door at the end, ChiChi knocked and called out, "Daddy, Gohan brought his healer friend to help you, so you better be in bed."

"Come in, come in. I want to meet the person who took care of my grandson," a deep, booming voice called from the other side.

ChiChi opened the door and everyone filed in. _'Gohan was right. He's got to be at least five feet across'_ Zandre thought, looking at the large gray-haired man. He was on his stomach in a bed that seemed too small, but could easily hold four average-sized people. She moved to the left side of the bed, by his face, bowed briefly and said, "If you don't already know, my name is Zandre. So what is the problem?"

"There are some sharp pains in about the middle of my back. I try to get up, but they shoot up into my head and I get so dizzy I pass out," he replied.

She blushed a little, "I've never had to say this before, but you must forgive me. I have to crawl on your back and work this out sir," she said, climbing on the edge of the bed.

"Please call me Ox-King, everyone does. And you are forgiven indeed. No one has arms that long," he said, trying to lighten her spirits.

She smiled briefly before crawling up his back. He was only wearing boxers, making it easier for both. She knelt at the small of his back, closing her eyes and allowing her hands to glow as she slowly massaged the middle of his back. She ignored the inhales, wows, and cool exclamations as she slowly moved up his back, "Could you put your arms straight above your head?" she asked.

"Not completely," Ox-King replied and she watched as his arms stopped about three-fourths of the way. "Gohan, Trunks, could you help?" she asked. Trunks shrugged as they both took an arm, pulling it into position. "Okay, that's enough," she replied still using her ability.

She suddenly stopped and pulling her backpack off, pulled out a large jar of some cream that she started working into his back. A couple of grunts and gratified groans coming out showing it helped. She stopped, wiping her hands off on a towel she had in her bag, and grabbing it and the jar, slid off his back to land on the right end of the bed, behind his head. "Let him go guys. Ox-King, you can get up whenever you want, but go slow okay."

Those tree trunk arms moved slowly on both sides of her, hands planting firmly on each corner. Zandre placed her bag and the jar on the floor, and turning and kneeling on the bed, helped him up until he was on his knees at the head of the bed. "So how do you feel?"

"Better than I have in years, thank you Zandre-san," he replied, pulling her into a tight hug.

"You're welcome," she choked out.

He chuckled as he released her. Zandre got off the bed and getting the jar, handed it to him, "It's nothing to worry about, just a muscle spasm in an arthritic area. Just have someone rub this in if it ever comes back."

She turned to her bag, pulling out a notebook and writing some things down. The others stared at her as Gohan gave his grandfather his clothes, offering to help and getting a happy, polite refusal. She looked up, staring blankly at the wall, mumbling, "I've been doing this for thirteen years and I can never remember the date."

Bulma pulled her eyes away and absently checked her watch, "It's the 16th."

"Thanks," Zandre replied, noting it and putting it back, pulling two small bags out. She turned back to Ox-King and said, "This tea is for the arthritis. Just one cup daily, two when it flares up. This," she paused, placing one in his hand, wiggling the other in front of his face, "is what your grandson called my secret ingredient. It's just fresh mint, but this has to be the only thing you add to the tea. Anything else would make your back worse or make you sick." She turned to the others, "I'll be in the living room. When you're coherent enough to ask the questions floating in your head, come and feel free to," she said, grabbing her bag and leaving, hearing Gohan trying to stifle his laughter.

They walked in to find her sitting at on end of the couch, head back, apparently asleep. Gohan moved through them and sat beside her, "Zandre, are you okay?" Her head popped up, eyes slowly opening, "Yeah, just had a late-night baby delivery and got very little sleep," she replied.

"How can you do that?"

"What can't you fix?"

"How did you get this?"

"Why was my baby with you for so long?"

As the questions poured out, Zandre slowly turned to Gohan. She saw a hint of regret creep into his eyes, instead of the earlier embarrassment returning. "You said none were to know," he told her, the truthfulness so clear. 

Zandre turned to the others, asking, "What did he tell you about that month?"

"Only that he spent the time with the healer in the mountains," Trunks replied, amazed with her.

Zandre nodded, eyes falling. She felt Gohan's left hand take hers and she held tight, each one supporting the other. "We had met once before, the day Piccolo died. I had healed a bad cut Gohan had got in the fight. When he asked about it, I told him I got the ability from my father. He and his little companion were aliens that didn't know of their origins. They lived in a monastery. My father was Tienshinhan."

Zandre paused, waiting for any outburst. When none came, she continued, "I explained that all I can do is heal and so I've been healing the people after I found out Papa was dead. I told him if he ever needed it again, that he knew where I was."

"That's why he sought you out again," Bulma deduced.

"But why'd it take four weeks?" ChiChi almost screamed.

"When I found Gohan, he was badly injured with a fever. My ability can't heal illnesses and if I healed him before he got over the fever, he'd never get back to his old self. Luckily, the fever broke by the second day, any longer and he probably wouldn't be here. After it broke, Gohan found out my healing ability works a lot like his ki and he would only let me heal the internal bleeding and broken ribs," she stopped, feeling Gohan tense beside her.

They looked up to see ChiChi fall to her knees, trying not to faint, "What did they do to him?" she asked, determined to stay coherent. 

Zandre could sense Gohan's doubt, but ChiChi's need and determination prevailed, "He had a concussion, his left shoulder was dislocated, his right arm was broken in three places, his left leg in four. His right knee was twisted; he had three broken ribs, was covered with cuts and bruises, and was bleeding internally. That's why it took a month. Ten breaks, muscles sprained everywhere, and bleeding inside and out. He only let me heal the worst."

ChiChi slowly nodded as her father helped her into the armchair. Once there she just spaced out, staring at the coffee table. They all sat in silence for a while, trying to accept what had been told and wondering how much more to tell.

"So how much can you do?" Bulma asked, pulling everyone out of their thoughts.

"The only things I've noticed so far is I can't heal illnesses and it weakens if I use it to much. The last time it did that was after Cherryhill was destroyed, thirty-six hours of healing with only about five hours of sleep. If I go short on sleep, it gets harder, takes more out of me," she replied, turning to Bulma.

"So sleep replenishes it," Bulma mumbled, gaining a nod, "But why did it take so long for you to show up? Tien would have told us about you sooner."

Zandre's gaze fell and turning away, replied, "He couldn't have. Papa and Chaotzu lived as if they were studying to become monks. Mama was an orphan raised by the monks, she lived like a housekeeper for them," she paused, trying to find the words, "There's no easy was to say this. I was the result of a deep friendship and my father's mating drive."

"You mean..."

"Yes. He was ready and my mother being the only female and a friend, they made me. That fact got hidden as quickly as it was established. There were three villages within walking distance and the monastery always had visitors. Because of how everyone saw them, my fatherhood was passed to a traveler who had spent a week at the monastery."

"But why?" Trunks cut in.

"If it was found out, the monastery would have been discredited and dishonored, so we hid it from everyone. I found out about it because my ESP was developing along with speaking. They explained as good as they could; but it was easy to accept, it explained my healing ability," she explained, wiping away a few silent tears.

Gohan picked it up, "She'd told me the first her parents knew of it she was two. Tien hurt himself practicing and went to her mother to get it bandaged. He had to hold Zandre as her mother got the bandages, so Zandre healed it." 

They turned to her, "Yes, and the reason he never told you is, after the fight with the Saiyajins, when he died, Mama and I left the monastery. I tried and tried to tell her Papa was alive again, but she wouldn't believe me. I tried contacting him, but he was always out of reach," she finished, more tears silently falling. Silence fell over everyone as all she'd told settled in. Zandre slowly pulled herself together, Gohan's hand never leaving hers. 

A voice quietly asked, "What happened to your mama?"

Zandre turned and weakly smiled at Trunks, "She died the same day Papa did. I remembered once he'd told me to go to the Capsule Corp. Headquarters and I'd get help from his friends. When I got here, I realized I could help more healing people and distributing the herbal medicines Mama taught me."

"So you've been doing that for thirteen years," Bulma finished.

Zandre could sense an uneasiness from Gohan, probably about the questions about to be asked about them. She honestly didn't know how to answer herself. That and she didn't know how long she could keep omitting parts she didn't want to tell. Using that, she innocently got up, grabbing her bag, "You'll have to excuse me, but I'm needed back home."

Gohan got up, still holding her hand as Bulma offered, "We can take you back."

"No, I'll do it. We need to talk anyway," Gohan said as they left the room, heading out the door.

"Thanks again Zandre-san," Ox-King called out the window.

"Anytime, all of you," she replied.

The others all stood at the window and watched as arms wrapped around bodies and the two flew away.

"And just what does that mean?" ChiChi almost yelled.

Ox shook his head, sighing, "I think it's nice to see Gohan getting close to someone. Maybe he'll stop fighting the Androids every chance he has."

"At least she can really take care of him," Trunks replied.

"You all know he's got so much on his shoulders..." Bulma started, turning away.

*********************

 They were halfway there when he tentatively asked mentally, _'There's no problem is there?'_

Zandre jumped a little at his use of telepathy, _'No there isn't, but I could tell where the conversation was heading and...' _she let it hang.

Gohan nodded briefly, his earlier mood returning. They continued on in silence. He landed on the edge of the cliff, his back to the city. He gently put her down, his eyes never looking at her. She slowly let go, her arms sliding down, hands resting on his elbows. "Gohan, what is it?"

He took her hands in his, "Zandre... I have no idea where this relationship is going. If my life was different, I'd willingly try to figure it out with you," Gohan stopped, not sure if he was wording it right.

Zandre pulled away, sitting down on the edge of the cliff. "You don't know if you want to pull me into the dangerous life you live. I realize you've got a lot on your shoulders Gohan and I don't want to..." she stopped, forcing back the tears.

He moved to stand behind her, so tempted to console her, take it all back, but... "Zandre, I hope you know this has nothing to do with you. I have to admit what you said is part of it, but there's more that I can't explain myself. I'm sorry Zandre, but..."

"You've got to speed up Trunks' training. I saw how he was looking at you. Trunks worships you and there are more important things than trying to figure out our relationship, if we even have one," she replied, barely pulling herself together, turning to him.

He slightly nodded, seeing the pain she was trying to hide. Gohan just stood there, trying to figure this out, more for her sake than his. He saw her moving, getting up and he fought the urge to help, knowing it would only...

"Well, if you guys ever need me, you know where I'm at," she said, not looking at him.

"Zandre, I... please..." he mumbled.

Her hand slowly covered his mouth, "Gohan, believe me I understand," she leaned in, going on tip-toe to kiss his cheek, "Please be careful. I want to figure this out," she said hugging him.

He slowly hugged back, tempted to... "I will Zandre. You be careful too," he replied.

She pulled away and slowly started to the house, "Please Gohan, come back," she said over her shoulder. _'I can't lose you too.'_

"I will," he replied, watching her as she went inside. _'I don't know what I'd do if I lost you.'_ He thought as he flew away.


	4. Just Holding Onto Ties

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch. 4 Just Holding Onto Ties 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story…

_'Gohan help me!'_

The whisper in his head was enough to distract him, letting Trunks get him to the ground. A worried look crossed his face as he hopped up.

"What's wrong Gohan?" Trunks asked.

Gohan turned to the boy that was somewhere between a son and a brother to him and said, "I don't know. Stay here and train, I'm gonna check this out."

"Is it...?" Trunks asked, concerned.

"No Trunks. I don't know what it is," he replied, turning and taking off to the north.

"Be safe Gohan," Trunks mumbled before going back to his training.

He landed on her cliff, a place he'd hardly visited for months. Her yells and sinister laughter from the house pulled him to the door in a split second. "Gohan!!!" she screamed from wherever she was.

"Shut up bitch!!! And stop fighting me!!!" Gohan heard someone say, then the sound of a fist hitting her head.

It fueled his anger, before he realized it; he was fighting seven men all at once. Gohan quickly knocked them out, throwing each out the door, over the cliff as far as he could. He moved through the house, going to the two ki's he sensed, one amazingly powerful, almost as high as his. _'Good, at least this one might be a challenge,'_ he thought as he found them in the bathroom. The attacker was standing over her limp form, trying to remove her blue jeans.

"Don't you DARE touch her!!!" Gohan growled through clenched teeth. Her attacker stood, just as tall and broad as Gohan, "What are you gonna do pretty boy, if I do?"

"This," Gohan screamed in rage, his hair going blonde as he charged, pushing the man through the wall, outside. They passed through a few trees before stopping at a giant rock. Gohan grabbed his shirt front, pulling him close and said, "If you EVER think of doing this again, we'll go through the mountain. Got that."

The thug nodded.

"Good," Gohan replied, punching him out and throwing him farther than his friends. Gohan was suddenly in the bathroom, kneeling at her side, checking her over. The green glow of her healing slowly encompassed her head. _'It must work on her when she's asleep.'_ Gohan thought as he picked her up, carrying her to her bed. He laid her out, covering her up when he realized it. _'That major ki is hers?!? But why would she hide it from me?' _ He thought, pushing Zandre's presence down, trying to focus on the situation when another ki popped up.

"What now?" Gohan asked aloud, moving through the mess her house was in, trying to find the source. He found it nestled behind the dryer and water heater.

She could feel herself being forced awake, some strange feeling telling her something was off. Zandre opened her eyes to find herself in bed, all her clothes intact. _'Thank Kami!'_ She turned to find Gohan sitting on the edge of the bed facing the wall. The feeling suddenly became clear.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked, his voice low.

"Because I sensed all the pressure and weights in your life and I didn't want to add to it. I'd been taught to hide it, flying, and a little self-defense. Papa thought I needed to learn to control it early. He promised me before they left that he'd teach me how to fight when they came back. I wasn't there when they finally did," she stopped, wiping a few tears away, rolling onto her left.

"When were you going to?" he asked, turning to her, his left hand resting on her knees.

"When you were done training Trunks. When we were going to figure out our relationship, I knew I couldn't hide it much longer. That, and I can't lie to you anymore, you deserve the truth Gohan," she replied, placing her hand next to his.

"What about this? Is it what I think it is?" he asked, nodding toward the floor. Zandre slowly propped herself up on her elbow, peeking over the edge then falling onto the bed.

She didn't look at him as she replied, "He didn't want you to know, not until little brother is old enough to start training. Piccolo tried to make him a healer and a fighter. He wasn't sure if it worked. I found him right as he spit him out. When Piccolo found out I'm a healer, he filled my head with what has to be done for the egg and told me to take it and go. When you approached, he told me not to tell you. After you brought me home and I was trying to figure out what to do with him, I suddenly realized he'd also given his reason why I had to hide him and what I was to do when he hatched."

She slowly sat up, steadying herself on his shoulder before reaching over the edge for the egg. Gohan stopped her, forcing her back and got the egg for her. Zandre sat him in her lap, her arms curling around him as she continued, "He knew of the weights being put on your shoulders as he died Gohan. Piccolo knew he made a healer that he tried to give a fighter's abilities. As I said, he wasn't sure it worked. Piccolo knew I could teach him how to use and control his abilities. I was going to tell you when he hatched, then I can tell if he's both. You're to start his training when he's four."

"Gohan, I realize this has got to be hard, but you've got to understand he did it this way because he cares. He knew how serious you'd take the responsibility and he didn't want to burden you with one more," she stopped, stroking the egg and turning to Gohan.

He just sat there staring into the basket she kept little brother in. He slowly bent over, pulling the heavy, course, mended white fabric out, fingering the stitches, "It's..." he couldn't say it all, the tears welling up.

"Yes, I took it and the egg and shoved it in my basket. He needs something of his true father's. I mended it that night, in case he'd ever want to wear it," she paused, pulling a long wide strip out of her pocket, placing it in his hand, "I thought you might need it too."

Gohan sat staring at it, his hand slowly curling tight, "I still remember..." his voice cracked, thick with emotion.

Zandre smiled, tears welling up in her eyes. She slowly laid down, curling on her left, her arms still around the egg, "I'm not quite healed yet, so little brother and I are gonna take a nap," she said, yawning.

"I noticed your healing works on you when you sleep," Gohan replied without thinking, "Why do you call him little brother?"

"It just made more sense. There's no way I could be his mother. I thought it would be a lot easier to explain as he got older too," she replied, slowly closing her eyes, "It fits better for you than me anyway," she mumbled as she fell asleep.

He had to admit they were right. He had the fate of the world resting on his shoulders. He didn't want to bring Trunks into it, but since the last fight, he knew he couldn't do it himself. But he was also running the risk of putting that burden of Trunks.

That was the real reason he didn't want to develop the feelings he was trying so hard to crush. He didn't want to put her through that pain, he could barely stand the fact he was going to put his mother through it some day. Gohan sighed, pushing it back and got up to clean some of the mess. He looked down, realizing he still held both parts of the cape in his hands. He tied the strip around his waist, and then slowly covered little brother with the cape. _'I hope I can make you proud.'_

Gohan was in the bathroom, almost finished fixing the wall, when he sensed Zandre walking by. He left his work behind and asked, "What are you doing up?"

"My stomach won't let me sleep," Zandre replied, glancing in the living room before going to her apothecary/dining room, "You didn't have to clean up," she added, a little wobbly on her feet.

"You should still be in bed. Besides, I kinda put a hole in the bathroom wall so I thought I might as well clean everything up. I couldn't do much in here though," he replied, sitting her at the table covered with leaves, roots, and flowers of every kind.

"I knew this was bad," she replied, reaching for some leaves, instead grabbing the table, "Maybe you're right, but I'm starved," her stomach rumbled in agreement.

Gohan turned away, looking at the clock, and then out the window, "It is past supper time. Why don't you go back to bed and I'll make something quick for us."

Zandre hung her head, taking a few deep breaths, "No, I'll be okay in a minute. I want to get started on this anyway," she said, leaning on her right as she started forming separate piles all across the table. Gohan nodded and went into the kitchen, preparing supper and occasionally glancing over the counter to find her still sitting there, sorting the mess. They ate slowly and quietly finished off the food. As he slowly stacked the dishes, Gohan asked, "So what happened Zandre?"

She just stared at the table, "I was out all night, a major farming accident and a baby to deliver. When I got back I knew there was trouble before I got in the door," she stopped as he went into the kitchen.

Gohan set the dishes in the sink and came back, kneeling on her right, "What was it?"

"I walked in to find a bunch of bandits sitting in the living room, one had a bullet wound to the shoulder. I was in no mood to argue, so I told him to follow me in here. He must have been the leader because they all came. I forced him to sit down and one of them almost slapped me. I healed his shoulder and told them to leave, but they had other ideas. I should have seen it coming Gohan. They circled me, pawing me, hitting and kicking me if I hit their hand away. The leader said something about using a gal like me in their camp. I panicked and hit him as hard as I could and suddenly all the others were on me. The leader came back, stopped them and told them to raid the place, that he was gonna teach me a lesson. I scrambled out, thinking I needed your help and he cornered me in the bathroom. I must have messed up his arm again cause he couldn't keep hold of me. Then I realized you were..." she paused, trying to hold in the tears.

Gohan gently placed his hand on her knee, a little reluctant as she flinched, but she placed hers over it. "He'd be so upset with me Gohan, that I let it happen, let them through, let him almost..." Zandre said the tears breaking free.

"No. No Zandre, he wouldn't, especially if Tien knew you and how your healing works. He'd understand, I know I do. It's not your fault," he said, turning her to him, "And remember it was almost."

She nodded slowly and curled up against him as Gohan wrapped his arms around her. They stayed that way for hours, until he realized she'd stopped crying and her healing glow slowly covered her back. He gently picked her up, carrying her back to her bed. Gohan knelt on the edge, placing her on her left side, putting little brother in her lap, pooling the cape around him.

Gohan sat on the floor, folding his arms on the edge of the bed, next to little brother. As the last tear rolled down her cheek, he reached out with his right hand, drying her tears. "I'm sorry this had to happen to you," he whispered, absently stroking her hair. A slight smile on her face made him relax, pulling his hand away, placing his left on top of the egg, "Sleep well little brother."

 She was being pulled awake; realizing she was in her own bed again, little brother in her lap, with Gohan sitting on the floor asleep, his head pillowed on his arm, his hand covering hers on top of little brother. Zandre reached out with her left, tousling his hair and whispered, "So now you get to take care of me," she paused, wiping away a single tear from his cheek, "If it's not my fault it's not yours either," she replied, her hand going through his hair again.

She didn't notice another tear fall as she went back into her healing sleep.

Zandre woke that morning to find Gohan gone, his blue shirt covering little brother.

_'I was beginning to wonder if you'd ever wake up.'_ His mind voice said jokingly.

_'Why..?'_ she replied, confused.

_'I thought he should have something of his brother's too,' _he replied somewhat solemnly, quickly shaking it, _'I finished the bathroom and cleaned up the kitchen before I left also.'_

_'You didn't...'_ she started.

_'I know, but I wanted to.'_

There was an awkward pause in the mental conversation, both knowing what had happened only complicated matters.

_'Trunks is waiting.'_

_'You know where I'm at if you ever...'_

_'I know and I will.' _


	5. The Honesty's Too Much

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch. 5 The Honesty's Too Much 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story…

It had to be a day they decided to take off. Zandre was amazed to find Bulma and Trunks knocking on her door. She put the textbooks aside, adjusted her sweatshirt and answered the door. Trunks had a few minor injuries that were at least half way healed but she gave in, only healing the worst one he had. Bulma, of course, started questioning her again, so she pulled out all the notes she had taken over the last thirteen years, which kept Bulma occupied for a few hours.

Trunks, on the other hand, became a shadow, never leaving Zandre's side. He actually helped out as she continued checking over the textbooks and the work the children had given. Zandre was amazed that he had read the books, considering how hard it was for her to get some. He helped out with the two patients that showed up; helping them into the dining room, trying to help mix the medicines, getting the bandages.

As the last one left, Zandre went back into the dining room and started mixing some medicines. Trunks came in and sat down, just as Bulma closed the last book. "I'm surprised Gohan's not here," Bulma stated, working a crick out of her neck.

"I'm surprised you didn't ask about him Zandre. He told me what happened," Trunks added, gaining a stern look from his mother.

"It's okay Bulma, I'm almost past it. Besides that was months ago..." Zandre added.

"Only two. I'd be paranoid, out here all alone," Bulma mumbled.

"But she not alone Mom," Trunks said then turned to Zandre, "Where is he anyway?"

"In the laundry room behind the dryer. Be careful with him, little brother's starting a new phase," Zandre replied, watching as Trunks went after him.

"How do you...wait Gohan said something about Piccolo making sure you knew it all. I'm still amazed he's not here," Bulma said.

"Well our relationship..." she started, "You know how his mother is," Zandre changed, more for Trunks sake then hers as she realized he was coming back. Bulma nodded once then turned to watch her son enter with a large flat basket, a large green-gray egg pillowed on blue and white fabric. He set it down on the table with a gentleness Vegeta had rarely used with her. She smiled as he hesitated, almost touching it, afraid for it. Zandre giggled as she came over and put it in Trunks hands. "Just treat him like a baby Trunks. Talk to him, tell him about you, that way he'll know you when he hatches," Zandre told him as she helped him position little brother in his arms.

A knock on the door made Zandre turn him around, sending him down the hall. "I really don't want others to find out about him yet, so go sit in one of the bedrooms while I take care of this," she told Trunks, watching as he headed back.

Zandre quickly went to the door, letting in a fifty-some old man, who noisily followed her in, leaving the door open. "Zandre darling, it's just me coming for some more of that tea. It's really helping out, I hardly notice any stiffness," he rattled out, following her into the dining room, "Who is this? I hope I'm not intruding."

"No Mr. Ashiro, this is a friend of mine. Bulma Briefs meet Kenjo Ashiro, the mayor of the Greentree village," Zandre said, introducing them both.

"Ms. Briefs, oh it's an honor and a privilege to met you. Zandre, if you know her, do you know Son Gohan also? That would be such a treat for the celebration tomorrow night," Mr. Ashiro rattled out.

"What celebration?"

"Didn't I tell you, Greentree is having an anniversary celebration. Tomorrow will be five years since we pulled ourselves out of the rubble and started rebuilding our town. We are gonna have a big feast and a dance tomorrow night. Everyone in the village wants you there. Will you come?"

"Zandre, are you okay? What would possess you to leave the door wide...?" Gohan said as he came in, leaving it hanging as he entered the dining room, realizing who her company was.

"Zandre you really do!!! Son Gohan it is such an honor to meet you. I'm Kenjo Ashiro, mayor of Greentree. We are having a celebration tomorrow night and it would be a great honor if you would grace us with your presence," Mr. Ashiro said, vigorously shaking Gohan's hand.

Zandre and Bulma laughed at the look of confusion and embarrassment on Gohan's face as he tried to make sense out of the rambling he just received. "Uh... I don't know if I can sir..." he muttered out, trying to pull his hand away.

Zandre turned to her shelves, taking one of the many pre-made pouches and, pulling Mr. Ashiro's hand off of Gohan's said, "I'd love to come, it's been forever since I've been dancing. When's it starting?" as she handed him the medicine.

"The feast is to start at six o'clock. They'll be actual music at the dance. Some of the kids scavenged up all the equipment so one can deejay. It should go great," he replied, then turned to Gohan, "I hope you can come, if even for a few minutes. It would mean so much..." he said over his shoulder as Zandre lead him out.

Zandre came back, calling out, "It's okay Trunks, you can bring him back out now."

As Trunks walked in, he asked, "So can I call him little brother too?"

"I don't see why not. So did you talk to him?" Zandre answered, gently taking him from Trunks.

"Yes. I told him about all the stuff I want to show him when he hatches," Trunks replied, sitting at the table again. She turned to Gohan, his head hanging in embarrassment and said, "Your turn."

Gohan raised his head and shook it in confusion, raising his hands, "No Zandre, I really don't want to, not now."

"Calm down Gohan. It's not like he's gonna pee on you or anything. You just need to hold him, talk to him, treat him like he's here, like a baby. That way he'll know you later," Zandre said, placing little brother in Gohan's arms, "If you want some privacy, go to the bedroom."

Zandre turned back to the table, finishing her mixture and said, "That celebration should be fun. Just my luck tomorrow's my day off, I'll have time to fix up my dress."

"What do you mean?" Bulma asked, everyone watching Zandre.

"It's something I started a long time ago. I take every Saturday off. No patients, I'll only work if it's an emergency. About the dress, well... it's been a while, I don't know if it will fit. This gives me all that time to do whatever fixing I've got to," Zandre replied, turning to her shelves, putting everything away.

Zandre noticed a few empty spaces and grabbed her deep gathering basket off the floor. "I've got a little gathering to do, you guys can stay here, come along, whatever," she offered as she moved to the doorway.

Bulma stood and said, "Actually, we've got to get going. I've got how many jobs that need to get done myself," she moved around the table, "It's nice to meet someone else that can understand them. I hope we can be friends Zandre," she added, stopping in front of her.

"I thought we already are," Zandre joked. "Of course. So now you know how much I can help. Don't ever hesitate to come again," she replied giving the older woman a hug.

Bulma pulled away, stepping back as Trunks came over, "Thanks Zandre, it's been great. Can I come see little brother next week?" he asked.

"Anytime Trunks, anytime you can," she replied, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Trunks smiled and hugged her, saying "See you tomorrow," as Bulma pulled him through the house, out the door. Zandre laughed at him, turning to see Gohan place little brother in his basket.

"Why don't you?" she asked.

"I can't, not right now. Maybe later," he replied, picking up his basket and heading for the laundry room.

Gohan landed about a half mile away from Greentree, still not sure why he was there. He had to admit it was to see her, maybe even dance with her. But he knew what would happen if he showed up; someone would recognize him and he would be surrounded by everyone, amazed he'd shown up and begging for tales of his life, his father.

Tonight he didn't want to go through that.

Gohan slowly walked closer to the dance, thinking about how he was going to do this. He hid his ki as much as he could, hoping she wouldn't sense him, or be nice enough to let him stay hidden. Gohan stayed in the shadows, on the outskirts watching.

He wasn't surprised to find a crowd around her; he was surprised at their ages. Almost fourteen children were crowded around her, helping out reading some children's novel. All the adults sat around, listening intently as the children read out characters lines. After a half-hour, Zandre closed the book, getting a few groans and pleads from the few children that were still awake. She solved that problem by giving them the book and they happily ran off, arguing over who got which character.

As soon as all the children were taken to bed, the music started and the dance floor was cleared of the tables and chairs. Gohan laughed to himself, realizing the few couples that were dancing were married. Zandre sat to the left of him, a small group of young women around her, almost every available young man around them.

Gohan stayed back, watching her dance with almost every man there, occasionally resting. As he watched most of the teenage boys, some barely older than Trunks run after the drink she requested, he wondered how she got away with not having to heal anyone. _'They probably don't need it, being so close to her. Knowing her, she probably announced at the start that she wouldn't.'_

He was a little surprised as she politely refused every dance proposal, making them dance with one of the girls she was surrounded by. Gohan couldn't see much of her from his hiding place; all he could tell was her hair was for once free, flowing in loose waves down her back.

The next song suddenly pulled on him, taking him back over a year, to his stay with her. _'It was one she stopped everything for.'_ He turned to find her spacing off, ignoring all the questions and offers she received. He didn't even realize he was moving until he started parting the crowd, trying to get to her. She didn't even look; she took his offered hand and stood, following him out to the floor. That song finished just as they wrapped their arms around each other, but another she knew started. He watched as she buried her face in his shoulder, feeling tears fall. He noticed all were watching them, so he buried his face in her hair; half to hide his embarrassment, half to gain some sense of privacy.

_'Could we leave soon?'_ she mentally asked as the song stopped, not raising her head.

_'Let's give them something to talk about,'_ he replied, trying to lighten her spirits. He could feel her smile as he took off, ignoring the gasps and headed for her house.

He landed near the edge of the cliff, not letting go till she raised her head.

She pulled away, turning around. "What was it about that song Zandre?" he asked, not knowing if she'd answer.

"It feels like he's singing about me, my life," she paused turning to him, "It's all I want out of a relationship Gohan. Someone who'll help me put my past behind me, show me he cares. That's all I want." Zandre replied, turning away again.

Gohan just stood there, watching her try to hide her tears. He didn't know what to say. It was all he wanted_. 'But I can't have it, I can't put her through everything else.' _"Zandre...I-" he started.

"It's okay Gohan. I realize you've got a lot on your shoulders. You've got a lot you need to work through and I'm willing to give you all the time you need. I'm not trying to push you into anything, okay?" Zandre replied, drying her eyes and turning to him.

He finally got a good look at her. She was wearing a short, sleeveless, dark blue dress that reminded him of the coat he used to wear as a child. It had the high collar and simple lines, fitting her perfectly. 'You may not be pushing, but you sure are tempting.' He thought, suddenly wishing he hadn't. Getting no sign of a response he continued, "Zandre, you know I care about you, but I ... I know I've got problems to work through, I only wish..." '...you could help.'

She nodded moving close, "You know I'm here for you. If you need to, come. No matter when, no matter why. Okay?" she replied, almost hugging him.

He just nodded, pulling her close, completing the hug. As they pulled apart, she moved to the edge, sitting down and looking out over the ruins. Gohan took a seat next to her, remembering, "Why were you reading that book?"

Zandre laughed slightly before turning to answer, "It's what I used to do for room and board as I came here, if I couldn't heal anyone. Don't get me wrong, being an eleven year old traveling alone I was rarely turned away; but I felt I had to repay, no matter how small it was. Being a bookworm, I'd pick up every whole book I could find. One night I was reading one while the women were making supper. It was raining; so all the children were inside, underfoot. I called them over and started reading out loud."

"One of the characters made a strange sound before it spoke and one of the children had read it before and kept telling me I was doing it wrong. So I asked if he wanted to read that character and soon I had them all handed out," she said, scooting closer to him.

 "Do you remember the story?" he asked.

"No. I gave them the book before I left the next day. The children wanted to know how it ended. Anyway, I've done it so many times since, with so many stories, I can barely remember the one we read there," she replied, somewhat shocked as Gohan's arm slowly moved around her shoulders.

"No wonder the children like you so much. You actually let them help out, treating them like equals, explaining whatever they want to know," he said.

She slowly placed her head on his shoulder, knowing he was referring to more, "You're talking about something else, aren't you?" she smiled as he tensed, "It's okay Gohan, I don't care if you watch me while I gather. The kids find it weird."

Zandre almost giggled as he started fidgeting, "They know?"

"It's hard to hide anything from kids, I don't even try," she replied, taking his hand, trying to soothe him, "I told them they'd understand when they're older, of course, they all groaned."

They both laughed, remembering getting that response themselves. They sat there in silence, looking at what was West Capital.

"It used to be so beautiful from out here," Gohan replied, some of the pressure from his other life bringing his spirits down.

"We could make it that way again. It will take a while, but we can," Zandre replied, raising her head, watching his face.

"Could we? I don't know..." he replied, the pressure pushing harder.

Zandre reached out taking his face in her hands, turning him to her, "Gohan, we can do anything if you believe in it and us. Do you believe in me?"

"Of course I do. You're one of the good things that's happened to me in too long a line of bad. You always seem to raise me up again," he replied, his hand covering hers.

"You've got to keep yourself up Gohan. You've got to believe in yourself, that you can do it. I believe you can destroy those tin cans."

"You're just saying that," Gohan replied, siding back down.

"No, no I'm not Gohan," she replied, shaking his head, "I believe you could put out the sun of you tried. You've got to believe in yourself. Do you?" Zandre asked letting him go.

Gohan turned back to the city, tears standing in his eyes, "My Daddy used to say I was so powerful I'd split the Earth if I used it all. But I could never see it. Piccolo used to do things that would show me how powerful I was. But I could never do them alone. And now..." he stopped, his voice thick with emotion.

Zandre reached out, gently stroking his cheek with the back of her hand, then rubbing her hand up and down his arm, "It's okay, go Gohan. I'm feeling worn anyway."

He turned to her and smiled before he took off.


	6. Believing For So Long

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch.6 Believing For So Long 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story…

Warning: This part is a lemon. It takes a while to get to, but it is a lemon.

            "Zandre! Gohan! Are you in there? What have you done with my son? Where is he? Gohan, you better not be hiding anything from me! Come out here now!" woke Zandre up bright and early the next morning. She quickly pulled on her robe, rushing to the door to find ChiChi pounding on it, Ox King trying to calm her down. Zandre opened the door and ChiChi rushed inside, checking each room over, still yelling at her son.

            Zandre turned to the only coherent guest she had, "What's going on Ox King?"

            "Oi Zandre-san, Gohan told us last night he was going to talk to you. ChiChi went to get him for breakfast and realized he never came home. Is he here?" Ox King asked just as ChiChi returned to the entryway.

            "He did show up here last night and we did talk. I accidentally brought up some painful memories of his. He didn't want me to see how much it was hurting him, so I told him it was okay if he left and he did. I thought he'd go home after he got control of himself."

            "Well he didn't! My poor baby's out there somewhere hurting and you just let him go! How could you do that to him?" ChiChi almost yelled in Zandre's face.

            "Simple. BECAUSE HE'S A GROWN MAN! I accepted that he didn't want to talk about it, that he wanted to be alone, so I told him to go. He CAN take care of himself! He MAY need help with some of his problems, but it won't help HIM until he realizes it. Gohan's NOT a child anymore! He doesn't need or want you continually pressing him to talk, to stop fighting, to dump all your problems with what he's doing on him! He knows how you feel and he hates the fact you do, but he can't change his life just for you! If you really care, you'd be more worried about how he feels not how his actions are hurting you!!" Zandre yelled, turning on her.

            ChiChi almost fainted; amazed anyone would talk to her like that. She stood by in shock as Zandre turned to Ox King, "Why don't you two go home? I think I know where he is. I'll go change and bring him home as fast as I can," Zandre said, turning to go back to her room.

            They were pressing on him again.

 All his reasons to fight.

All those he lost.

All his mother's expectations.

Every person that had died because he couldn't kill two androids.

            He'd left Zandre's house and came right out here. The badlands he used to train in with his father, with Piccolo. He could almost feel them there, encouraging him, pushing him harder. His movements got swifter, stronger as their presence gained strength.

            Before he realized it, he was moving as if actually fighting them, visualizing them there. He kicked, punched, jabbed, blocked, and blasted at imaginary foes. They both jumped away, flying in circles around him, crossing paths in front and behind him.

            He grinned wickedly and brought his cupped hands together, focusing his ki, "Kame... ha… me... HA!" he yelled, twisting and firing it behind him.

            "NOOO!!!!" he screamed as he made Zandre's form out within the path of the blast.

            She had stopped as she noticed the blast being fired, approaching her with blinding speed. She crossed her arms in front of her face and braced herself, ready to block. Gohan stood by in shock and watched as she braced herself, his Kame-hame-ha blocked and dissipating around her.

            Zandre shook the ringing in her ears and landed, running to him as he fell to his knees, "It's okay Gohan. I'm fine. Don't worry about me," she replied, kneeling in front of him.

            "I could have killed you," he said, nodding in disagreement, tears rolling down his cheeks.

            "No you couldn't Gohan. I would have dodged it if it would have been that strong," she paused as he put his head in her lap, his arms going around her waist, "It's okay Gohan, let it all out," Zandre whispered, stroking his back, letting him cry his heart out.

            They landed outside his house almost an hour after she found him. Neither said a word as they walked in the house, Gohan leaning heavily on her. They went straight to his room; she helped him get in bed, still wearing his clothes. He was out before she pulled the covers around his neck.

            She silently walked out, stopping in the kitchen, ChiChi and Ox King still in shock, "Nothing to worry about, he's just exhausted. I'd tell you to leave him alone, but he's sleeping so heavily you couldn't wake him no matter what you did." With that said, Zandre started outside.

            "Wait," stopped her halfway out the door. She turned to see ChiChi watching her, her hand held up. "Thank you," she whispered.

            "He means a lot to me."

            "I know that now. I also realize... I have been... selfish all these years, trying to get Gohan to change back to that little boy I could protect.... But he's...not that...little boy anymore. I want to thank you for making me see that."

            "I'm sorry for being so harsh, but I just couldn't stand there and listen to you treat him like he's five or six. I'm glad it helped, but I'm sor..." Zandre said.

            "It's okay. I'm glad to know there's someone who'll protect him, even from me," ChiChi interrupted.

            Zandre bowed deeply, "It's an honor," she paused, turning back to the door, "Besides, he means too much for me not to," she said before she left.

            "Come on Miko, push!" Zandre encouraged the soon-to-be mother that arrived at her door a few hours ago.

            The almost grandfather was helping his daughter, the almost new father pacing nervously behind Zandre. Suddenly the makeshift phone Bulma had left her started ringing. Zandre turned to the expectant father and said, "If you won't help here, go in the kitchen and answer that!"

            He jumped at her tone, then rushed out of her spare room to answer it. He hesitantly picked it up, "Zandre's house."

            Gohan's hopes were squelched, "Is Zandre there?" he asked nervously.

            "Yes, but she's busy at the moment," was followed by Miko yelling in pain.

            "Oh. Tell her Gohan called," he quickly replied, hanging up.

            A baby's scream pulled the new father back to the spare room. Zandre was just handing the newborn girl to her mother as he walked in. "So who was it?" she said, turning to the father.

            "Huh...oh, some guy named Gohan," he replied, going to his wife and daughter.

            _'Gohan! I wonder why he called. I haven't seen of felt him for two days. I hope he's okay,'_ Zandre thought, getting worried about him as she watched the little family oohing over its newest member.

            Gohan landed on her cliff, shocked again to find the front door was wide open. He quickly walked to the house, stopping halfway as he heard Zandre's voice, "You are not naming this baby girl after me!"

            He stayed where he was, watching as Zandre walked out of the kitchen, carrying a little bundle in her arms. "Sorry little one, this bar isn't open. Let's go see mommy," Gohan heard her tell the baby, walking over to look in the spare room's window. Zandre gently woke the new mother, showing her how to position the baby and stood back, smiling as the father and grandfather started arguing over the name.

            "You are not naming her after me!" Zandre said again, turning to the window, seeing Gohan and said to them, "You'll have to excuse me, someone is waiting for me outside." She rushed outside, stopping about two feet from him.

            "Is something wrong Gohan?" she asked, her worry and fear coming across.

            He gently smiled, "No Zandre. I finally figured it out. It's time I admitted it. I love you Zandre."

            What?!? But why...?"

            "I couldn't tell you...admit to these feelings before because...well, you said it best, I didn't want to pull you into the dangerous life I lead. And I don't. But I also didn't want you to give up yours. I told you, after my month here, that you gave me a safe haven. A place I could be me. Forget my power. Forget my past. Forget my duty. I could have the kind of life I always wanted," he started.

            "But..."

            "But I couldn't forget that, not completely. When I told you I couldn't explore this relationship further, I'd realized I'd already pulled you in too far. I couldn't risk loosing you because I ... But then, the bandits attacked and I realized then I couldn't leave you out, even before little brother was explained. I tried, I tried. But the dance made me realize I can't."

            "When we were talking, you showed me what you want, how much you believe, care for me. I left in tears because...I had one more person to protect, who loved me. Also because I realized we are already tied together, I'm as much a part of your life as you are mine," Gohan paused, tears in his eyes.

            Zandre nodded silently, tears running down her cheeks as he continued, "I knew I had to do whatever's necessary to protect you, to save you from what Momma and Bulma have gone through, so I went out to practice. I felt my heart skip a beat when I saw my blast heading straight for you, it almost stopped as you blocked and when you said you were okay."

            "I've spent these last two days thinking Zandre. I've been so scared of pulling you into my life all this time because of what could happen to you. But you showed me that you can be a part of my life, that you can take care of yourself and everyone else. I didn't want to because you'd be loosing the life I wanted to live. But I realized all I really want is you. We can make our own life together," Gohan said nervously.

            Zandre closed in, hugging him tightly, "That's all I've wanted Gohan. Ever since the day we met. I love you," she replied, burying her face in his chest.

            He held her tight, finally letting himself savor the feel of her. He slowly took her chin, turning her to him, kissing her with all the love and tenderness he felt for her. They both stood there for a moment, lost in the kiss, before hands started roaming over bodies, stroking the long-hidden passion. Gohan's mouth slowly released hers, running kisses down her neck, his hands finding her breasts.

            A baby's scream suddenly brought her back to reality, "Gohan, Gohan we can't. Not now. They won't be able to leave until tomorrow."

            His head fell to rest on her shoulder, "I don't know if I can last until tomorrow," he whispered, sending shivers down her spine.

            Zandre reached up, pulling the bandana from her hair and placing it in his hand, "Here. Something to fuel your fantasies," She half-joked.

            He lifted his head, and removing his right wristband said, "At least part of me can join you tonight," putting it on her right wrist, kissing the palm.

            Zandre took the bandana, twisting it around his wrist, replacing the exchanged band, "So I can join you in your dreams tonight," she said, pulling him into a kiss.

            The baby crying pulled them apart again. Gohan reluctantly backed away, not wanting to loose sight of her. _'Tell me when,'_ he thought.

            _'Not a second later. It's been too long already.'_ She replied, watching as he flew away.

            It had been an unbelievably long and tiring day for her. They started right after breakfast and didn't stop until sunset. It was just as bad as the last rampage of the Jinzouninjin. She even checked with Bulma if they were at it anywhere, even though every patient gave a viable reason besides the androids.

            As soon as the flow stopped, Zandre turned off the red light and showered, hoping it would wake her up. She had just gotten out and started to eat some of the food that was given to her, when she saw his wrist band, remembering as she slipped it back on.

            _'So is it safe to come?'_ his mind voice suddenly intruded.

            _'It is on this side, I don't know about on yours,'_ she replied.

            _'I'll be there in a few minutes,'_ Gohan replied smugly, she could already feel his ki approaching.

            _'Come on in,'_ she thought seductively, heading for her bedroom, _'I'll be waiting.'_

            Gohan landed on her doorstep and went on in, for once not upset at her about the door. He headed straight for her bedroom, sending a cursory glance toward the laundry room, feeling his presence within. As he got to the doorway he stopped, a slow smile crossing his face.

            Zandre was stretched across the bed on her stomach, wearing a large blue-gray tee shirt that was riding a little too high underneath her, her damp, deep green hair fanned out to her left, lost in sleep. He stood there watching her, amazed by her simple beauty. Her right hand slipped out from underneath the pillows and he almost laughed._ 'So she's still wearing it. I have to tell her how hard it was to explain this.'_ He thought as he moved his right hand, adjusting her bandana.

            Zandre squirmed a little more, causing her shirt to move a little, giving him a new urge. Gohan slowly removed his shirts, quietly placing them on the floor as he sat down on the end of the bed, silently removing his boots. He stood and moving to the left of the bed, slipped in under her right arm. Zandre snuggled close, feeling the warmth of his body, her right leg moving onto his. Gohan slipped his right arm under her neck, loosing it in her hair as she placed her head on his shoulder. That movement tried to rekindle his passion as he realized how high her shirt was riding.

            Zandre slowly woke up; reaching to her right to turn on a tape she usually listened to as she went to sleep. Moving her leg to reach it, she suddenly realized someone was with her. She quickly pushed the button and adjusted the volume, innocently rubbing her breasts against him. Gohan groaned in pleasure, still lost in sleep. She got a little nervous as she tried to get back in her place, feeling their bodies responding to her movements. His left hand moved, slowly running up her right leg, stopping at her hip underneath the shirt. His fingers started to make slow little circles and she slowly turned to him, realizing he was awake.

            Gohan slowly opened his eyes, smiling at her as his hand started sliding higher. Zandre reached back, gently stopping his hand. "Is something wrong Zandre?" Gohan asked, ready to get up.

            "No Gohan, nothing is wrong. It's finally going right for me, for us. But... I wanted to tell you how I feel. You bared your soul, it's time I did mine," she replied.

            He slowly nodded his understanding and she smiled, "It's kind of ironic really. You were so scared of pulling me into your life, when part of me wants so much to be in that life," she paused, pressing her fingers to his lips, "You don't understand. The reason I got so good at hiding my ki is it was all I was allowed to do after we left the monastery. Mama didn't want to be reminded of Papa. I'm surprised she still let me heal people," she said, her hand sliding down to his heart, drawing slow little circles around it.

            "I remember watching them practice, tales Papa told me of his fights. As I grew up, I'd watch the fights, collect articles, anything to keep some tie to Papa. Then They came and Mama thought we should... I was so happy; I'd get to see him again, maybe even fight with him. But as we came he..." she paused, a few silent tears running down her cheeks.

            He wiped them away as she continued, "I was suddenly alone, not sure what to do. I kept coming, hoping someone would teach me how to fight. But, as I was coming, I realized I had another ability, one that I didn't need any training for. That's when I remembered Papa telling me I should do whatever I could to help. So I kept coming, healing everyone I came across, hoping someone could train me, but putting the healing first."

            "That's why you didn't tell me."

            "Yes, that and everything I told you before. I finally came across some of you, only to witness the death of one of the strongest. I realized then that you had only one ally and you had to train him from scratch. So I felt it was best to hide my power, you already had too much on these," she said, her hands gently massaging his shoulders.

            "As you kept coming and we realized how similar our lives are, you became a friend. When you said I was so much help with your problems and you helped me with mine, I realized you had become more, but I knew I had to wait until you were ready to..." Zandre said, some of her pain creeping into her eyes. Gohan saw it, about to say something when someone started singing his feelings:

            _I can tell by the look in your eyes you've been hurtin'_

_            You know I'll never let you down...oh no_

_            And I'll try anything to keep it workin'_

_            You gave me time to find out_

_            What my heart was lookin' for_

_            And what I'm feelin' inside..._

            He chuckled slightly and took her chin, pulling her close, "I guess it fits," he said, kissing her passionately.

            As they parted Zandre said, "I suppose I have to stop and sing along," she joked, pulling away.

            "The hell you do," Gohan replied, pulling her close, his hands sliding back to her waist.

            They were both a little surprised; Zandre at his choice of words, Gohan at finding out the tee shirt was all she was wearing. His hands slowly started up her back as she straddled his lap. Zandre leaned back into his caresses, her hair falling in a curtain in front of her as her shirt ended up around her neck. Gohan sat up as he pulled it over her head from behind, using it to gather her hair behind her as he threw it to the floor.

            Zandre sat still and blushed nervously as Gohan took in her nude form. He slowly reached out with his left hand, tracing her jaw as he said, "Is this..?"

She slowly nodded, her blush going deeper as his fingers went down her neck, along her collarbone, his hand going flat against her as her stroked her breast gently. She closed her eyes as the sensations he was creating rippled through her body. She quickly opened them as his right hand touched her cheek.

            "I know you'll be gentle," she whispered, kissing his palm as his right took a similar path as his left. As the sensations doubled, Zandre found her own hands caressing him everywhere; his back, his chest, his arms. The sensations getting stronger and a wetness building between her legs made her dare to go between his.

            She slid her hand down his pants, within his boxers, her fingers lightly stroking him. Gohan shuddered involuntarily, his head falling to her right shoulder. She hesitated, then heard him hoarsely whisper, "Don't stop."

She pulled her hand free, trying to remove his clothes. Gohan looked up in shock, then realizing what she was doing, he slowly rose about a foot above the bed. They quickly removed his clothes and Zandre stopped, a little of her nervousness returning. Gohan gently smiled in understanding and pulled her into a deep languorous kiss as they slowly lowered back to the bed.

            He slowly ran kisses down her neck as he laid back, pulling her along. The kisses kept going down as Gohan rolled them over, running them around her breast, lingering at the peak before running them to the other. All Zandre could do was lay there, running her hands through his hair, torn between preventing or prolonging this exquisite torture.

            He slowly took his trail of kisses back up to her mouth, showing her how much he loved her as his hands roamed all over her body. Her own hands slid out of his hair, down his scarred, muscled torso, stroking his...Gohan paused, groaning into her mouth, showing her what she was doing to him.

            Zandre got a little more daring, knowing she was giving him the same sensations he was building in her. She started running kisses down his neck, forcing him to role over as she came to his chest. Her hands slid up his body as she straddled him, putting her so close to... She started kissing his chest, his scars, her mass of hair falling everywhere. His hands slid into her hair, holding it out of her way. He laid back and watched as her kisses ran lower and lower, putting her closer to him.

            Gohan gently pulled her back up, kissing her as he rolled them over. His hand slowly slipped down her body, his fingers playing between her legs. Zandre laid there, gasping at all the sensations that were running up her body. When she could think again, she reached for him, smiling when her paused in his assault on her.

            Zandre took his chin, kissing him with all the love she had for him as he stopped, taking his hand away from her. Gohan pulled back, looking her in the eye, trying to tell if she...Zandre slowly nodded back, wrapping her legs loosely around his hips. He gently touched her face, pulling her into a long deep kiss as he slowly entered her.

            They just laid there for a while, kissing and caressing as he contained his need for her, allowing her to get comfortable, adjusting to this new sensation. She slowly responded, hands roaming freely, kissing with such intensity, and finally moving her hips against his. He kept it slow at first, giving her time to get the rhythm. She got it quickly and, as her needs gained strength, she forced him to roll over. Her hands came to rest beneath his shoulders as they started moving faster, the pleasure and power building between them. All at once she felt his body tense up beneath her as their pleasure took control, shooting to her fingers, her toes, even her teeth.

            It finally subsided and she laid down on top of him, feeling it release him as well. They just laid there, arms going around each other as they slowly caught their breath.

            "Are you okay?" Gohan asked, his left hand stoking her hair, his voice tinged with worry.

            Zandre turned to him, smiling, "I've never felt better. I just hope it gets better," she replied, stretching against him.

            He leaned his head forward, meeting her in a kiss before whispering, "There's only one way to find out."

            He moved his hips again, starting a new feeling within her, "Oh Gohan!" she moaned as they started building new sensations.

            Zandre woke up and slowly stretched, stopping when she touched something warm and solid. She slowly opened her eyes to find little brother in bed with her and, after a mental search, Gohan gone. She slowly sat up, wondering if she'd be stiff or sore after the countless times they made love. She saw his basket on the floor, seeing a note within the clothes. She slowly picked it up, and putting him in her lap, read it aloud:

**Zandre,**

**I'm so sorry I can't be there to watch you wake up, the sun **

**shining in your hair, your eyes, but I've got to get home. You **

**know my mother thinks we've already done this before. I **

**only wish I could come see you during the day, but as you **

**know that's almost impossible.**

**I want you to know I don't regret anything we did. We opened **

**up, admitted how we feel and expressed our love. Watching you **

**now makes me want to again. But we can't...**

**Not now, we have duties**

**Zandre, I love you. You are the only one I can really open up to. **

**You know me better than anyone. And now I know you feel the **

**same way. I don't know when I'll be able to come again, **

**hopefully tonight.**

**                                                            Until then**

**                                                            Gohan**

**p.s. sorry about little brother. I finally had that heart-to-heart **

**with him and thought you'd like to know.**

            Zandre smiled, looking at the green-gray egg, "So now you finally know how you big brother feels," she said, placing him in his basket as she headed for the bathroom.

Author's note: the song is Heaven in Your Eyes by Loverboy. It's on the Top Gun Soundtrack.


	7. Livin' Inside This Hell

Not Much Between Despair and Ecstasy Ch. 7 Livin' Inside This Hell 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Oh, mild citrus and heavy emotion.

She'd been antsy for almost an hour now. She'd shut herself in the laundry room, holding little brother as she felt the push and pull of kis in battle. Both of them slowly weakening made her put him down. "I've got to do something."

_He'd suddenly woke up, knowing he had to see her, fulfill the dream. He pulled on his pants and slipped out his window, flying straight to her house. He landed at her bedroom window, amazed to find it locked. He gently tapped on it, making his presence known, touching her mind with his._

_He watched her slowly wake, a slightly annoyed look on her face until she looked out her window. She stood and quickly came over, opened the window and said, "Gohan, it's three in the morning, why are you here?"_

_He reached out, pulling her through and taking off; kissing her below her ear before answering, "I had a dream about us and that hidden spring you almost..." he didn't finish, as he started running kisses down her neck._

_"I almost...oh gods... that was months ago, before we..." she replied, her hands roaming all over him._

_'I know. I've had the dream almost every night since then,' he thought, his mouth busy kissing her as his hands pulled her shirt higher._

_"Then why..." she tried to think, her body being exposed to the cool rushing night air, his lips going to one breast, his hand gently kneading the other._

_'This time... we made love as we flew there,' he thought, pulling one of her hands to his pants._

_She took the hint, quickly trying to free his..._

"...Gohan. Gohan, can you hear me?"

_They hovered about three feet above ground, neither sure they could stand or who was supporting who. Zandre slowly pulled away, kissing him as he withdrew. Putting her down first, Gohan slowly landed, testing his own legs. She turned away, going to the water's edge, "This is almost the same spot."_

_"Uh-huh"_

_She looked over her shoulder to find him standing there, staring. "So what do I do?" she asked, smiling innocently, "This?"_

_Zandre walked into the pond, stopping when it was ankle deep, taking the bottom of her shirt and slowly pulling it up as she walked deeper in. As it got waist deep, she stopped, pulling it completely off, and turning to Gohan, threw it at him. "Will you stop gawking and join me?"_

__

"Gohan, come on talk to me," brought him slowly back to consciousness.

He opened his eyes to find himself in the infirmary at Capsule Corp., Bulma and Zandre both tending to all his injuries. He watched as Zandre reached over him, to his left shoulder and he reached out, stopping her, "No, help Trunks first."

"Don't you remember, you gave him the last senzu bean. He went after ChiChi," she gently replied, putting his hand back on the bed, reaching for his left shoulder again.

He didn't even realize what he'd done, until he heard her hand hit the bed rail. She pulled back in shock, rubbing her hand as he said, "Don't."

"Gohan, she's just trying to..." Bulma stopped at the angry look he gave her.

"What is it Gohan?" Zandre asked, her voice low, shaky.

"I don't want you to. Just go away and stay away," he said, turning to look at her, his face set in a cold, determined glare, "I want to do it myself."

She just stared, then slowly nodded, turning away before the tears started to fall. She walked out, opening the door just as ChiChi got there. She slipped on past, leaving ChiChi and Trunks behind.

"Why isn't Gohan healed?" ChiChi screamed, stomping her foot as she turned to Zandre.

She quickly turned, yelling, "Because that stubborn, idiot son of yours won't let me!" her anger at the son finding a release in the mother. Zandre quickly turned, running out of the building, taking off toward her house.

Someone knocking on her bedroom door woke Zandre up. "Zandre, I'm sorry but we need your help out here," Trunks called through the door.

She slowly got up, wiping her face. She picked up little brother and went to the dining room. "We were doing fine until this little girl showed up," Trunks said following her.

Zandre stopped, amazed to see Bulma leaning over a five-year-old girl that was sitting on the table, trying to figure out her problem. She passed little brother to Trunks and turned to her patient, "So what's wrong here?" she asked as cheerful as she could.

As Bulma showed them out, Zandre sat at the table, Trunks giving back little brother. Bulma came in and sat next to her saying, "We thought you could use some help today. When we got here, you were still asleep, so we tried to do it without you. There were only two others."

"You don't have to dance around it Bulma. He's mad at me for some reason."

"No he's not Zandre, you know it's because of..." she stopped, both turning to Trunks.

He stood there, trying to hold in the tears, getting a small smile from Zandre, _'He's so much like...' _She looked him in the eyes, "You know..."

Trunks just barely nodded, his lips almost quivering into a smile.

"Then go," she said as she turned away, feeling him rush past her.

Bulma rose, about to go after, when Zandre stopped her, "Let him go. He needs to be alone. This is one of the hardest lessons."

"What do you mean?"

"No matter how strong you are, you still have to face the consequences. Someone will get hurt. Don't get me wrong; I'm not blaming him. After a while, he won't either."

They fell silent, both knowing how long Gohan carried all his guilt, "You know he's not mad at you Zandre."

"I don't know, but something about me got him angry," she replied, the tears welling up as she stroked little brother.

"Well, how does he feel about you healing him?" Bulma asked getting analytical.

"He'll only let me do the serious ones. And it is..." she replied.

"Maybe something happened before that..." Bulma stopped as Zandre's face fell.

Her tears silently started as she hugged little brother, whispering, "Oh Kami!"

Bulma put a hand on her shoulder and asked, "What is it Zandre? What happened?"

"He was knocking on my window at three in the morning. I opened it and asked why he was here, and before I knew it, he pulled me through the window and we took off. He said he'd had a dream about us making love as we flew to a hidden spring and he just had to make it real," she replied, turning to Bulma, absently wiping her tears.

"You think that's why?" Bulma asked.

"Not all. It's part of it. I don't know how to explain it or why he thinks so, but I think he meant something else."

"He tells you he doesn't want you to heal him, to go away, he wants to do it himself, you two made love early that morning and you're reading what?" Bulma asked, confused.

"I think... I think he feels I'll do everything for him now that..." she said, her tears breaking through again.

"You think...?"

"That's most of it. But the others are part of it," she finished, hanging her head, trying to hide her pain. _'Why would he think...?'_

Bulma sat there, wondering what to do. She finally stood up, hugging Zandre from behind and said, "I'll talk to him about it when I get back."

Zandre gently shook her head, "Don't. You know he won't... I think I should stay away for a while. He'll get madder if I come," she paused turning to Bulma, "If I did, it would just prove how he's feeling."

Bulma lightly chuckled, "I think his aim's off. ChiChi's barely left his side."

She 'humph'ed, "She still treats him like he's seven," Zandre paused, thinking, "But what would you do if that were your son?"

"That's just too scary to think!" Bulma said, trying to shake the feelings it evoked.

Zandre stood slowly, turning to Bulma, "Why don't you go back? I think I'll just go turn off the light and call it a day," she said, trying to hold back her pain.

Bulma looked her in the eye, seeing all that pain and a determination to bear it, "I can keep you posted on his condition," she offered, remembering loving a stubborn man herself.

Zandre smiled weakly, responding mentally, _'Just a stray thought now and then.'_

Bulma jumped a little, not used to that sort of thing, "Okay then. Zandre, stay hopeful. I'm sure he'll be out here apologizing as soon as he's able."

Zandre smiled, holding little brother to one side as Bulma hugged her good-bye. She walked her to her aircar, watching her take off, before turning to the path up to the light. Zandre slowly walked up the mountain, absently stroking little brother as she came to the tower it was rigged on.

She unlocked the box, pulling the switch, pausing as she heard someone jump above her.

"It's okay Trunks, I'm just turning it off," she said, turning to the pale lavender hair hanging over the edge.

"Mom left!?" it was more of a statement then a question.

"Yes. I told her we both needed time alone," Zandre replied, turning to go down the path.

"Zandre...?" made her stop.

"I meant it Trunks. Whenever you're ready."

"Thanks," he replied.

"Anytime," she said, going home.

It had been two of the longest months in her life. She'd occasionally peek in Bulma's mind asking about him, even though Bulma showed up every Saturday telling her how he was physically and mentally. Trunks had almost taken over Gohan's place, picking up some of his habits. She'd catch him watching her gather; sometimes he'd show up with some injury he didn't want to show Bulma. There were even times he'd offer to help, staying all day, spending his free time with little brother.

That afternoon had been amazingly busy, but she saw his hair at one point and feeling little brother being moved to her bedroom confirmed it. Zandre knew he needed some time to himself, so she kept working. As the flow stopped, she turned off the light and went back to her room, only to find him asleep curled around little brother, Gohan's shirt laid out on the pillow.

Zandre slowly left him, going into the kitchen. She dialed up Bulma's number, knowing he wouldn't be leaving til morning. She started throwing something together for supper as she waited.

"Hello?"

"Hello Bulma, it's me. He's here, been crying for hours from the looks of him."

"Zandre, oh thank Kami he's not alone. Did he say anything?"

"No, why?"

"Gohan's healed completely. We took the casts off today. Trunks sat through it all, staring at his face. When Gohan started flexing his arm, accepting that... he bolted out as fast as he could. Gohan said to leave him be, let him figure it out. Then he sort of spaced out. I think he knows Trunks has been spending so much time with you."

"He knows I'd..." Zandre paused, controlling herself, "Is he looking for him?"

"No, he left here six hours ago. ChiChi called about ten minutes ago asking when he'd be home."

She barely sent her mind out, feeling his flinch away, "He's okay, just trying to get used to..." she replied, turning back to her cooking, "Gotta go before I burn dinner. Talk to ya tomorrow."

"Bye Zandre, tell him I love him."

"He knows, but I'll tell him," Zandre replied turning to find him in the doorway.

"You called Mom."

"Just to tell her you were here. She said she'd be by tomorrow," Zandre said, pulling dinner together.

"She told you about him then? That he's healed now."

"Yeah, he's pulled the disappearing act. ChiChi's worried sick," she said, serving the meal. Zandre sat at the table and ate, watching as Trunks stared at the food, torn between his hunger or his mentor. "Sit down and eat Trunks. Gohan's okay, he just needs some time alone to accept that he's lost his arm, and away from ChiChi," she added, trying to lighten his mood.

He suppressed a chuckle as he sat, "And I thought my mom was overprotective," he said before devouring his food.

She smiled at him, watching him act like he normally did, knowing it would all come out later, "Believe it or not, but mine was worse."

"No way! No one could be worse than ChiChi!" Trunks exclaimed.

"Try having your mother tell you all you can do is hide you ki. No practice, no flying, only hiding. If you got caught doing anything else, you got the worst possible punishment for a whole month," Zandre answered, getting up to start dishes.

He quickly brought his dishes over, "Boy that had to suck. I never thought anyone could be worse, but yours was."

She was surprised when he grabbed a towel, started drying, "It was bad, but I found ways to do what little I know. I'd do it when she was gone. I have something she never told me I couldn't use."

"How could your healing help?" he asked confused.

_'Not my healing silly, my ESP,'_ she thought, making him jump.

"Wow! You'd use it so you'd know when she was getting close, right?" he asked excitedly.

"Yeah, for a lot of other things too," she said, winking at him.

He laughed as they put the dishes away. As they finished, Zandre turned to him and asked, "You gonna keep yourself occupied for awhile, I've got to take a shower."

Trunks nodded, turning to her bookshelf, "Maybe I can find one I haven't read."

"If you haven't, there's probably stuff in it your mom doesn't want you to read," she laughed heading for the bathroom.

Zandre came out in a tie-dye tee and some boxers to find Trunks curled up on her bed again reading. "So you get to the good parts yet?" she teased.

"No, it's taking forever just to describe the setting," he replied, pausing to watch her brush her hair.

She was quickly and a little harshly getting all the knots out, a small smile crossing her face as she watched him flinch a few times. "How can you stand it?" she heard him ask.

"Simple, my hair's always been long and thick. After all the years of brushing it, you get a little used to the pulling and the knots," Zandre replied as she finished, coming over to sit on the other side of the bed.

She turned to the nightstand, grabbing her book when he asked, "Can we talk?"

"Sure," she replied, putting her book away and picking up little brother.

"I ...I still don't know what happened. We were fighting them, he had 17 and I had 18. Neither one was budging, then suddenly she started overpowering me. I tried to get it back, I never called for help, but..." Trunks rattled out like he was reliving it in his mind.

"He did, didn't he?"

"Uh-huh. Now he was fighting both and he wasn't strong enough. I tried to help, but then they fired this huge ki ball. I woke up healed when you landed and I realized he'd given me the last senzu bean," he said, curling on his side, facing her, Gohan's shirt clutched in his hands. "I didn't mean for it to happen. I should have fought harder, done something. If only I hadn't asked to come along," he said burying his face in the shirt.

"Not you too," she said pulling the shirt from his face, " I did this with Gohan too. He blamed himself for everyone's death. I told him the same thing I'm gonna tell you. Do you honestly think he blames you Trunks?"

"No, not really," he replied, trying to hold back his tears.

"Of course he doesn't. Gohan knows you did your best; otherwise he wouldn't have let you come along, right? If you've got to blame someone, blame the Jinzouninjin, they're the one's who hurt him Trunks, you didn't," she said, putting little brother between them.

Trunks inched closer, his arm reaching out over little brother, across her lap. Zandre patted that hand, her other going to his face, pushing the hair from his eyes. "It'll be all right Trunks, you'll see. Now go to sleep," she said, rubbing his back.

He smiled through his tears, closing his eyes and was soon lost in sleep. Zandre smiled at him as she pulled Gohan's shirt from his hand, bringing it to her face, breathing in his scent. _'I waited for you once, I'll wait for you again.' _She twisted within Trunks arms, trying to cover little brother with the shirt then adjusting her pillows. As she finished, she reached for the covers bunched at the end, covering them all up as she said, "Sleep well everyone," and leaned back, closing her eyes.

After a few minutes, he turned from the window and flew home.

It was almost sunset and she was sitting on the edge of the cliff, waiting. It had been four months since the fight and Gohan had picked up Trunks training again. She met Trunks out here almost every night since they started, to heal him a little, both mentally and physically. She had gotten up and was just about to go back in when she heard him weakly call, "Zandre."

She turned to the city again to see Trunks, severely beaten and barely airborne coming to her, Gohan floating a good thirty feet away, not even scratched. She turned back to Trunks, who was slowly going lower and lower. She flew out to him, supporting him until they landed on the cliff.

"You didn't have to be so rough with him. Just because you're training him doesn't mean he's your personal punching bag! Don't take your anger out on him!" Zandre snapped as she helped Trunks to lie down.

Trunks grabbed her hand, "Stop Zandre, that why he beat me so bad, I started yelling at him for how he's treated you," he whispered, letting her remove his hand.

Zandre quickly checked him over, healing what had to be first, responding, "That's sweet of you Trunks, but that's our problem, not yours."

"But Zandre you're my friend and I can't sit by and let him..."

"TRUNKS!!!" Gohan bellowed, his anger so obvious in his voice.

Zandre turned to him in shock, that her gentle caring Gohan could sound so cruel, "There, I healed the worst and only half-healed the others. That only makes it two days until you're healed completely, but that should be more than enough time for him the control his temper. I want you to go home and go to bed, then come here and help me the next two days, that way he won't hurt you more," she said, helping Trunks up.

"But Zandre..." Trunks said.

"Go before I make them worse. Anyway he knows where I'm at when he's ready to talk," she said as she turned to Gohan, his face a determined mask. "Go home Trunks," she said as she started toward hers.

"See you tomorrow, I guess," he replied, turning to Gohan as he started off.

"Go." Gohan replied, watching her go inside.

He left as the last light went out.


	8. One Thing I'm Sure Of

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch. 8   The One Thing I'm Sure Of 

Author's Note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story… there's citrus, oh yeah, there's citrus.

Oh, and I really want to thank everyone that's reviewed, especially this chapter. Not counting the phone call at the beginning, this is the first part of the story I did write. It's very gratifying and encouraging getting so many reviews for the first piece, you know. -

He slipped into the kitchen quickly when he realized he was alone. He went to the makeshift phone and dialed a new number.

"Hello,"

"Hello Zandre-san, it's me, Ox-King."

"Is your back acting up again? I can be there in a few..." Zandre started.

"No, no, my back has never been better Zandre-san. But I have been wondering why you haven't been spending much time with Gohan? Especially since he's..." Ox-King replied.

There was a long pause before she answered, "Well Ox-King, it's because I'm trying hard not to change the way our life together was," Zandre replied, her voice shaky.

"What do you mean?"

"Ox, think about it, Gohan's lost his left arm. His whole life's been turned upside down because of that. I'm sure he feels like he's lost control, he's got to re-learn, adjust to his life. It's not going to help him if we change everything so he doesn't have to do it or help him do it."

"But Zandre-san..." he started.

"Let me put it another way. How did you used to feel when your back would go bad and Gohan and ChiChi would have to do things for you?" she asked.

"It would be nice at first, but..."

"As it went on it got annoying, frustrating. How do you think Gohan feels, knowing he could do it, knowing he can, figuring out some way to, only to have one of you do it for him?" Zandre picked up.

"Oh. I never thought about that," Gohan overheard.

"I know it's hard to treat him like you used to, like nothing's changed. He needs to do things on his own, regain his sense of control."

"I understand Zandre-san," Ox agreed solemnly.

"You've got to do it. He needs to realize he can live with it, adjust, but he also has to realize we've got to too. So please don't tell him about this, that's why I haven't been by. I'm giving him some sense of control, independence."

"Okay, I won't tell him. Thank you for explaining this Zandre-san," Gohan heard as he left, ChiChi overheard as she walked in with the laundry.

"Daddy, are you talking to her? Give me that phone! Zandre how could you be so cruel? I thought you cared for my son!" ChiChi roared, dropping the basket and grabbing the phone.

"I do!!!! I love you son more than life!!!!! That's why I've done what he's asked! He doesn't need his life turned upside down just because he's lost his arm. He needs to know that his life is not different just because he's lost his arm!!! Sure he's got to adjust, adapt, but doing everything for him isn't helping at all!!!!" Zandre screamed into the phone.

She slammed it off, turning to go shower, hoping to release her tension and remove any sign of her tears.

She just put the last dish away and turned to hang up the towel when she felt it. It kept teetering between _'just to let her know I'm here'_ to _'please come to me, I need you'_. She threw the towel on the counter and headed for the door. There he was, at the edge of the cliff with his back to her. As she slowly went to him, she noticed his left sleeve, empty and flapping in the breeze.

"Why did you...?" stopped her about three feet behind him.

"You asked me to. It hurt, but I did. You know I still... it was hard, but you asked me to. I just had to remember watching you say that... all that pain and determination... I just kept reminding myself why," she answered, gradually inching closer.

She saw him slowly nod in understanding, the pent-in sobs shaking him. Her left hand went out, slowly tracing the character on his back and he let it out. A heart-wrenching yell as he fell to his knees, pounding the ground, letting the grief, pain, and anger loose all at once. She just stood there awhile, not sure what to do. As the sobs took control, she sat in front of him, stroking his head, neck, and shoulders, doing what she could to soothe that pain.

He slowly stopped crying and, realizing his head was in her lap, he sat up. She just smiled and rose, pulling him to his feet and into the house. She sat him on the couch, and got him a glass of water. She hesitated at first where to sit, but sat to his left as he finished off the water.

He slowly put the glass on the coffee table, not looking at her and said, "Zandre... I'll understand if you never..."

She felt like slapping him, "Gohan, I can't. I love you," she paused, rising to kneel in front of him, "I love what's inside, not this body. I can't just turn it off because of this," she said, as her right hand covered what remained of his left arm, her left taking his chin, making him look her in the eyes. "I know this is going to be hard for you and me to adjust to, to accept, but we can and we will," she said, finding her fingers absently caressing his shoulder, tears standing in his eyes.

She quickly pulled away, only to have her hand caught in his. He nodded once, and slowly removed his shirt, letting her see what was left. His head rested on her left shoulder as her fingers traced the intricate scars on his. She felt the tears fall as she leaned in, covering the area with kisses. She slowly started them up his neck, when he pulled away.

"Zandre, no... I don't...  want your... pity."

"Who said this is pity? I love you Gohan. And I can think of no better way to prove it," she replied, her hands sliding down his muscular scarred chest, past his belt to rest on his slowly stiffening member.

His hand snapped out, pulling hers away, "Zandre... I said no pity. Especially from you."

She suddenly took his hand in both of hers, placing it between her dampening thighs, "Does this feel like pity to you?"

He sat there staring in shock as he slowly realized she was wearing what she usually wore to bed, nothing but an oversized blue-gray t-shirt. She took full advantage of his shock, hands stroking him through his clothes, pulling at the belt and waistbands, trying to gain access.

She suddenly stopped, shivering in pleasure as his shock wore off, his fingers probing slowly. She fought to maintain some sense of self-control, realizing how this had to feel to him. She almost cried out as he moved to kiss her, his hand leaving her feeling empty and aching. His hand slowly moved up her body, caressing her as he gathered her shirt. She fought the urge to pull it off, help him out, still she moved her arms just right so as he pulled it over her head it fell in a pile on the table behind her.

He took her hand, helping her stand; his eyes never leaving hers. She stood tall, proud and beautiful in front of him and for a moment, he reveled in that fact, that this magnificent woman really loved him. He snapped out of that as he felt her hands slowly cup his face, turning it to hers. He responded to this unspoken signal; scooting closer to the edge of the couch, bringing his heat and need closer.

She leaned down, kissing him quick before pressing his mouth to her breasts. She held him to his task as his hand went to remove the last bit of his clothes. She smiled as she felt his hand finally return to her body, slowly sliding from her thigh to her waist to the small of her back.

She pulled his head away from her breast, up to her mouth, leaning him back as she slowly straddled him, her hands floating down to his manhood. The tremble she caused in him was more than enough proof that he was willing. He removed her hands and, in an amazing show of strength, lifted her into position. A gratified moan escaped her lips as she felt his familiar form fill and complete her. Loosing what control she had, she pressed his face to her breasts again as they both started moving in that pleasing satisfying rhythm.

She almost giggled, feeling the pleasure and power building between them. The energy slowly built around them, making them gradually rise until they were hovering about two feet above the couch. She pulled back to watch his face as the ecstasy began to overtake her. She moaned loudly as it hit, watching his body react; his head snapping back, his short black hair flushing a pale blonde, those coal black eyes she could always read turning a brilliant blue-green, matching hers.

As suddenly as he transformed, he reverted back and they fell to the couch with a loud flop. They both sat there, laughing as much as they could out of breath. As they calmed down, she reluctantly pulled off him, sitting to his left, placing her legs across his lap.

"That didn't happen before," she stated as she laid back.

"I didn't even know it could," he replied, his hand absently rubbing her knees.

She propped herself up on her elbows, "Do you want to see if it will again?"

His eyes darted to his lap and she could feel his response. She giggled slightly as she sat up, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a deep, meaningful kiss. Before she realized it, his arm slipped under her knees, lifting her and he rose, heading for her bedroom.

She was woken up by gently choked sobbing. She opened her eyes to find they were facing each other, Gohan's armless shoulder painfully visible. His hand stole over his face as soon as she woke. She didn't know what to do. She hesitantly reached for him, only to have him pull away. "Gohan, I want to help. Tell me what I can do?"

"Can you give me my arm back? Can you make everyone stop pitying me? Can you make them realize I'm not an invalid? I can still do things," he almost yelled at her.

She moved closer, deliberately putting her hand on his left shoulder, "No, I can't do those things, and yes, I know you can still do things, you've proven tonight that you can do them even better. But you've got to remember; we've got to adjust to this just like you do. I've fought against urge after urge since you got here. I just kept reminding myself, it won't help him adjust, find some way to compensate if I do it for him," she said, tears welling up.

"I can see why this would upset you, make you mad. But I know you, and how you don't let others know you're mad at them. It's okay Gohan that you don't want to get mad at them, but you've got to say something when they treat you like that. They probably don't even realize it. It won't change until you ask them to," she finished, a few tears silently falling to the pillow, her own pain clearly written on her face.

His hand slowly left his face and went to hers, wiping away the tears. She looked him in the eye, seeing all the pain so clearly, but a tiny glimmer of hope and understanding was peeking through. It made her smile; slowly, gently, realizing she had helped him. She reached out, pulling him close as they let all their pain and tears loose.

She woke just as the sun started peeking in her window. She rolled over to see him heading for his clothes. She quickly pulled on her robe and followed. She stood in the doorway and forced herself to just watch as he slowly pulled his clothes back on. As he finished, he turned to her and what she saw almost broke her heart; he was just as melancholy and full of pain as he had been when he arrived last night.

She went to him and took his hand, "Remember what I told you last night Gohan. You have to say something to make then realize it, make them stop. Okay?" her pain coming across in her voice.

He made their hands go to her cheek, made her look him in the eye, "What about you? How do you feel?"

She pulled him into the kitchen; near the stereo she kept there, and took a tape out of the machine. She put it in his hand; tapping the side it was ready for, "Listen to this side when you get home. It explains better than I could."

He gave a little smile, "Fits our life huh?" and slipped it in his pocket.

She nodded briefly and kissed him. They slowly pulled apart and he stoked her cheek, his thanks so clearly written in his eyes. They moved to the front door, and stood briefly, not knowing what to do.

"You should get going. Your mom's probably worried sick by now."

"Yeah...Zandre, thanks..."

"Hey, I love you. It's what I'm here for," she replied, hugging him tightly.

"I know. I love you too," she felt his reply rumbling through his muscular chest.

They pulled apart and her hands drifted to his face. "Don't ever hesitate about coming back. If you ever need to, you know where to find me."

He smiled at all the love and worry he heard in her voice. "I know and I will," he leaned in, kissing her with every ounce of love he had for her.

When it finally finished, she had to lean on the doorframe to keep standing. He gently stroked her cheek and turned away, going to the edge of the cliff. He turned to get one last look at her as he slowly started rising. She smiled and said, "Remember."

He returned the smile, just as warm, loving and playful, "I will," he replied, leaving her watching until he couldn't be seen.

He landed in front of the house, the scents telling him his mother was awake. He decided to go on in; if she asked, he'd tell her he just need some air. As he walked in, he saw his mother rush to the kitchen door and stand there, fighting some inner struggle. _'She knows. Bulma must have told her to let me have some time alone. But I wasn't alone._' He almost smiled.

He went to kiss his mother, "Good morning Mama. Is it okay if I shower before breakfast?"

"Yes Gohan dear, it's not quite done yet. Be careful you don't wake your grandfather."

"Yes, 'kaasan."

As soon as he was out of sight, he pulled the tape out of his pocket. He popped it in the little radio they kept in the bathroom and started the tape just as he hopped in the shower.

                        ...so if you're feeling lonely, don't

                        you're the only one I ever want

                        I only wanna make it good

                        So if I love ya alittle more than I should

                        Please forgive me

                        I know not what I do

                        Please forgive me

                        I can't stop loving you

                        Don't deny me this pain I'm going through

                        Please forgive me

                        If I need you like I do

                        Please believe every word I say is true

                        Please forgive me

                        I can't stop lovin' you...

Gohan was glad he was in the shower.

Another note: the song is Please Forgive Me by Bryan Adams.

And believe it or not, I didn't know about the whole 'Super-Saiyajin-to-get-pregnant' thing either. I didn't even see the 'History of Trunks' movie until I'd finished this whole story. It was all worked off info I'd found on-line. Really.


	9. All I Ever Wanted

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch. 9 All I Ever Wanted 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story…

She found him knocked out on the rougher cliffs of the mountain. She landed quickly, checking him over as she called his name, "Trunks, come on he needs us! Trunks wake up!"

"Ughh... Zandre, where's Gohan? What's going on?" Trunks groaned as he got up.

"We don't have much time Trunks, he's barely holding on, we gotta go!" Zandre practically yelled as she started off.

Trunks shook his dazed confusion, only knowing that he couldn't loose his mentor, the closest thing he had to a father. He followed her until he could make out the faint trace of Gohan's ki. Zandre forced Trunks to land about three blocks away, running to Gohan.

As he caught up, he yelled out, "Why did we just do that Zandre?"

"They don't know about me and I hope to keep it that way," she called out just as they got within eyesight.

Gohan was barely on his knees, 17 holding him up by his head as 18 pummeled his chest. 17's clothes were ragged, his right arm was hanging motionless and backwards, and his whole right side was badly burned. From that distance Gohan looked like he took just as much as he gave. Until they stacked the odds.

Zandre forcibly kept Trunks at her side, placing her hands on his shoulders, "Trunks, give her your most powerful blast. I'm gonna try to add my ki to yours, I should be able to help control it, so don't worry," she said as she moved behind him, hands still on his shoulders.

He didn't hesitate for a second, calling up his anger and frustration, slipping into Super Saiyajin as he collected the energy in his hands. She closed her eyes as she poured her energy into him; half to help her concentrate, half to burn that image from her mind. A scream, a yell, and Trunks escaping her grip brought her back.

Zandre saw Trunks fly after a retreating form and a humongous ki ball. A grunt took her to her reason for being. She was at his side in seconds, already healing the worst. "Gohan, don't you dare die on me! Not now!" she tried to sound authoritative through her tears.

"Zan...dre don't... it's too..." Gohan tried to say, his jaw broken.

She had to force herself not to slap him, "Don't you dare put our baby through the life we had!"

The shock tried to register on his broken, swollen face, "Aahh... baby?"

She paused long enough to take his hand, placing it over her lower stomach and letting the faint little ki be known to him, "Yes Gohan, a baby. Please stay alive Gohan! Keep fighting for me and our baby," she told him at they both felt Trunks approach.

"For both of..." Gohan tried as the pain took over.

A reassuring hand on her shoulder brought her out of her half-sleep.

"So how is he?" Bulma asked from behind her.

"All I left were some of the breaks and most of the minor cuts. But his ki's so weak anyway I'm scared he won't...." Zandre responded, stroking his hair.

"If what you told him is true, he'll make it. Gohan won't put his own child through his life," Bulma said, watching as Zandre slowly blushed.

"I forget how good their hearing is," she replied, turning to Bulma, "So where is he anyway? I told him Gohan's condition and he ran out."

"He went after ChiChi. He wanted to know Gohan would be okay before he left. You know how she is," Bulma replied.

Zandre got up and went to what was left of his clothes, "Only too well," She paused as she checked his pockets, pulling out a tape, "Wow, it survived that," she said, smiling.

"What is that?"

"I gave it to him after we made up, after I made him realize loosing his arm didn't mean he'd loose me. I sent him home with it the next morning," Zandre replied, slowly going back to his side, thinking.

"What is it Zandre? Is there something wrong?" Bulma asked.

"I just... I'm worried how he's gonna feel when he realizes..." she said, her eyes falling to the tape.

"You mean... Are you sure?"

"It would have to be. The last time we... was four months before that, the night before he lost his arm. It's been five months since that, I'd be showing some, I would have known sooner if that were true," Zandre rationed, keeping her voice low.

A silence fell over the room, both women wondering. Bulma turned to Zandre, a sudden wash of mothering overcoming her as she watched the young woman trying to solve her problems. She followed Zandre's gaze, eyes falling on the tape as she got the idea. Bulma quickly stepped out, grabbing the closest stereo she could find. She came back and set it up within arms reach of the bed. She took the tape out of Zandre's hands and started playing it.

"Bulma, why...?"

"Don't dwell on your problems. Remember the good times. I'm sure it's safe enough for you to climb in with him right?"

She caught a faint smile play on Zandre's face as she turned back to Gohan, slowly gently joining him in the bed. Bulma quietly walked out, placing a hand over ChiChi's mouth as they met in the doorway. "Don't you dare ruin this for them ChiChi! They are happy and madly in love. She almost lost him. If it wasn't for the baby she's carrying your son would have no reason to keep fighting, to keep living."

ChiChi just stood there, staring at the lovers in the bed, "Trunks said she healed most but he's still pretty weak. If they are making me a grandma, Gohan will pull through. He's too much like his father," she paused, moving to lean on the wall, still watching them, "They really do belong together. She's been one of the good things in his life."

Bulma leaned back against the door, shocked, "ChiChi, last time you said anything about Zandre you were mad at her for forgetting Gohan. What's changed?"

ChiChi smiled and Bulma turned to see Gohan snuggling closer into Zandre's embrace. She turned back as ChiChi started to explain, "That was a little over a month ago. Not long after that I walked in on Daddy talking to her on the phone. Zandre made me realize I'd been treating him wrong, that he's got to adapt not that I've got the change everything for him. And... I found out he wanted it that way. He was still trying to protect her. I just had to accept that..." she stopped, tears welling in her eyes.

"...that he's a grown man. But you'll always be his mother," Zandre picked up, scaring both women. She shifted a little so she could see them, catching Trunks peeking through the doorway, "I knew I got through to Ox, but I didn't know about you. Oh and Trunks come on in."

He blushingly walked in as ChiChi said, "Now you know you did."

Zandre quickly sat up, turning to Gohan before he groaned, his eyes slowly opening, "Where...Zandre? Am I still...?"

She smiled, leaning in, kissing him passionately, "What do you think?"

He smiled at her as she slowly pulled away, "I definitely am. But why do I feel so weak?"

Zandre gently stroked his once-broken jaw, "I healed most of it. But you've got to remember I can only heal physical injuries, I can't replenish your ki my love. You've got to do that yourself, with plenty of sleep," she replied around a yawn.

"Sleep..." he mumbled, "You need to too. After all this healing and being..." Gohan stopped the knowledge re-emerging.

"Yes, we are going to have a baby Gohan," she said as she laid next to him again, "And you are right, we both need to sleep," she added, her head nestling on his left shoulder.

The others took the cue, silently slipping out. Once they were alone, Gohan's hand went to her stomach, stoking in disbelief. Zandre reached out, stopping his hand, letting that little ki through. Slowly a smile crossed his face as he drifted off. She laid there, a little confused and shocked as her exhaustion took over.

The slow push and pull of kis woke Zandre early that morning. She jumped as she realized she was alone in the bed. She got up as fast as she could, running through the building, closing in on his ki. She found him outside, blasting and swinging at Trunks who was blocking and dodging. With so many emotions overcoming her, Zandre took off, heading home.

Both half-Saiyajins jumped at the burst of energy. Gohan's head fell as Trunks said, "You knew she'd be upset."

Gohan gave him a reassuring smile before he took off after her. He didn't even try to overtake or even catch up to her. _'She deserves this.'_ He gently landed on her doorstep, now mindful of his injuries.

As he walked in, Gohan scanned the house, finding her where he thought he would. She was sitting on the edge of her bed, her back to the door, curled around what he felt as little brother. Her shoulders slightly shaking made him realize she was crying.

Her head popped up as Gohan entered the room; going to the stereo she kept in there. He watched her wipe away her tears and place little brother on the bed as he put in the tape. He felt her move up behind him as he pushed play.

"So how much of my healing have you messed up, Gohan?" she asked, going professional to try to hide her pain.

He turned to her and reached out, pressing his fingers to her lips as the song started playing.

                  .....sending on more angels

                  on a restless wind

                  all I ever wanted was the simple things

                  if a love like ours means anything

                  show me a sign hon'

                  an' dip your wings....

As soon as the first verse finished, Zandre turned away and went to the window, keeping her back to him. Gohan slowly joined her, stopping about a foot behind her. As the song stopped, they stood in silence for a while, lost in their feelings.

"Zandre, I'm sorry I did that. It was wrong. Trunks tried to stop me, talk me out of it, but I just kept pushing. I'm sorry," he paused, his hand going to her shoulder, "Zandre, please tell me how you feel..."

She spun around, turning on him, "How I feel!!!!!!!!! How mad I am that you even THOUGHT of doing that! That you were willing to let those things kill you! That you weren't even thinking about who you were leaving behind, what that would have done to us! God damn you Gohan for being so damn stubborn!" she exclaimed, forcibly removing his hand.

"But Zandre I didn't know about..."

"I'm not just talking about the baby! I mean Trunks, Bulma, your mom and grandpa, little brother and me! Did you even once think about us? Did you!?" she screamed, hitting his chest.

"Of course I did. I couldn't get YOU out of my mind! I knew all of them would be strong if I did die. Everyone knows it may happen that way. But I was worried about you! I knew you'd be strong for everyone else, but you wouldn't have anyone to be strong for you. I wasn't sure if little brother would be enough. I don't ever want to leave you Zandre! I love you too much!" he replied his arm pulling her close.

The gentle caring hold and his words broke her down. The tears started flowing as her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, "Oh Gohan! I was terrified I was gonna loose you! I couldn't live without you! I love you too! I was so scared our baby was gonna grow up like I did! I didn't want our child growing up only knowing you through stories. And I couldn't even think what to do with little brother," she said in his ear.

He gently stroked her back, whispering, "Just let it all out. I can't promise it won't happen, but I can promise that I'll never let it happen again. They'll know me Zandre, both of them. I love all of you. And...thanks."

She pulled back a little, looking him in the eye, "Why Gohan?"

"For letting me help with your problem. For telling me how you feel. For letting me be in your shoes," he said, absently wiping away her tears.

She weakly smiled as she put her head back on his shoulder, "You're welcome Gohan. And thanks."

He smiled as he wrapped his arm around her, content to just stay there. Unfortunately, she had other ideas. After a few minutes more, Zandre reluctantly pulled away, "We should be getting back. It's not good for you to be up like this and at least your mom is probably paranoid about you. Let's go," she said, putting her left arm around his waist.

"I hate to admit it, but you're right about all of it," Gohan confessed as they walked through the house.

Zandre stopped outside the kitchen door, a puzzled look on her face as she turned to him, "Are you strong enough to fly back or do I have to dig out one of my transport capsules?"

Gohan stood there for a while, lost in thought and suddenly chuckled, "No, I'm not but I've got another idea, if it'll work," he chuckled again, pulling her outside.

They took a step off the landing and taking as deep a breath as he could, Gohan yelled near the top of his lungs, "Nimbus!!!"

A little gold cloud suddenly streamed out of the sky, stopping in front of them. He chuckled again as he took his arm off her shoulders and patted the cloud, "I was wondering if you were still around."

Zandre slowly walked up, amazed, "It's real. It's actually real."

"How would you have...?" Gohan started, confused.

"When Papa taught me how to fly, I asked if there was another way. He said he had a friend who had this little gold cloud he could fly on if he yelled for it. I should have realized he was talking about your father," Zandre replied.

"Master Roshi gave it to my father before he learned how to fly. I was beginning to wonder if it was even around anymore," Gohan added as he slowly started to hover.

Zandre quickly helped, her arm going back around his waist as they lowered onto it. "So, do I get a lift?" she teased.

"Have I ever turned you down?" he asked.

"Well..." she teased, playfully poking his good side.

"Let's go Nimbus! On to Capsule Corps," Gohan called, laughter joining its golden streak.


	10. You Helped Me See

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy Ch. 10 You Helped Me See 

Author's note: standard disclaimers apply; I don't own DBZ, the Mirai timeline, etc. I'm just borrowing them. All I do own is Zandre and every twist and turn I'd made. Anyway, on to the story…

"Bulma, can we talk?" Zandre asked as she walked into the makeshift lab.

"Sure, give me a sec," Bulma replied, rolling out from underneath a spider-like vehicle, "What's your problem Zandre?"

"I was wondering if you could help me, if you have some machine that could help," she replied, walking around to join Bulma on the other side.

"What do you mean Zandre? And what the hell happened to you?" Bulma replied, joining her, shocked at the white toga-like dress and large stomach Zandre was wearing.

She smiled a little as she moved the left side, revealing little brother wrapped tightly to her stomach, "I knew I'd be spending most of the day here. He should be hatching today and I'm supposed to stay with him continually so I rigged this up. I just wonder what Gohan will..." Zandre stopped, going to one of the chairs in the room, slowly sitting.

"What is it Zandre? Is that why you're asking for help? Is it Gohan or the baby?" Bulma asked, concerned.

"It's the baby...but it's not what you're thinking, ChiChi's already telling horror stories of birthing part Saiyajin children. It's something else," she paused, her hands absently rubbing her 'stomach', "You know my ability can be used to see inside a person. Well I was wondering if you've got something that could do that for me."

"Why Zandre, is there something wrong?" Bulma asked, putting a concerned hand on her shoulder.

"No, it's not that. The night I told Gohan, you know I let him feel the baby's ki, right? Well, since that night I keep feeling something different, and since my ability only works for me when I'm asleep I can't figure out for sure," Zandre rattled out, trying not to look at her.

It was quiet a while before Bulma responded, "You don't mean..."

"I'm not sure, but I think there is two. I want to be sure before I tell him, so please don't. So do you have something that will work?" she said, turning to her.

"Yes, it's not in here, it's in the infirmary. But Zandre, you two haven't even talked about when they were conceived yet."

"I know Bulma I know. He's realized it though, I can tell by how he treats me. Showing up looking like this will definitely put it in his mind. I want to talk to him about it before we take off the casts. I'm just nervous about his reaction, especially if we are having two," Zandre replied, trying to stand.

Bulma reached out, helping her up, "Knowing Gohan, he's probably more worried about you and the babies than his own feelings."

"You're probably right, but he's got so much to worry about, I don't want to give him more," Zandre replied, her shoulders falling.

Bulma's hands went to Zandre's shoulders; "You've given Gohan a renewed strength, a reason to keep fighting no matter what, to not give up. Any addition to that will only help him. Go to him Zandre, tell him everything."

She smiled at her friend, "You're right Bulma," Zandre steeled herself as they headed for the infirmary, "What is that you're working on? Is it the time machine?"

"Yeah, it should be ready tomorrow, if you guys are," Bulma replied as they came to the door.

They found it sitting wide open, hearing Trunks' voice coming out, "I don't know how she did it Gohan, but she sent her power through me and that's why it was so big. It was mine and Zandre's."

Both women got an evil grin on their faces before Bulma took Zandre's arm, Zandre placing her other hand at the small of her back, letting Bulma lead her into the room. Zandre didn't look up until they got to the foot of the bed, only to see both jaws hanging, eyes wide in shock. She tried to keep a serious face as Bulma started in, "Gohan, what have you done to this poor girl? Yesterday she wasn't even showing and now I'm surprised she's not in labor! If this is what happens when you two have children she's gonna..." Bulma stopped, trying not the laugh, it looking like she was so upset.

"I...uh...Bulma, Zandre I had no idea this would..." Gohan started, trying to get up, amazed and confused.

They finally gave into their laughter. "No Gohan, don't. It's not what you think. She's just playing with you," Zandre replied through her laughter.

"What do you mean?"

She flung off the part covering her front, revealing a snug little brother. Gohan sighed in relief as Trunks joined his mother in the laughter.

"Why did you bring him along?" Gohan asked confused.

"He should be hatching today and I'm supposed to maintain a constant presence with him, so I rigged this up. Besides, I thought I could use some practice," she said, trying to sit in the chair next to the bed.

Trunks and Bulma both hopped up; he helped Zandre into the chair, she tried to keep Gohan in the bed. "Come on Trunks. They need to be alone." Bulma said, pulling her son out, shutting the door behind them.

Zandre couldn't look at him, staring at her hands placed on little brother, she started, "Gohan, we need to talk about the baby and when..."

They sat in silence for a while, his hand slowly joined hers, "Zandre, I realized...it had to be that night...after I lost my arm...when you made me realize all I was doing was maintaining the pain and anger...by pushing you away, keeping to myself, letting everyone else do what I didn't need... what I couldn't do. I know that first... was to show you still love me, you don't care. And I realize now it was the same for me. You gave me hope that night Zandre. Not just hope that our love can survive anything, you gave me hope for a better life, a better world. I would like to name the baby Nozomi, if it's a girl, my hope for a better world."

Zandre quickly wiped the tears from her eyes, rising from the chair and sat on the edge of the bed. "I so happy that I got through to you, made you realize I'd love you no matter what. That we can have a better life even if you have only one arm. Gohan, there's something else I've got to tell you."

"What is it? Is something wrong with the baby?" he snapped out, almost sitting up.

"No, no, they're fine Gohan," Zandre said, taking his hand in hers.

His hand slipped from hers, taking her chin and forcing her to look him in the eye, "'They'... Zandre, you don't mean..."

"I'm not sure, Bulma says she's got some machine that could tell us. We're gonna check after we remove the casts," she replied, removing his hand.

Zandre pulled away, pushing her feelings aside, turning professional as she let the others in, ChiChi and Ox-King had arrived, and as all four came in, she turned to the patient. Neither said a word as the casts were quickly removed. Gohan slowly pulled on his clothes as the others oohed and aahed over Zandre, the egg and the baby.

"If you guys wouldn't mind, Zandre's asked me about checking her and the baby over, so everybody out," Bulma said, pushing ChiChi toward the door.

Gohan half-laughed at his mother as he helped Zandre up on the bed. She started to do a little unraveling to move little brother upwards and he reached out to help, suddenly stopping as he realized, "That's Piccolo's."

"It was the only thing I had that would work. And it's one more thing he's familiar with," she replied, holding little brother to her chest as she lay down.

Bulma wheeled over a cross between a computer and a welding arm, "So let's see if your suspicions are true Zandre."

Bulma adjusted the height and placed the arm over Zandre's lower stomach, punching away at the buttons. She stopped, a slight smile crossing her face as she turned the screen to the parents. Two fuzzy tiny forms could be seen, complete with Saiyajin tails.

Zandre turned to Gohan, trying to measure his reaction. He sat there, staring and slowly rose, leaving without saying anything. Bulma quickly followed, joined by ChiChi as Trunks and Ox-King joined Zandre. One look at the screen and they understood why.

"Zandre...is that true?" Trunks babbled.

"Zandre-san, you know Gohan's just shocked," Ox said as he removed the scanner, helping Zandre up.

"I know Ox I know," she sighed, sitting lotus style with little brother in her lap. A sudden wiggle brought her spirits up. "Hello there," she chorused.

Zandre quickly pushed the fabric off him, bundling it up around him, her hands resting on her knees. The wiggling became more frantic as she noticed Trunks run out.

"Is there anything we can do Zandre-san?" Ox asked just as the others walked in.

"Not really. You guys are just lucky to witness this," she replied, not taking her eyes off him.

She suddenly jumped, and as she set it upright everyone realized why, he broke through. Slowly the whole shell cracked up and fell off, revealing a pink and green two-year-old in human terms, still in the egg sack. His eyes slowly opened and her turned to Zandre with a small smile and a look of recognition.

Zandre smiled back and addressed the others as he took a hold of the sack, "I don't want you guys to scare him, so try not to jump as he..." she stopped as he shoved the sack into his mouth, not stopping until he swallowed it whole.

"Greetings little one. I know this isn't home, but Gohan here just got out of this bed from his injuries," Zandre started as she took parts of the shell out of her lap.

"It's okay Zandre. You explained it before. But this is nice. Thank you," little brother replied, patting the cape and helping her, shocking everyone else.

They had it cleared quickly and Zandre loosely wrapped part of it around him. She picked him up, his head nestled on her left elbow as a yawn escaped him. "Sleep well, little one. I'll tell them about it."

He smiled at her, his hands closing around her braid as he fell asleep, a golden glow encompassing them both. She looked up to find the others all staring speechless. Gohan and Trunks slowly started inching closer, both asking, "Wha...?"

Zandre giggled as she turned back to little brother, catching a small smile cross his face, "We're completing the family bond. That's part of the reason I had to sleep with him. It was establishing the bond from him to me. This is making the one from me to him. When it's finished, we'll have a little more than a parent-child relationship. We'll know each other's feelings, if the other's in danger, what the other's doing. A lot like a telepathic link actually," she summed it up.

"Then that would explain." Gohan mumbled, turning an almost pleading look to Zandre.

She just smiled, _'That's exactly why.'_

He returned the smile just as Trunks asked, "Did it work on me too? He was with us that night I ..."

Zandre smiled, nodding him closer, "It did Trunks, but not as strong. Yours and Gohan's is more of a brotherly bond to him, so don't be surprised if he does this with you. I should warn both of you, when it does don't wake him up. If you do, it changes drastically; he'll consider you his worst enemy. Just let it happen and everything will be fine."

Trunks gingerly sat on the end of the bed and picked up a piece of the shell, trying to break it. "What is this made of? I can barely bend it."

That brought everyone closer, attempting the impossible, Bulma even tried bracing it against the floor. Zandre giggled as she took the piece from Gohan. The white light of her ki energy formed around her hand and moved into the shell, shattering it in her hand. "I don't quite understand it all, but the density of it's connected to little brother's mind and ki."

"Do you mind if I test this out Zandre? Is it okay if I take the shell?" Bulma asked, intrigued.

"No go ahead, little brother doesn't need it anymore. Do whatever you want," she replied, stifling a yawn.

"You should rest Zandre-san. What with the babies and all," Ox said, turning to leave.

"He needs a name. We can't keep calling him little brother," Trunks said, unwilling to move.

Zandre hovered a little, turning to face Trunks, "I know he does, but nothing feels right."

"What about sticking with Piccolo?" Gohan asked.

ChiChi finally spoke up, "Oh Kami, don't tell me you'll be raising a mini Piccolo with my grandchild?!? I do not want that thing..."

"He's not a thing, he's a living being. And he doesn't have any of his father's personality. It wouldn't be right," Zandre interrupted, "Besides, I was told not to. I thought I'd leave it to him. If he doesn't have one, we can call him Aiko until he does," she added as she snuggled up with him.

Her stomach rumbling and a child's laughter woke her up. She opened her eyes to find him kneeling at her side, wearing a dark blue dogi she recognized from some photos.

"They're hungrier than you," he said as she sat up, turning to the window.

"Well we slept through lunch," she responded absently before turning to him, "Are you bonded with them too, little one?"

"It's just the brotherly bond as you explained it," he replied, hopping to the floor.

"So you heard huh? What do you think about your name?" she asked, taking his hand and heading for the kitchen.

"I don't have one yet. What does Aiko mean?"

"Little love or beloved," she said, smiling at him.

He stopped, looking her in the eyes, a smile crossing his face, "It'll work."

"Until you find another one," she smiled, squeezing his hand as they started again, "Where did you find those clothes anyway?"

"They were on the end of the bed when I woke up, so I pulled them on," he replied as they walked into the kitchen.

Bulma jumped, turning from filling the sink, "Zandre, we were wondering when you two were going to wake up. I save some supper for both of you," she said as Zandre slipped by, filling a glass.

"Thank you Bulma-san, but not for me," little brother replied as Zandre handed him the tall glass of water.

"I forgot to tell you before, all any Namek needs is water. They don't eat food," Zandre explained as he downed the water. She then turned to Aiko, "little one, why don't you go find Trunks and Gohan? I think they're outside."

He nodded happily as he returned the glass, bowed, and left running. Zandre stood there smiling at his quickly disappearing form. She was soon turned around to find a table full of food awaiting her. It quickly disappeared.

"You've got a Saiyajin appetite," Bulma exclaimed, laughing.

"I could barely eat a fourth of what Gohan does, but trying eating for two quarter Saiyajins and see how dramatic your appetite changes," Zandre replied, the mood suddenly changing.

Bulma took her hand, "Zandre you know he was just shocked. Just have one is a big responsibility, finding out there's two made that bigger and placed more of a need to get rid of the Jinzouninjin on him. That's the only reason he walked out."

She sat there, sorting her feelings, "No Bulma, it's more, so much more."

"What do you mean?" Bulma asked.

Gohan stopped by the outside door as he heard her say, "I'll admit that's part of it. But it's something he had to realize, accept that it could happen before we ever made love. I think he feels like he's burdening me."

"What? Why would he feel like that?"

"He remembers what it was like having a baby around, how an extra pair of hands helps. That's just it. A pair. Gohan doesn't know what he'll be able to do, he feels he's put it all on me, that there's no way he'll be able to help, to take care of them," she replied, her head falling into her arms on the table.

Zandre tried her hardest to keep her tears down, half for Gohan, half for little brother. She slowly raised her head to find Bulma fidgety and nervous, "What is it Bulma? Is he hiding something from me?"

Bulma kept fidgeting as she slowly looked up, "I really shouldn't be telling you this because I'm not sure if it'll work. But Gohan's acting like I could do it already, but I can't and I'm not really sure if I should."

"Bulma, you're babbling," Zandre cut in.

"I know, I know I'm sorry," she sighed, "I guess I should just say it straight out. Gohan's asked me to use what parts of the Jinzouninjin I've got to give him a new arm. I started collecting parts left behind to find some weakness, some way of tracking them, but I never got enough data from it all. Then, a few days after he healed he asked me to see if I could. He's been pressing it, thinking I can since you told him you're pregnant," it all poured forth.

A hand suddenly slammed on the table, leaving a few cracks, "Dammit, it's bad enough he's still hiding his feelings from me, he's hiding his actions too!" Zandre yelled, quickly leaving the same way she came.

Bulma got up, about to go after her when a voice from behind said, "Don't Bulma. She deserves this."

Bulma turned to find Gohan just inside the back door, "Gohan I'm sorry but I felt she should know. How many times have I asked you to tell her?"

"I know it's okay. I just don't know how to explain it, why I even asked," he said, his shoulders falling.

Bulma went to him, turning him to the other door, "I'm not the one you need to explain it to."

Gohan nervously stood there, unsure until a gentle push moved him closer. He wasn't even paying attention to where he was going; he knew the grounds inside and out. He was trying to sort his feelings. As he got to the door, he stopped.

Steadying his nerves, he slowly walked in. The lights were out, some slight movement making him realize she was in bed. He slowly went to the window, keeping his back to her, "So where is he?"

"little brother is staying with Trunks tonight, to establish their bond. Besides, they really hit it off," she said regaining some control of her voice, "I know you heard most of it."

"I'll admit that what you said is true, but that's not all of it. I asked about it before we even made them. I don't know how to explain this. It always felt like part of me was missing. It still does, sometimes. It didn't help how I was being treated. As you helped, as everyone changed, that feeling wasn't as strong, whole weeks go by when I do feel whole, complete. Until I have to do something and I can feel both arms move, I come across some thing that I still can't do." He paused, hearing her roll over, "It all comes back, just as strong as the first time. I'd hide it as best I could, I wouldn't let anyone know. I didn't want those first weeks repeating. More importantly, I didn't want to let you down. I could see it in your eyes, all the pride and happiness that I was overcoming this. I didn't want you to see I'm not as strong as you thought."

She tried to cut in, but he pressed on, turning to face her, "Then that fight happened on one of my bad days. That's part of the reason I was trying so hard, to regain that strength, that confidence. After you healed me, told me about the baby, I realized I had to do something so I wouldn't have these swings, so I asked again. I told Bulma not to tell you until we were sure we could do it. I knew you'd try to talk me out of it, but you've got to understand why I did."

"Gohan, you've shown me how strong you are by admitting how you feel. I can't believe you could forget everything they did and let a part of them become a part of you. I'm amazed you could do that," she replied turning to him.

His gaze fell and he turned back to the window, "I haven't, I don't know if I can. That's where everything you said comes in. Zandre, I remember how much of a handful Trunks was. I felt I'd be able to help with one, even if a little bit. But then, hearing all Mom's tales about me brought up how many doubts. Now finding out there's two, I doubt I can do anything."

Zandre slowly sat up, turning to face him, "Gohan, if I remember right, all the troublesome times were after you guys could walk. We've got time to figure something out, I'm almost two months along, and we've got at least a year until they're walking. Besides, look at all the help we'll have. I doubt we'll be alone with the twins much."

Minutes flew by as they stayed there, the other's words sinking in. Gohan slowly turned to Zandre, finding her lying down again. He went to the bed, kneeling near the head, "Zandre, I'm sorry I didn't tell you. You've helped me with so much already, I should have trusted you'd help again."

She smiled at him, her hands going to his, "It's okay Gohan. I should have realized that it's gonna take time," she paused, her right hand going to his cheek, "We've been through so much, helping each other, we'll make it through this. We're at our strongest together, … all four of us." She finished, placing his hand over her lower stomach.

His eyes went to his hand. A slow sigh of relief and belief was followed by a caring, hopeful smile.


	11. I'll Try Anything

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy

Pt. 11 I'll Try Anything 

A sudden yell of fury pulled all attention to the south. A teenage boy and a twenty-some couple just cleared a ridge. The teen drew the sword from his back and charged into Frieza's henchmen, going Super Saiyajin before the first stroke. The one armed man wearing the familiar orange and blue dogi was about to charge after, when the green-haired woman grabbled his elbow, calling, "No Gohan, let him. He's got to prove himself to the others."

The whole Z team turned to them, amazed as her arms went around his waist. The couple just stood there watching the teen kill every henchman, Frieza, and his father King Cold. The Warriors jumped as another ship landed, relieved when Goku stepped out, amazed at everything happening.

As the teen finished, he sheathed his sword and hung his head, catching his breath as he rejoined the couple. They went to stand in front of the others, the two groups staring, amazed at each other. The teen slipped out of Super Saiyajin, his hair going lavender as he turned to Goku, "Goku-san, it's a honor to meet you sir. If you would please join me, there is something I must tell you."

Goku, to the surprise of everyone, just nodded and followed him, about thirty yards away from them. The others just stood there, staring until Piccolo decided to test them, "Gohan," he said in that 'have-to-respond' tone.

"Yes Piccolo-san," both the young boy in Saiyajin body armor and the one armed young man replied.

Everyone jumped, their eyes going from the younger to the older and back. The two stood there, staring, "Are you really me?" the younger asked.

"Yes. We came from the future to hopefully change it. In our time, you're the only one that survives an enemy you haven't fought yet. Hopefully what Trunks is telling Dad..."

"That's Gohan!!!" Goku's exclamation cuts in.

"...will change our lives or at least prevent it from becoming yours," the older Gohan finished.

The younger's eyes went from the elder's face to his left shoulder, Chibi Gohan's hand flexing as a reminder it's still there. Mirai Gohan knelt a few feet from him; smiling slightly, "Go ahead. It's alright."

Chibi Gohan came close enough, looking in his eyes, "Did it hurt much?"

The elder's smile faded as the woman came up behind, placing her hand on that shoulder, "No, but I almost lost something more important," he replied, his hand going to hers.

The younger Gohan looked up at her and she smiled caringly at him. He tried to smile back, pushing back his fear as he reached out, touching the empty shoulder. As soon as he realized that 'his' left arm was really gone, his right hand automatically went to his own left shoulder, confirming it was still there. The elder's hand took the younger's left hand and his attention, "Hopefully it won't happen to you."

Mirai Gohan stood as Trunks returned with Goku looking amazed. Chibi Gohan stepped aside as his father stood in front of his 'future self'. Goku kept looking back and forth between the two, especially the left shoulder. As Goku turned back to him, the older said, "It's like I told him, hopefully what we've done will prevent it from happening to him," he nodded toward his younger self.

Goku's hand went to his left shoulder, giving a gentle squeeze; "In case I never told you in your time, I love you Gohan. And after seeing you like this I'm very proud of you my son," Goku said, hugging him.

"I love you too," he replied as they pulled apart.

Goku smiled then turned to the young woman. "Take good care of them Zandre," he said, hugging her as well.

She looked at Tienshinhan and Chaotzu over his shoulder as she replied, "I will Goku-san, I will."

Goku pulled away, going to Chibi Gohan, placing a hand on his shoulder, "If you grew up this well without me, I wonder how he'll turn out with me."

That of course, made everyone jump, the older Gohan only laughed and turned to his younger self, "Just don't let Mom turn you into a nerd, okay," the younger only smiled.

As Krillin, Bulma, and Yamcha all questioned Gohan about the future, Zandre turned to find Trunks trying to stare-down Vegeta. She turned to Tien and Chaotzu and sent only one thought across, _'East Capital Papa.'_ A touch of happiness and relief entered his eyes as Chaotzu tried to contain his joy.

Soon everyone pulled back, leaving Piccolo standing in front of Mirai Gohan and Zandre. They just stood there, staring, emotions and memories passing between them. Slowly Piccolo reached out, placing a hand on Gohan's left shoulder, "Too bad you're not the son I take you for kid, or that arm would have come back years ago."

Everyone stood there in shock, especially both Gohans, at Piccolo admitting his feelings. Piccolo then turned his gaze from Gohan to Zandre and said, "Take care of them both for me," and as she nodded, he took off.

The others all came up, saying their good-byes until the only one left was Vegeta, who was still staring at Trunks. As Zandre slowly approached, Vegeta turned to her, barely nodded, and abruptly left. Trunks was about to call out, to follow as Zandre said, "Don't Trunks. Maybe next time, okay?" taking his hand.

He only nodded as all three headed for the time machine.


	12. There's No Protection

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy

Pt. 12 There's No Protection 

"I can't believe you talked me into this!" Gohan said as they landed in the badlands.

"I can't believe you gave in to her," Trunks joked, dodging behind Zandre to escape Gohan.

"What I can't believe is I gave in to spending the last five months of the pregnancy at Capsule Corp. And if you don't go through with this I won't leave the cliff until they're two," Zandre added playfully, smiling at Gohan's mock anger.

"Besides Gohan, this will give you a chance to see her add her ki to mine. And it's not like we're actually gonna fight with her," Trunks said, getting serious.

Gohan sighed, agreeing, "You're right Trunks. I want to know how you hide your ki so well too Zandre. But first things first," he paused, pointing at a large boulder a few hundred yards away, "Give that rock your strongest blast."

Zandre came to Gohan's side, her right arm straight out, hand fisted with the familiar white aura of her ki. The blast suddenly streamed from her hand and incinerated the boulder. Before either demi-Saiyajin could respond, she was propelled backwards into the cliff. They turned to find 17 trying to force Zandre deeper into the crater they formed. Trunks was ready to blast him until Gohan called out, "You'll hit her too!"

They rushed to them, only to have 17 forced past them with the same white ki energy. 17 shook the beam not far away and turning to the guys, screamed, "You took her away from me so I'm taking her away from you!" and streamed past.

"Zandre! NOOO!!!!" Gohan yelled, following, watching as she was beaten further into the cliff.

His anger manifested as he landed, going Super Saiyajin. He rushed to them, grabbing 17's feet and throwing him over his head as hard as he could, counting on Trunks to keep him busy as he checked on Zandre. She slid out of the crater, landing with a groan. He realized she was fighting it. "Zandre, go ahead and heal yourself. We can handle him."

"No….can't chance it. I can't let him... know. Don't worry... the twins are fine. Now go," she replied, trying to push him away.

He reluctantly joined Trunks, attacking 17 from behind. They all suddenly jumped apart when she remembered, _'Combine your most powerful blasts guys. It worked on her,'_ sending the thought to both.

Trunks and Gohan nodded over 17, both of them moving to place themselves between him and Zandre. She turned her attention to her hands as she heard them call out their blasts. A bright flare of light and 17 screaming in pain was quickly followed by Gohan's roar, "Nimbus!" The cloud stopped in front of her as both of them tried to help her on. As soon as she felt it beneath her, she turned to find Gohan sitting next to her. "It's okay Zandre. He's gone. They're gone for good! It's over. Go to sleep."

_She was standing outside the forest around Gohan's home. She slowly knelt, pulling her children close to her, "You two remember what we told you, that they kind of are and kind of aren't your grandparents," they both nodded at her, "And don't be surprised if there isn't another Taka and Nozomi around, okay?"_

_They nodded again, saying, "Okay."_

_She rose, taking their hands again as they headed to the house. As they neared the well, ChiChi's voice could be heard bellowing out of the house, "What are you talking about Goku? It's not possi..." she stopped as they both came out the door, staring._

_Zandre took a deep breath, "We're from the future, the one Mirai Trunks comes from. Today is these two's fourth birthday and they wanted to meet their grandparents."_

_Goku smiled and knelt, calling to them, "Well, come say hello to your grandpa."_

_They both looked up at her and she smiled and nodded. They slowly approached him, bowed, and then threw themselves on him, knocking Goku to the ground. ChiChi approached Zandre as Goku and her twins started a tickle fight. "They told me about your time, your Gohan. Where is he?" ChiChi asked._

_"He had to stay behind," was all she would say._

_The feel of four kis approaching brought an end to the fight. The twins retreated to their mother, who'd knelt to clean them up. Goku stood, a solemn look on his face, as ChiChi slowly got anxious. The four kis landed behind Goku and ChiChi, close enough that Zandre couldn't see them from her position._

_"Thanks for waiting Gohan," an unfamiliar voice mumbled._

_"Mom, Dad, what is it? Aren't you happy to see us?" a familiar voice said._

_They parted and Zandre looked up to see Gohan standing there in shock, about to drop his set, a three-year-old on each arm. Her set clung to her, scared of this strange version of their Daddy. She slowly stood, picking up Taka as Nozomi's arms latched around her leg. Gohan almost dropped his, until a young man, a teenager, came around from behind and took his green-haired little girl from him, saying, "Geesh Gohan, what are you think..." got left hanging as he turned to the others._

_Gohan set his son, a spitting image of his father, down and his set clung to his legs, the only word he could think coming out, "How?"_

_"We're from the future, the one Mirai Trunks is from. It's their fourth birthday and they wanted to meet their grandparents," she replied calmly._

_Nozomi got up the nerve to ask, "Where's the other you Mommy?"_

_The other adults flinched as Gohan's children looked at her in wonder. His little girl looked at him, then to Nozomi, "Ours died after we were born."_

_Zandre's eyes darted up in time to see Gohan's pain and anguish flash across his face, determined to stay strong for his twins. She set Taka down and detached Nozomi before she turned to him, "We can leave if it's too painful..."_

_"No, don't. It'll give these two a chance to know some version of their mother," he replied, taking a step closer, his still hanging on each leg._

_His looked back and forth between them and they slowly let go of their daddy's legs. His set then went to hers, standing in front of each other, amazed the only differences were their hair and ages. The group of them suddenly giggled, running off into the forest._

_"Could we go and talk?" Gohan barely whispered._

_Zandre nodded, taking his left hand and started off after the children. Gohan wondered why, then suddenly remembered years ago, that first visit, knowing hers lost that arm. She stopped as they got close enough to hear the children, pulling away and leaning on a tree, "So why?"_

_"It's gonna sound weird and I know your lives were different, but I ...I need to know it's really you... Zandre," he replied fidgeting._

_"I understand. If it were me, I'd feel the same way. What do you want me to do? What do you want to know?" she replied, turning her back to him._

_She jumped a little as he slipped up behind her, smelling her hair, "What can I ask? Any question about us won't have the same answer. I can only think of one, what did you and your mother do after the Saiyajins killed your father?"_

_"We left the monastery. I told her he said to come here, but she went to East Capital because she didn't want to explain me. She became a housekeeper," she stopped._

_His hands went to her shoulders, his voice in her ear, "It's you. You look like her, smell like her, lived part of you life like her," he turned her around, a pleading look in his eyes as he inched closer, pressing his lips to hers, "You even feel like her."_

_Zandre gently pulled away, taking his hands in hers, "But I'm not her, not completely. I'm different in as many ways as I'm similar. You've got to understand that Gohan." _

_He sighed, nodding slowly as the girls rushed up to her, pulling her away._

"... I'm not her. Not completely... I'm different in as... I'm similar. You've got to... Gohan," Zandre mumbled in her healing sleep. Gohan, Trunks, Bulma, and little brother all gathered around her.

"I don't understand it myself, all I know is you can't wake her when she's healing," Gohan said.

"But what she's saying doesn't make sense. What if something's wrong?" Bulma asked.

"She should have woken up when it moved to another one right?" Trunks asked, confused.

"Yes she should, and I don't know why she didn't," Gohan replied, frustrated as he sat in the chair.

little brother turned from her to the others, "It's nothing to worry about, she's dreaming."

"Can you tell us why, what it's about?"

"No, I'm not that good, she can when she wakes up though," he replied, curling up next to her in the bed.

"I guess we wait. Come on Trunks, let me check you over," Bulma replied, placing a reassuring hand on Gohan's shoulder.

_They were all around the table, everyone. Gohan and Zandre sat on opposite sides, their twins in their laps. The grandparents on the others as everyone started asking questions, "Why did you come again? Where are the others?"_

_Before Zandre could reply, her twins spoke up, "Daddy stayed home with the baby."_

_Everyone turned to Gohan to see the pain fill his eyes along with the confusion, "But how could he...?"_

_"Without his arm you mean. He's got plenty of help, but we figured out a way. It's using your ki, a little like flying. He's gotten so good he barely realizes he's doing it and it uses such a small amount of power you can barely feel it," she finished as both sets of twins started laughing. Two of the napkins were dancing around the table, "Taka, Nozomi, what did I tell you?" Zandre said sternly._

_The napkins suddenly fell flat on the table. "Sorry Mama," they chorused, surprising everyone._

_"It's okay," Zandre replied, hugging them before she put them down, watching as they ran to 'her' parents. She smiled at them as she continued, "As to why we came, it's their fourth birthday and they wanted to meet their grandparents. It didn't help that Trunks told them about how he got to know his father," Zandre turned to both of them, amazed at the pride on Vegeta's face._

_The day flew by; Zandre and her set spending time alone with 'Papa and Mama', Goku and ChiChi, and lastly Gohan and his twins. She spent hours with his in her lap, telling them stories, answering what questions she could, giving them some sense of their mother._

_As the day grew short, the 'family' headed outside. Gohan and Zandre laughed as their children ran off ahead of them, trying to get in one more game before they lost their other. A hand on hers made Zandre stop, turning to him as he said, "I'm sorry about earlier. I guess I'm not over you... her yet. It's getting harder to now that Zandre's looking so much more like her mother," tears trickled down his face._

_"I'm sorry too. I should have checked things over before I brought them here. But you've got two wonderful children and a whole group of family and friends to help you through it. And you will, if you're anything like mine," she replied, a hand wiping away his tears._

_"No, I'm glad you came. It was helpful to all of us, especially if your life was like Mirai Trunks told us. That's why it was you, right?" he tried to smile._

_"Yes, he said I could learn more about my father too," she admitted, "Anyway, we've got to go. The others will be worried." Zandre turned away, about the call for the children when he stopped her._

_"Could you possibly try to..." he stopped, embarrassed he asked._

_She turned back to him, asking, "Exactly how did she die?"_

_Gohan sighed, turning away, "We had just defeated Majin Buu. She'd been healing everyone as the fight wore on. When it was finished, she tried to come to me, but she was in labor. There was a complication and she was too weak... she couldn't... she told me to... raise them well and... tell them about her... that she loves them..."_

_"...and that she loves you and knows you're strong enough to go on without her," Zandre finished, touching his back, "Gohan, you are. They are terrific children and they know their mother loves them. But they need to know that their father needs them as much as they need him."_

_"More, so much more," he said as he watched all four walk to them, hand in hand._

_The twins went to the other's parent, hugging tight and saying good-byes. They returned to their parent, Zandre's running off to the time machine. Zandre knelt in front of Gohan's, "I might not be your real Momma and I have my own, but I love you as if I were. I hope you know your real Momma loves you more than I do."_

_Gohan's jumped into her arms again; overjoyed some version of their mother loves them. Zandre slowly rose, holding both and handed them to their daddy. She reached in her pocket, pulling out a strange contraption, "Bulma rigged this up, she never tested it though. It's supposed to work like a phone, a beeper, or something like that. You can use it whenever, if your Bulma doesn't make a time machine," she said, slipping it in his pocket._

_They stood there for a few minutes, lost in each other's eyes, their pain. Gohan barely asked, "What about my question?"_

_Zandre turned to his twins, worrying about how to word it, "Remember when we tried, what it did Gohan. But remember what I told you earlier too. Remember for them," she replied, stroking the twins' backs._

_He nodded solemnly as she turned and walked away._

"Gohan," made him jump, almost dropping little brother.

"...real Momma loves you more than I..." Zandre mumbled, still healing.

"Gohan, come on, it's your turn," Bulma said as Trunks took little brother from him.

Gohan reluctantly agreed, joining Bulma at the exam table across for the end of the bed. He peeled off his shirt as she started examining, bandaging.

"...supposed to work like a ... whenever you want..." Zandre continued.

"I wonder if this means anything," Bulma pondered.

"What do you mean?"

"No offense Gohan, but your mate is full of surprises," she stated.

"Yeah," he agreed, then turned to her, confused, "mate?"

"That's what Vegeta always called me, and it was more heartfelt and more permanent than being his wife ever could be," she paused, glancing at both, "Besides, you two are even more in sync than we were, than even your parents were."

Gohan got lost in the memories, "Yeah, but half the time it felt like she was raising Dad too," he replied, both started laughing.

Zandre opened her eyes to see Trunks and little brother cuddled in sleep, overhearing the end of the conversation. She tried to stay still, go back to sleep, but Gohan noticed, "Zandre, are you okay?"

"Fine, just tired, why?" she asked as he sat on the bedside.

"You kept mumbling in your sleep and you never woke up," Bulma said.

"I had a weird dream," she said, her hand going to her stomach, "It was their fourth birthday and we went to the other timeline cause they wanted to meet their grandparents."

"Were we all there?" Gohan asked.

"No, it was just the three of us. I found out later you stayed with the baby. But all the other things I saw, found out. You had a brother Gohan, a year younger than Trunks. And Bulma you had a little girl too, she was a year older than his set," she stopped.

"His set?" they both asked.

"Yes, that me died having these two. I gave birth after healing everyone from a fight with something called Majin Buu. But, oh Gohan they were asking how you could care for the baby and I explained it as redirecting flying, picking up something else, not you. It could work. I told them you were so good and so used to it, they could barely tell and you don't even realize you're doing it. Even our set was doing it in the dream," she exclaimed, taking his hand.

Gohan stared at her, lost in the notion, mumbling, "They really did."

Zandre nodded at him, smiling as Bulma asked, "But why did you have it when you were healing? Has it happened before?"

Getting lost in the thought, Zandre turned to Bulma, "I did once before, years ago, but I can't remember why, what it meant."

Bulma looked at them both, lost in their thoughts and shrugged, "It's probably just your fears about having them coming across in your dream."

That pulled Gohan out of his thoughts, concerned, "Zandre... is it true?"

Zandre was reluctant to respond, the silence cueing Bulma into pulling Trunks and little brother's chair out of the room. As the door silently closed, she answered, "Gohan, I guess you could say it's all the usual fears; if I survive, if we loose one or both, if I'll be a good mother. But ... it's more. What with both of us being half human, we've got no idea how they are going to turn out, I'm scared of that."

He placed his hand on her cheek, "I never really thought of it, since we found out they've got the Saiyajin tails. But I realize why you are and I'm scared for them too. But we'll deal with it together," he paused, still seeing some of the fear, "What did they look like in you dream?" he asked, joining her in the bed.

"Oh, well... Taka looked like you did only his hair was my green color, except for an area in the front, that was black," she replied, sliding from her fears to her dream.

"Taka?" Gohan cut in, "Our son was named Taka."

Zandre looked him in the eye, smiling, "It does mean honor. And besides, you can't decide which one to name him after, you can honor them all."

He chuckled, "You're right, besides I named our daughter, it's only right I let you name our son. What did Nozomi look like? A miniature of her mother?"

Zandre replied with a yawn, "Yes but she had your black hair color, oh and the tail," she fell asleep.

Gohan laid there for hours, content in the knowledge his foes, his old life was dead and his love, his 'mate', his family, his new life was with him. Somewhere, deep down, he knew it always would be.

"I hope your dream comes true my love. Just the good for us, in both timelines," he mumbled before he fell asleep.


	13. I'd Be So Defenseless

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy

Pt. 13 I'd Be So Defenseless 

Author's Note: This is just to say I have wanted to do this ever since I saw her, more so when the new epis aired. I am sorry but she is just so annoying and I don't know why they take it from her. But..., she is my fav character's mother, so... I gave her a decent one. (nodding head in disbelief, "I still can't believe I did this!")

* * *

"Gohan come on! They invited us for a reason," Zandre said, turning back to him as they stood on the outskirts of the Cherryhill village.

"He's always been shy about getting thanks Zandre," Aiko said, holding tight to her hand, a little nervous himself.

Gohan jumped at his remark, almost forgetting Aiko has all of Piccolo's memories, "It's not that little brother. It's the fact that we've lost so much... I took so much time..."

Zandre stroked his cheek, her eyes filled with concern but a small smile played across her face, "Don't tell me all that's coming back again. There was no way you could have prevented any of that Gohan. They knew the risk; they all had their own reasons to fight them. They don't blame you, stop blaming yourself," she said, kissing him.

A slow sigh escaped his lips as they pulled apart. Gohan slowly stood tall and proud, "As always you bring me back up," he said, taking Aiko's other hand as they headed into town.

The entire village was gathered in the square, every available table and a few makeshift ones covered with food. The adults were running around, bringing more food, lighting the paper lanterns strewn all around. As soon as the children saw her, they moved in one large mass toward Zandre.

"Wow you came with Son Gohan and Aiko!"

"Zandre, Zandre will you read my book?"

"No, she's reading mine!"

"She's not reading anybody's! Remember my Papa's got fireworks!"

"YEAH!" "Yeah fireworks!"

"Zandre can we..." got drowned out as they all started asking and planning things to do with Aiko.

"If you want to..." she paused as they all fell quiet at the sound of her voice, "... show him anything, you've got to ask him."

A small, cat-like girl, probably four or five, came up to him, "Who are you?"

Aiko looked at her, then turned to Zandre who knelt beside him, "For all of you that haven't met him, this is Aiko. He was orphaned like some of you, that's why he lives with me. He's kinda shy when he's around a lot of strangers, so I want you guys to be his friends or no books for a month," she pause, turning to him, "You'll tell me if they're mean to you, right?"

He stared, just as shocked as the kids. She winked at him and he had to suppress the giggles as he nodded slowly. The little girl came and took his hand, smiling. They started running away, the whole group yelling about all the stuff to show him.

Zandre stood slowly, wrapping her arms around herself, smiling at the sight. Gohan's familiar form pressed against her back, his arm joining hers, his chin resting in her hair. A sudden huff to the back of her head made her turn to him, "What?"

A small smile and a far-off look in his eyes gave her a tiny hint. He turned to her and said, "I was just wondering what Piccolo would think of that."

"There's a thought!" she replied as she hugged him.

A chuckle shook his body, "Yeah, that'll drive you crazy."

They turned, about to go help the adults when a small bunch of the kids came running back, screaming for help. On instinct ingrained through years of fear, everyone ran to them, following them into the forests. "What happened?" Zandre asked them as they got close enough to hear the others screaming.

"Ryo fell out of a tree and broke his leg," all three replied.

The adults came to the tree, parents scooping up their children. Zandre stopped, watching as Aiko finished healing a ten-year-old boy. She went over, kneeling on Ryo's other side, "What did I tell you Aiko?" she admonished.

The little Namek clasped his hands behind his back and said, "Not unless you say it's okay."

Zandre placed her hands on Ryo's leg, her healing encompassing her hands as she checked him over, "But Zandre, it hurt a whole lot and he was just being nice," Ryo stated as she finished her check-up.

"It's not like that. He doesn't know everything yet Ryo. But he fixed your leg perfectly," she replied as they got up.

Ryo's father pushed through the crowd, pulling his son behind him, huffing angrily, "You get that alien freak away from my son! He's just like that evil Piccolo creature. Get him out of this village!" the other parents, realizing it's truth agreeing.

She felt Aiko cling tightly to her leg as Gohan stepped between them, "Piccolo was once an evil man, but he changed. He was the one who taught me how to fight! If it weren't for Aiko's FATHER, you'd all be dead! He was a great man and my best friend, if any of you have anything against him or LITTLE BROTHER here," he swung his hand toward Aiko, stopping as Zandre took his hand.

She bent down and picked him up, letting him cry into her shoulder as she said, "It's true his father was an alien, but so was mine and Gohan's. Our fathers being aliens is what allows us to help, healing or fighting. If you can't accept him then you can't accept us. And until you can, don't expect much out of me," she paused, turning to Gohan, "Let's go home, we're not welcome here."

He turned back to the crowd and nodded curtly before gently stroking Aiko's back. The little Namek's head turned toward him, a small smile crossing his face. They turned and left the villagers speechless as they left the forests. Suddenly they could hear all the children calling out to them.

Zandre and Gohan stopped on the edge of town as the kids crowded around them again. "Wait, we want to come with you," they all cried out.

Gohan turned to Zandre to find a caring smile crossing her face, "No, you can't guys. You have to stay to make your parents understand, okay?"

He smiled as they groaned and grumbled their understanding. "If you really want to, go hide for a while, it always helped me..." his explanation got cut off as they sensed someone approaching by air.

Trunks suddenly appeared above them, a solemn look on his face. Gohan joined him, anxious, "What is it Trunks? What's happened?"

He couldn't look at Gohan, so he turned to Zandre as she hovered up to them, the pain so clear on his face. She slowly sensed the problem, "Let's go to your house Gohan."

"What's going on? It's not..." he left it hanging, turning from one to another before he took off.

Trunks and Zandre quickly followed.

They landed beside the well to find Bulma slowly approaching them, her head hung. Gohan ran toward the door, stopping as a form slowly came through. "Thank Kami! Grandpa, I thought that...why ... no, oh Kami NO!" he almost yelled as he ran into the house.

Zandre handed Aiko over to Trunks before following Gohan, stopping long enough to hug Ox-King, consoling him briefly. She slowly went to the bedrooms, hearing Gohan's muffled crying. She paused in the doorway, giving him some time alone with his grief.

"I don't know what happened, she said she was going to take a nap. When I realized she hadn't started supper when she always did, I came to check on her and she was..." Ox whispered from behind her.

Zandre went in further to find ChiChi lying too still on the bed, what she could only guess as one of Goku's shirts clenched in her hands. Gohan was kneeling at the far side, arm on the edge, crying into it. Zandre slowly approached, stopping right beside him, watching him overcome with his grief.

After a few minutes, he jumped, suddenly realizing she was there. He turned to her, pulling her closer, "Zandre, you've gotta save her. You gotta help," he pleaded as he made her sit on the edge.

"Gohan, I can't. There's nothing I can do," she said, trying to console him.

He caught both of her hands in his, placing them over his mother's heart, "Zandre, help her," he begged, looking into her eyes.

She turned away, not being able to stand to see so much pain on his face. _'I can't help her Gohan. But I can help you and Ox.'_ She thought as her hands started glowing. Zandre tried to make it cross into ChiChi's body, but it would only show her inner workings. She searched everywhere, not finding a reason why.

"Gohan I can't. She just passed away. There's no signs on any reason why she died. She's gone Gohan. She's with your father now," Zandre said, turning him to face her.

For an instant she suddenly saw him at four, taken away from all her knew and loved. She slowly pulled him close, placing his head in her lap. He just sat there, staring into space as she slowly stroked her head and back.

A large presence beside her made her turn to him. He slowly nodded and said, "I never thought I'd outlive my child. She was all I had," staring at her peaceful face.

Zandre forced a smile as she took his big hand, "No. You've got us," she said.

He tried to smile back as the tears started flowing. He came and knelt in front of her, coming into Gohan's view. "Grandpa"

Grandfather and grandson encircled each other in a hug, their love and grief for a lost daughter and mother connecting them. Zandre stood, about to leave them with their pain and memories, when they pulled her close within, Gohan pressing his head to her stomach. She stood there, consoling them with her presence, her caresses, and her silent tears.


	14. Tender In A World So Tough

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy

Pt. 14 Tender In A World So Tough 

"Zandre. Zandre, where are you?" Bulma's calling pulled her awake.

"Over here Bulma. Not so loud, he's still asleep," she replied, her hand moving from her slowly expanding stomach to little brother's sleeping head pillowed on her knee.

Bulma walked around the bushes to find Zandre leaning against a tree, "Why is he so tired anyway?" she asked as she sat on Zandre's other side.

"He's trying too hard to learn everything as fast as he can. It doesn't help that your son is trying to train him so he can do everything I can," Zandre replied, reaching for the sketchpad between them.

Bulma picked it up, about to hand it over when she realized part of the picture looked familiar, "This one looks like... Is this..?"

"Yes, it's these two," she replied, stroking her stomach, "Or at least how they looked in the dream. I can't shake this feeling that it means something. I thought that maybe if I drew them I could shake it, but it still there."

Both women sat in silence, trying to reason an answer when Zandre suddenly started giggling. She blushed furiously as Bulma asked, "What's so funny?"

"I... I just remembered... the night we..." she paused, "I probably shouldn't."

"Aahh, you can't build me up then stop. Come on, tell," Bulma joked, prodding.

"Well, not all the details. Anyway, as we... we started hovering."

"That's fun."

"As it hit, he turned Super Saiyajin."

"Oh, that's even better!"

"So it does happen a lot. Anyway, as soon as it was done, he reverted back and we flopped on the couch, laughing," Zandre finished.

Bulma seemed lost, remembering, "He always had something new to try. I still wonder though..."

"About what?"

She shook herself back to the present, "Vegeta always tried to convince me into flying and..."

"Oh you should have, you should have Bulma! It's like a whole night rolled into one time!" Zandre exclaimed, almost waking little brother.

Bulma fought her way out of her memories, her fantasies and said, "You sure know how to torture a person."

"Hey you brought it up! You had to know!" Zandre joked, suddenly getting serious as little brother sat up, worried.

"What is it Zandre? What's going on?" Bulma asked, concerned as she helped Zandre up.

"I thought they were just sparring," she mumbled, catching herself at Bulma's gasp, "I'm not sure Bulma, but Trunks is barely conscious and Gohan's slipping. You take Aiko and bring the airvan. I'll go on ahead and see what I can do," Zandre replied as she started flying away.

"Please be careful, I don't want to explain to Gohan why you got hurt too," Bulma called to her retreating form, knowing nothing she could say or do would stop Zandre.

(Present/Normal Timeline)

"Sure you guys can use the gravity chamber, but Vegeta gets furious when he's interrupted, so be careful," Bulma said as she lead Goku and Gohan to the room.

"Thanks for the use and the warning Bulma," Goku said, father and son both stopping and scanning the sky.

"Tien, Chaotzu, nice to see you guys," Goku said as they landed a few feet away.

"Why did you guys come here? You want to use the gravity chamber too," Bulma asked.

They looked at each other briefly before Tien turned to them, "No, but we were..." was cut off by a loud boom and a flash of light across the Capsule Corps. Compound. They ran toward the source, amazed to find Vegeta standing there stunned in front of a giant spider-like vehicle. The dome on the top suddenly lifted, turning to the back and a being stood, trying to see through the settling dust cloud.

Vegeta, ready to attack, started hovering to the top of the vehicle as Goku called out, "Vegeta get back here. We have no idea what this is."

"Kakarotto, I was going to attack before it had a chance to respond," Vegeta yelled.

"Vegeta, Goku. I made it, thank Kami! We don't have much time. We have to get back," a voice called out from the vehicle.

A sudden breeze cleared the area, showing everyone who was there. "Zandre," Goku called.

"Yes, I came again. We don't have much time, an alien has shown up and says he's gonna take the halflings alive or dead. Gohan and Trunks both fought him off for a while, but they need help."

"Why?" Goku asked, concerned for that son.

"Gohan's barely alive and Trunks is barely awake. I did what was needed and came to get help. So who's coming?" Zandre said, her chair lifting to reveal the extra seats.

"I'm going," Goku called.

"Me too," Tien said as Chaotzu nodded at him.

"I'm going," Gohan added.

"NO!" three voices said in unison. Piccolo slowly lowered into view, "You're staying here Gohan. You'd just be another target for him."

"He's right Gohan. This maniac said he wants the halflings so he can rebuild Frieza's empire. He'd go after you too, or use you against your father," Zandre said, turning to the others.

"Let's go," Goku said, hovering up to Zandre and Piccolo, followed by Tien.

Zandre turning to Vegeta, "There's room for one more."

Vegeta sent a cursory glance to Bulma before saying, "There's no way I'm letting you get this one Kakarotto!"

Zandre smiled, winking at Bulma as Vegeta joined them.

(Back in Mirai/usual storyline)

Another boom and flash of light and the dome and Zandre's seat were moving. She stood and slowly lowered herself out, saying, "So how are they Bulma?"

"The same as they were. They can't heal completely in the five minutes you were gone," she replied, making three of them jump.

As they got out, Bulma stood in the doorway with her back to them, calling down the hall, "So who did you bring back?"

"Bulma?!?" Goku uttered, amazed.

She slowly turned, her hands going for the doorframe, shocked to find four long dead friends standing there, almost as old as the last time she saw each. As the shock wore off and her mind kicked in, she chuckled briefly and called down the hall, "So you brought the fathers with you."

Tien got a little nervous as she started down the hall, waving for them to follow. They entered a room to find Trunks sitting up in a bed; Zandre bent over Gohan in another, her hands and his chest glowing green.

Gohan slowly groaned and tried to sit up, being stopped by Zandre. He took one of her hands in his and said, "Just stop the bleeding Zandre. We don't have the time and you don't have the strength."

She was about to protest, when she realized its truth and the true extent of his injuries. As she finished, he sat up, his hand absently stroking her stomach. Gohan got up and stood beside Zandre, her back still to the others and looked at them, "Zandre, why did you bring them here?"

"Gohan, you need the help. If this maniac can do everything Trunks said, you two won't last long," she replied, stroking his cheek.

Gohan sighed loudly, "You're right. I'd hate to find out what he'd do if he found out about the rest of you," he replied, pulling her close.

Zandre turned around, Gohan's arm still around her as Goku asked, "What do you mean Gohan?"

Zandre turned to Gohan, smiling as his hand slid from her shoulder to her waist, revealing her condition and said, "You guys are gonna be grandpas, sort of."

Zandre turned to her father, her smile turning to confusion as Goku said, "Guys?"

Her eyes never left her father's as she said, "I told you where... you still haven't Papa?"

Tien stared at her as the others tried to understand what they'd just been told, Gohan answering what he could. Tien's face stayed stern and unreadable, but Zandre could sense all the pain, fear, and doubt he still carried about their situation. She turned away and left the room, Gohan, Bulma, Trunks, and the others following.

Tien slowly followed the others, overhearing Gohan ask, "Where is..?"

"With your grandfather," she replied, glancing at Piccolo.

Piccolo's brow furrowed at their words as he asked, "Okay kid, what's up here?"

Gohan turned into the living room, sitting on the arm of the couch, Zandre staying at his side as he replied, "I'm not exactly sure Piccolo. Trunks and I were helping with some rebuilding across town when some of the kids came running to us. They said this monster suddenly appeared asking where are the halflings."

"They lead us to him and he said he was taking the halflings, alive or dead. We fought him off, but all those trick attacks he did overpowered us. He pulled back and set a pack of robots on us, thinking he had us and left. We got rid of half of them when Zandre showed up and helped," Trunks finished.

"If you want to call taking care of two helping, but you guys really needed us afterward. I just wonder if he knows..." Zandre said, turning to Bulma.

"That they're still alive, that should be obvious," Goku questioned.

Vegeta slapped him upside the head, "No you idiot! That he's found out about her, what she can do!!!"

Gohan's face fell as that sunk in, his arm going around her waist as the next thought bobbed up, coming out in a whisper, "About the twins!"

An alarm system suddenly going off stopped all questions as Trunks and Bulma went to a computer within the far wall. "There's about two dozen of those robots coming this way," Bulma stated.

"From the north, and it looks like he's with them," Trunks added.

Gohan stood, turning to Zandre as she said, "Go, stop them, I'll stay here where it's safe."

"But if he knows... he'll try..."

"Then keep that in mind, use it," Zandre said, walking him to the door.

Piccolo turned to Goku, "She really does know him."

She smiled at them as Gohan hugged her and said, "Don't forget, I'll let you know if he's getting to close. Now go."

He pulled away, seeing only belief, trust, and faith in her eyes. Steeling himself on that alone, Gohan turned and ran outside, the others quickly following. Once all were out, they took off as one.

_"Be careful of those claws, they shoot a power web that's twice your own,"_ Gohan sent the thought to the others.

"So you can't escape on your own," Piccolo said over the rushing wind.

"Yeah, and watch it so you..." Trunks started, getting sucker punched as the crab-like robots started appearing all around them.

A gravelly, echo-like laughter started about thirty yards above them, causing both half-Saiyajins to go Super. "So you got some help? I didn't sense any of them until a few minutes ago," he paused, pushing buttons on his claw, "Oh, I see, time travel! I'll have to get the machine when I retrieve the green-haired female. It was wise of her to stay behind, having little fighting experience and that useful healing ability. As for your help, they're not exactly what I want, but they can still be used."

"What do you mean?" Tien asked.

"Well, Saiyajin blood is very scarce in the universe. And as your companions prove, halflings tend to be stronger. The same hold true for your race Xanthan. That's why the female is so important to my plans, a half-Xanthan carrying quarter Saiyajin children. What power!!!" he replied, patiently explaining.

"Raktho, if you even mention her again. I'll ripe your heart out!!!" Gohan yelled, his anger causing the power to surge around them.

"Then come willingly," he replied.

"No"

"My droids will change your mind," Raktho replied, motioning them to attack.

The droids all took a battle stance, a strange black aura surrounding each. Goku and the others were about to power up, surprised when Gohan and Trunks powered down out of Super Saiyajin.

"They determine your power level and absorb some, especially blasts, when they glow like that. Trunks tried to warn you," Gohan stated before they could ask.

"Very observant," Raktho said as the droids attacked, "Something I'll have to instill in those children."

"That's IT!" Gohan screamed, slipping back into Super Saiyajin, suddenly attacking the large crab-man from behind.

"NO!!" both Trunks and Goku yelled as the droids used their shock, overwhelming both temporarily.

Soon droid parts were everywhere, as each of the fighters powered up, avoiding the power webs. Energy was flying in every direction; avoided, blocked, or destroying a droid. A rage-filled yell caused the remaining six to jet straight up. "Now prepare to join me halfling, while I go get your mate," Raktho said, kicking Gohan to the droids.

"NOOOO!!!!!" he screamed as the six encircled him, firing their power webs. His heart-wrenching, pain-filled scream filled the sky as the webs hit their mark.

"Gohan, NO!!!!" Goku yelled as he headed for the two above him. As he brought his hands together, motion caught out of the corner of his eye told Goku he had help.

"Kame-hame-ha!"

"Beam Cannon Fire!"

All six were obliterated in a flash of light, Goku teleporting to barely stop Gohan from hitting the ground, "Daa... Goku. The teleport. Go save Zandre," Gohan groaned as he was sat on the ground.

He didn't even respond, Goku was gone and suddenly back with Zandre in the space of a heartbeat. Her face fell as she saw the state he was in, "No arguments Gohan. Just stay still so I can make it so you can at least stand," she said, her hands glowing green as she forced him to lay down.

Gohan reluctantly agreed, allowing her healing glow to encompass most of his upper body. She closed her eyes halfway through, opening them slowly as they both rose. Taking a deep breath, Zandre suddenly stopped as Gohan and Trunks turned from each other to her.

"He's realized she's here," Tien guessed.

"He seems surprised by the teleport," Piccolo said as the others honed in on Raktho's position.

"What are you waiting for Kakarotto, get her out of here," Vegeta almost yelled.

"What about your place Zandre? That's just as far in the other direction, it'll keep us between you and him," Trunks suggested, offering the obvious safe haven.

"Okay, just picture it in your mind," Goku said, taking Zandre's hand, his other going to his forehead.

As they suddenly disappeared, Gohan called out, "No wait!!!" then abruptly took off.

The others all followed, Trunks and Piccolo trying to overcome Gohan, "Slow down Gohan. What's wrong?"

"Think about it, if he was asking for the halflings, somebody's bound to have told him about her," Gohan yelled over the wind.

Trunks was suddenly running even with Gohan, "So he's probably got some of those droids at her place. Let's just hope Zandre's realized as much," Trunks said, using his guilt and anger as fuel.

"What the..? Where are we?" Goku said as they reappeared within a circle of trees.

"We remembered that he was asking for the halflings, so I had us come out in the forest behind the house, just in case," Zandre replied, pulling Goku through the trees.

They came upon the small clearing that she used as a back yard, finding two droids guarding the back door and two more flying over the house. Zandre stayed within the forest as Goku stepped into the clearing, all becoming one big blur as the fighting started. Forms suddenly became clear as Goku shot into the air, avoiding two power webs that entangled, destroying their droids. Unfortunately, Goku wasn't watching his back, the two remaining shot their webs, both ensnaring him. Zandre formed a ki shield around the twins as she blasted at the droids, forcing them to drop Goku.

"Zandre... Zandre NOOO!!!" Gohan called, his whole body glowing like a ki blast before he disappeared, stopping everyone.

"So he can teleport too," Vegeta grumbled as he started off, kicking into high gear, pulling everyone back to the situation.

Gohan reappeared to find his fear come true. Two droids forty yards above him with Zandre in their webs being shocked.

"Stop my minions, we don't want to harm them," Raktho's gravelly echo suddenly filled the sky.

"Let them go," Goku called as he tried to stop Gohan. Before he could, Gohan shot up to the droids, ready to tear Zandre free with his bare hands.

"I wouldn't, the webs will adjust to yours, hurting her," Raktho called, stopping Gohan. Two more droids approached, flanking him as the others left with her. "I know you can find her. If you can rescue her within two hours, I will leave all of you and your planet alone. If you cannot, I will take all of you with me, alive or dead. You have two hours to decide their fate and yours," the others heard as they approached.

Goku slowly hovered up to join them, the group hovering behind Gohan, still flanked by the droids.

"You know it's a trap," Vegeta stated the obvious.

"But we've got to save her," Trunks said, staring at Gohan, "Too many people need her."

Goku turned to his 'son', seeing all his pain and said, "Piccolo, Vegeta; you two in front. Trunks, we'll stick with Gohan, hopefully to keep him focused. Tien, you watch our backs. As soon as we free Zandre, you get her out of there. Got it?"

A power surge made everyone turn. The energy formed around his 'arms', his left only a silhouette of energy. It suddenly bursts forth from his 'fists', disintegrating the droids at his sides. "Got it!!" he replied, flying to the north.

"So you're awake already Zandre, is that it? It's earlier than I expected, but then you're proficient in many unusual aspects of ki usage," that gravelly voice pulled Zandre awake.

She sat up slowly, only to find herself in a protected cell, "Growing up in a chaotic world, you train yourself for anything," she calmly replied as she approached him, stopping a couple of feet from the shield wall.

Zandre received what she could only guess was a smirk as the flesh on the left side of his face moved up, revealing more of the dark orange shell that should be his mouth, "Too true. And learning to absorb some of any energy attack is an extremely useful ability. I'll have plenty of time to determine any others. Your friends have less than two hours, if they don't manage to free you, you're all coming with me," Raktho agreed, turning to leave.

"You'll find I'm full of surprises," Zandre called to his back, carefully revealing her true power level.

"What the hell?!?" Vegeta called as everyone but Gohan jumped as a high power suddenly became apparent.

Trunks turned to Gohan, seeing a small amount of relief come to him, "Is it...?"

"It's her. She's trying to help," Gohan said, pulling them along.

He turned to find Tien beside him, barely understanding his mumble, "It's familiar, but so much stronger."

"A lot can change in twenty-four years," Gohan tartly replied, trying to control his anger.

Everyone turned to him, amazed at his complete focus as they followed the mountain range. The claw-like ship was at the end of the range; the claw open with two parallel lines of droids pouring out of the hatch between the pinchers.

Gohan turned his power and pain inward; landing a few hundred feet from the first droids, the others slowly joining him. Fighting to maintain control, Gohan started down the row, when a hand on his shoulder stopped him, "They would have attacked already. Raktho's doing this to test me, to try and get me willingly," Gohan stated, shaking the grip.

"So he's arrived. You'll have to excuse me as I go and retrieve me prize," Raktho's echo called out, waking Zandre.

"No, I've got to get out there. Gohan hang on," she pleaded.

They were almost at the hatch, when that gravelly echoing laughter started behind them. All turned to find Raktho hovering behind them, "Why do we have to fight? I am offering you so much, why do you refuse?"

"I have all I could ever want here," Gohan replied, barely noticing the others circling him, prepared to watch his back.

"No, you DID! I have her and them now. If you don't want them hurt anymore, you'll give up and join me," Raktho calmly replied.

That was it, the energy suddenly burst around him, taking Gohan into Super Saiyajin, "Enough Raktho! WHERE IS SHE?"

"You have to defeat me first boy," he replied.

"Oh Gohan, hold on!! Don't let the anger take control!" she tried to call as she pulled herself down the corridor, hopefully outside.

Raktho caught him off-guard, Gohan swore he heard her trying to call him. He pulled back to regroup, taking a brief glance below to see his 'father' and the others finish the last of the droids. They soon circled Raktho and he realized all had some injury, even Piccolo and Vegeta. "Let them go Raktho. This is between you and me," Gohan called to the crab-man, the others surprised by his words.

"Gohan no, I'm not leaving!" Trunks called from his position between Goku and Vegeta.

That gravelly echoing chuckle returned, "You are right, you are the one I really want. But the others, especially your mate and those children can be as useful to me, so why would I let them leave? Besides I doubt they would even if I offered," Raktho replied.

"Damn right!" Piccolo called as he, Vegeta and Tien all attacked.

Gohan hovered there, observing the fighting; Raktho's movements and the different moves this other group of friends had. A mental touch made him jump, hoping against hope, _'Zandre?'_

_'No, it's me son. Do you see anything we could use?'_ Goku mind-stated, hoping to keep him focused.

_'Not that' _Gohan stated as a small blast bounced off Raktho's shell, wizing past Goku.

_'I see. But look at that,' _Goku replied as Vegeta let his ki manifest around his leg and started kicking between shell plates and a point it was cracked. Raktho stopped momentarily in pain, before throwing Tien into Vegeta, making him stop.

_'Trunks did you...'_ Gohan started.

_'I saw it Gohan,'_ Trunks interrupted, both of them suddenly jumped.

_'What?' _Goku tried to get it out of either.

_'Pull back now!!' _both half-Saiyajins mind-yelled, causing the three to jump and pull back.

Raktho suddenly opened his claw, thrusting it forward, the web suddenly extending, capturing Goku.

"No Goku!!! Hold on guys, I'm coming."

The others all crowded around Raktho, keeping their ki's manifested around their arms and legs, hitting his weak spots. Gohan stopped his attack on Raktho's mid-section as he felt the crab-man react to Trunks punch on his claw arm. Gohan raised his combined 'fists' above his head, pouring all his power into it.

"NNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Raktho yelled in agony as the claw shell cracked, the web retracting.

Gohan turned quickly, expecting to find Goku on the ground, only to find Piccolo supporting him. _'I'll be okay in a few minutes son,'_ Goku's mind-voice whispered in his head.

Gohan turned to Piccolo, who nodded in agreement and understanding, "That's the last straw Raktho! This ends now!!!"

"If you insist."

She finally got outside, slipping from the ship to one of the many piles of broken droids. She stopped as she saw the fight ahead and above her. They were both attacking physically; she sensed Gohan didn't have enough left, Raktho fighting so he could keep Gohan alive. She moved out in the open, about the call out when that power web shot out, capturing Gohan.

"I grow tired of this. You will not come willingly, so you will come with me dead," Raktho said as he sent the power into the web, everyone jumping back as the immense power manifested, it's crackling drowning out Gohan's screams.

"NNNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!" she screamed, and remembering what she 'saw' as they freed Goku, sent her most powerful blast directly into the cracks in the claw.

Raktho screamed in agony as the web opened, dropping Gohan to the ground. Raktho turned to her, the web flailing out of control and still increasing in power, calling out, "YOU!" flinging the webbing at her.

As soon as it contacted, Zandre screamed in pain as the webbing wrapped around her, flinging her into the destroyed droids behind her. Tien, Trunks, and Vegeta were about to attack Raktho from behind when Goku and Piccolo both said, "Don't" not taking their eyes off Gohan.

He was looking in her direction as soon as the blast hit, eyes still on her as he fell. Knowing his love, his children were being hurt pushed his anger over the edge and he started tapping into a power he hadn't for years. The first outburst was almost always the same, a giant push at anything and everything around him, this time pushing him onto his feet. Gohan cupped his 'hands' in front of him, pulling all that extra power into them, yelling, "Here's my answer Raktho!"

The crab-man turned just in time to take the beam in the stomach, the power filling him up, pouring out his other wounds. Gohan balled up all his anger into the rest of the energy, throwing it all at Raktho with no sign of regret.

He fell to his knees, a small part of him happy to send Raktho to the next dimension, a much larger part happy to know his family was safe again. That thought alone made him rush to where she landed, taking off at top speed to Capsule Corp. with her in his 'arms', that strange green glow covering her.

"I though his training would..." Goku muttered.

"It didn't," Piccolo stated, equally dumbfounded as they followed Gohan.

They found him in the infirmary, leaning his head on the narrow strip of wall between the door and observation window, trying hard to control his emotions. They looked through the window to find her lying in bed, Bulma checking her over, her strange green healing glow encompassing her whole body.

"Something's wrong," Tien jumped as the words came out.

"Why, her healing's working. What's wrong?" Trunks asked, turning to Gohan.

He raised his fist, about to pound the wall but stopped, knowing it would only bring the building down on her. "I don't know. It doesn't work like that. She hasn't woken up yet. I can't feel her..." it dangled as he turned to the window, a few stray tears rolling down his cheeks as he stared.

Bulma gently covered her up and joined them. "I don't know what's happened to her. She's covered with minor burns, her body's acting like it's been electrocuted. She's got a slight fracture in her right leg, I'm not sure what happened to her left hand. Most of her ribs and back are bruised and she's got a slight concussion."

"Did she wake up Mom, did she say anything?"

"No, but the twins are just perfect," she replied, placing a caring hand on Gohan's empty shoulder.

"Poor Zandre-san," a new voice added.

Everyone turned to find a grayed version of the large man. "Grandpa, if you're.. then where's...?" Ox just tried to smile as a small hand took Gohan's.

"She will be alright Gohan. You shall see," his soft voice said as everyone turned to him.

Grabbing onto the tiny piece of hope Aiko gave him, Gohan led him to Zandre's bedside, putting him down beside her. "Help her little one, please," his voice wavered.

"No, I can't. She told me never to help her if hers was working this way," Aiko replied as he crawled up to sit by her left shoulder, placing her bad hand in his lap, holding on.

"Why did she say that?" Goku asked as Gohan turned away in anger.

"'cause this just means my healing's weakened," her low whisper made everyone jump.

Gohan spun around to see half-open blue-green eyes smiling at him through her healing glow. He leaned over Aiko and kissed her deeply. As they pulled apart, he rested his forehead on hers, both whispering, "Promised."

Gohan sat in the chair, everyone, even Vegeta staring in shock at the two on the bed. Trunks broke through the silence, "Why's it still...?"

"Cause it's still working, a little. It's also fixin' itself so it keeps goin'" she replied slowly, her whisper slowly getting stronger. "It's happened before, probably take til tomorrow afternoon to finish."

"Why don't you let him help Zandre-san?" Ox asked.

"I don't need it. And we don't know what combining the two would do," she said, taking her hand out of his lap, "'sides he's got others to help," she added, turning to Gohan and Goku, then Aiko, smiling her approval.

The little Namek stood, went to Gohan and asked, "Do you want me to help you?"

Gohan placed his hand on Aiko's shoulder and smiled, "I'd be honored if you would little brother."

Aiko smiled at the show of affection as he placed both hands on Gohan's arm. A golden glow slowly encompassed them, small balls of that light flowing from Aiko to Gohan, concentrating around his injuries. The balls slowly faded as his injuries healed, and as the last one died out, the glow slowly left. "Thank you little one," Gohan said as his hand slid down Aiko's arm.

"You're welcome brother," Aiko replied, bowing before going to Goku. "Do you want me to help you?" he repeated.

Goku stood shocked, "Why do you ask?"

"Zandre asks when she can. And some people aren't used to me yet," he replied with that innocent child-like knowledge, "Can I help?"

"Sure," Goku replied, still uneasy about it. Aiko bowed in respect then placed his hands on Goku's left shoulder he was favoring. The glow and balls reappeared, making Goku better and a little stronger than before. He suddenly felt those two little hands leave his shoulder. "Wow, I feel great! Thank you little one," Goku exclaimed, hugging him.

Zandre looked at both Gohan and Piccolo, seeing a tiny bit of regret and longing peeking through. She smiled and said, "Anyone else?"

The others all declined, not as injured as the Son clan. Aiko innocently shrugged at them and was about to go back to the head of the bed, only to witness Zandre yawn. She smiled at him and said to the others, "If there's no more questions for now, I'll go back to sleep." She shifted so she was on her side, facing Gohan.

"Can I sleep with you Zandre?"

"Sure little one, be careful though," she replied, watching him curl up behind her knees, head resting on her thigh. She reached out, gently stoking his head as he mumbled, half-asleep, "I love you Zandre-chan."

"I love you too, my little love," she replied, stroking him to sleep.

"Are the Nameks still here?" Vegeta asked the only rational explanation coming to him.

Zandre turned her gaze from Aiko to Gohan, who was smiling softly, then Piccolo, "No. He's actually yours."

Everyone stood by in shock, watching as the knowledge slowly sunk into Piccolo. He 'humph'ed lowly, trying to hide his feelings and said, "Makes sense, I guess."

"I've got him 'cause..." she stopped, trying to stifle a yawn.

Gohan gently stroked her cheek, "Go to sleep love. I'll explain it," he said, stroking Aiko's head as she closed her eyes.

She slowly woke up to find Gohan's head pillowed on the bed, his hand lying next to her stomach. She slowly turned to the foot of the bed to find Goku there, smiling at the picture they made. "He's a lucky man," he replied, nodding toward his sleeping 'son', "He found you."

Zandre smiled, turning to run her hand through his hair, "Technically, I found him, but he'd probably agree completely. He's had such a hard life."

"Without his father," Goku said, coming to stand behind Gohan's chair.

"He lost his father, but he always knows how his father feels about him. He knows 'you' love him and are proud of him."

Goku smiled at her words of encouragement, "I hope so."

"I know so," Gohan mumbled as he slowly sat up, turning to his 'father'.

They sat there for a while, all the unspoken feelings passing between the two. Goku broke the connection with a soft chuckle, nodding toward the bed. Gohan spun around to find Zandre asleep again with Aiko asleep in her arms. He smiled softly, "She's helped me with so much...Goku. She's helped me with my guilt, my anger, getting me adjusted to this," his hand floated to his left shoulder, "But the greatest thing she's done is give me a better understanding of you."

"What do you mean 'son'?" Goku asked, trying to instill the connection.

"Well.. 'dad', having someone that special, someone that I know I've got to fight for, survive for, that loves me that completely has made me realize why you always fought so hard, with more than you had. The least I could do is love her as deeply," Gohan replied, rolling his chair up so he could lay his head next to hers.

Goku could only smile, overjoyed to find out this 'son' had found such love, such happiness in such a chaotic world. "Soon, you'll have two more."

He almost laughed, watching Gohan yawn, replying, "I can hardly wait."

His grumbling stomach woke him up, a slight giggle showing he wasn't the only one. He sat up a little to find her eyes barely open, smiling at him. "Bring me back something too," she mumbled.

Realizing she'd be okay if he left, Gohan leaned over Aiko, giving her a short yet meaningful kiss. She smiled at him, those blue-green eyes slowly sliding shut as he rose, turning to go. He was mildly surprised to find Tien staring at her through the observation window. Gohan quietly opened the door, standing beside Tien, watching the triclops, 'Xanthan' as Raktho called him, stare at his mate.

Gohan turned his gaze to her, saying, "She never gave up. She always believed you'd come for them. She kept going after losing all of you on your advice alone. She's never lost faith in us. Kept rebuilding mine. She's the reason I'm still alive, she wouldn't let me die," he paused, catching Tien's head falling out of the corner of his eye.

"She lives her whole life by one rule, 'I have to make Papa proud of me'. Believe me, you'd be extremely proud of her," Gohan finished, leaving.

When he returned, Tien was gone.

Her healing concentrating in her hand brought her to that half-sleep state, someone drawing the curtains pulling her out. Zandre smiled at Bulma as she turned from the window, "Good morning."

"Oh sorry Zandre. You should still be asleep, your hand is still..." Bulma let it hang as Zandre raised her left hand to her face, noticing the wrist brace.

"It should be okay if I leave this on. The actual healing's done, it's just stiff and sore," she replied as Bulma wheeled her breakfast over, "So where is everyone, they take them back?"

Bulma gave her a bemused smile, "No it's become father-son day."

"Even Aiko?"

"Yes, they went to Kami's Lookout. That's got to be the weird one, considering he's got Piccolo's memories," Bulma mused, going back to the window, a concerned look crossing her face.

"He'll be alright, you'll see," Zandre stated, trying to quell Bulma's worry.

The older woman just smiled, turning away and leaving her alone with her meal and her own worries.

After breakfast, Zandre went to her quarters to shower and change. As she came out of the bathroom to brush her hair, she found her 'father' standing in the doorway. She quickly got started brushing, conscious of her 'father's' ever-watchful gaze. She had just finished the braid, about to go for the tie, when she stopped. He was right behind her, holding it out to her. She quickly put it on as she went to the window, watching her love amaze his 'father'.

"What's this?" she heard his gruff voice behind her.

She turned to find him sitting on the bed, her sketchpad in his hands. Her hand absently floated to her stomach, "These two. Or at least how I saw them in a dream I had when I was healing."

His head suddenly snapped up, a concerned look in his eyes, "A healing dream, tell me about it."

She stared at him in confusion, "It was their fourth birthday and we came to your time because they wanted to meet their grandparents. You were all meeting at Goku's for Gohan's set's third. I found out 'I' died after having them from some complications and being too weak to heal 'myself' because 'I'd' been healing everyone from battling something called Majin Buu. Why?"

He looked up at her, surprised, "You don't remember the other time, do you? You were four and you fell down the stairs. We got worried when you slept through all of your healing. When it was finished, you woke up screaming 'Papa No!' You told us about a dream you had that a tiger got within the walls and attacked us, killing me. Three days later one did, you started ordering people to do things and we got it out. You ran to me saying 'You didn't die Papa! You didn't die!'"

She slowly sat beside him, the memories resurfacing, "So if I dream when I'm healing, it'll come true."

He just nodded, handing her the pad.

"So... you'll tell her... if you..." she started to ask, stopping as he went to the window.

Minutes passed as they tried to figure out how to word their feelings, their worries.

"She really did love you. No one could ever take your place, for either of us," Zandre stated, breaking the silence.

He barely nodded, adding, "Gohan said you never gave up."

She chuckled slightly, "Tried running away twice. I even set it so I'd know the second you came to town."

She slowly rose, taking his left hand and leaning her head tentatively on his shoulder, "Even though I barely knew you, I'll always love you. You're last words run through my mind every time I doubt myself."

His right hand slowly went to her face, stroking her cheek as he repeated them, with more emotion than before, "I love you Zandre."

She closed her eyes, feeling a few tears run away, her voice choked with emotion, "I love you too Papa."

They stayed that way for a long time until his soft chuckle made her open her eyes. "Gohan's giving Goku a hard lesson."

Zandre looked out the window to find everyone returned, watching the Son men spar. She smiled fondly at the father of her children, "He's had much to re-learn, but adapting has only made him stronger, as a man and a warrior."

Tien turned to his 'daughter', trying to gauge her true feelings, "He means much to you."

"More than you know. Ever since we met, I knew we'd always be there for each other. Our lives are so similar, we've helped each other through so much. What else can I do but love him?" she said, pulling away and going outside, pulling him along.

They joined the group, finding Goku trying to get a punch through Gohan's defenses, both of them looking so serious. Aiko's little hand found her bad one again, holding as tight as he should as the Son men jumped apart, Gohan laughing at his father. "Surprised?" he asked between chuckles.

Goku stood tall, aware their momentum was gone and replied, "More like amazed. You've completely adjusted, probably even improved in how many months?"

"About seven," he replied solemnly as they approached each other.

Goku's hand went to Gohan's left shoulder, giving a gentle squeeze, "It's just made me more proud of you, if that's possible," he said, pulling him into a hug.

"I hope you didn't get hurt too bad, because I'm not healing you," Zandre called, trying to lighten the mood.

"Me neither!" Aiko added, causing everyone to laugh as the 'father' and 'son' pulled apart.

Gohan went over to her, taking her left hand in his, "Zandre if it's still... you should be..." got stopped by her fingers pressing to his lips.

"If it was that bad, I still would be."

Aiko tugged on Gohan's pant leg, "It's healed, it's just weak and stiff. Don't you trust her?"

"Of course I do, I worry because I love her," Gohan replied, his eyes locked on hers.

Zandre just smiled at him as she picked up Aiko, holding him on her right, catching a strange glance from Piccolo. A feeling of loss overcame her as the whole group feel silent, the eminent hanging over them. Seeing Gohan take her hand in his brought up the confusion of last night, "So how did you do that?" Bulma asked, trying to postpone the good-byes.

Zandre turned her gaze to her hand, "He had me in a shielded cell, and I ran through, trying to absorb some of the energy. But getting out, I fell down a flight of stairs and that's how I cracked my leg. When I figured the way out, some of those droids had just passed through a locked door. I put my hand out, expecting it to reopen. It did, after it crushed my hand. Everything else happened cause I'd gotten zapped by Raktho," she replied as Gohan pulled her close.

There was a moment of silence as everyone realized what she went through yesterday, broken by Zandre's attempt to laugh it off, "So which one of you's taking them back?"

Trunks and Gohan turned to each other, something unspoken passing between them before Trunks responded, "I will." As everyone headed to the garage the time machine was in.

They all stop as they approached the machine, the earlier uneasiness returning. Goku decided to break it. He approached Gohan and Zandre, smiling, "Just remember your love and mine for you and these two," he placed a hand on her stomach, and any others will grow happy and strong," he finished, hugging Zandre and Aiko.

He turned to his 'son' again, "Take care of him Zandre."

"I will Goku-san, I will," she replied as 'father' and 'son' hugged one last time.

As Goku stepped back, Tien stepped up. 'Father' and 'daughter' stared into each other's eyes, suddenly hugging fiercely, both saying, "Remember." When they pulled apart, Tien turned to Gohan, smiling, "I didn't expect this, but I know you'll love and protect her and them," Tien replied, his hand going to her stomach.

"With more than I've got, Tien-san," Gohan replied, taking her hand again.

Surprisingly Piccolo approached Zandre, who was still holding Aiko. Not a word passed between them until Aiko broke the silence, "He wants to thank you."

She turned to Aiko, "We should be thanking him Aiko, after all, he's the one that left you with me," she then turned to Piccolo, catching a genuine smile of appreciation and happiness on his face, "But you're welcome anyway," she replied.

Aiko then suddenly jumped out of her arms, wrapping his around Piccolo's neck saying, "Thanks Papa."

Piccolo, to the surprise of everyone, returned the hug.

As Piccolo placed his 'son' down beside Zandre, she noticed Trunks had the machine ready to go, Vegeta already getting inside. She turned to find Goku, Piccolo, and Gohan in their own silent form of good-bye. A hand on her shoulder caused her to turn into her 'father's' hug one last time, almost afraid to let go.

"Good-bye my dear one," he choked out, using her almost forgotten pet name. He slowly pulled back, showing her the tears in his eyes. "Raise your dear ones with love."

"I will Papa, I will," she replied as he wiped her tears, leaning in to kiss her forehead, "Good-bye Papa-san."

They pulled apart and never lost eye contact until he lowered himself into the machine. The boom and flash of light occurred and the fathers were back where they should be. Gohan joined Bulma and beaconed Aiko to join them. As the little Namek approached them he whispered, "She's crying."

"I know little brother, I know," he replied taking Aiko's hand.

Bulma looked like she was about to go to Zandre, when Aiko took her hand, stopping her, "Don't Bulma-san," he stated.

She turned to Gohan, seeing concern and acceptance cross his face, "But why?"

He turned back to Zandre, "She finally got to say good-bye," he replied.


	15. Is That What You Want

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy

Pt. 15 Is That What You Want

_Authors Note: This is newly editted for a reason... i just moved mid-January and in packing & unpacking i started going through things - ended up re-reading this and the DBZ manga i've got - and so the ideas for working Zandre into canon started coming back. i just don't know if i should..._

**(Tien's p.o.v.) **

We all stood there; watching this Trunks, the older one from the other time, climb into the time machine. He stopped and, leaning in and grabbing something, jumped down and came back over. He stopped in front of me, holding some photos, "I almost forgot, they wanted you guys to have these. But there's only three."

I slowly took them as everyone crowded around us. I turned the photos around to find them there, smiling. Gohan stood there, holding a black haired little girl that looked so much like... She was there too, standing in front and a little to the left, a little boy in her arms, so much like Gohan only a small part of the front of his hair was black, the rest was her green. The little Namek was hovering behind Gohan, peeking over his left shoulder.

I absently handed the other two off, still staring at it as I heard Bulma say, "Oh they're adorable! How old are they?"

"That's an old picture, they're two there. They're three now and anxious for their little sister," he replied casually, watching me as my heart jumped into my throat.

"What do you mean?" I forced out.

"Amaya could be there when I get back. That's why they didn't come. Aiko's been fulfilling his part as big brother. He's keeping Taka and Nozomi out of their hair," he paused, laughing to himself, "Those two are a handful."

I turned back to the picture, that flash and boom telling he left. I looked up as the first ki left, watching Piccolo leave. "Hey," Yamcha called, pointing to me and Gohan.

Piccolo took one of them.

Slowly everyone left, our Trunks needing to be fed, Vegeta following Bulma after she was out of sight. Yamcha just shot off, still amazed or confused about them. I took one last look at the picture before I turned to him.

He had walked away a bit, absorbed in the picture's tale and wondering what it meant to him. _'It doesn't mean anything now, unless I go get her. So, someone feels as confused as I do. And he doesn't have his father to talk this over with anymore.'_

I slowly approached, finding him staring at the picture, at her. It suddenly reminded me of that one's dream. I placed a caring hand on his shoulder, and he turned, barely smiling. "So...?" I whispered, not sure if I could say it all, let alone do it.

He turned back to the photo in his hand, his other barely touching her hair, "I'm not sure," he paused, smiling back at her, "It would be nice to... have a friend right now," he finished, choking on his tears.

I gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze before I let go and he took off. I watched him disappear, my vision blurring from the unshed tears. "Yeah it would."


	16. Dreamed You Into Life

Not Much Between Despair And Ecstasy

Pt. 16 Dreamed You Into Life 

Yet Another Note: This is another of those 'I know everyone's going to be asking about so I should just write' parts. This one is supposed to be hopping back and forth between timelines. Yes, I would like to take Zandre into the normal line, but since I'm not sure what I'd leave alone and what I'd re-write yet, that will just have to wait 'til I make up my mind or if someone is willing to co-write.

* * *

Gohan moved a dampened green lock that was a little too close to her eye away, waking her up. "Gohan let her sleep. She's exhausted and should be healing so leave her alone," Bulma reprimanded him from across the room.

"I know Bulma, I just can't help it," he replied, about to stroke her cheek.

A hand stopped his; he turned to the source to find Bulma behind him, a small bundle in her arms. "Why don't you caress your son for a while?" she said, smiling as she tried to hand him to his father, giggling as she unwrapped his tail from her wrist. "Forgot about that."

Gohan held his son in his right arm, his 'left' manifesting and unwrapping the blanket. A full head of hair popped out, all of it green but a small patch in front, his bangs if it would ever lay flat, was black. Taka snuggled closer to his father, content to stay asleep until his father stroked his cheek with his 'hand'. Those little eyes opened and tiny hands grabbed that manifested power, squeezing. "Just as strong as his father," Gohan said, smiling down on his son.

Zandre smiled at them, "Try having that sensation wake you up and we'll see how you feel," she joked, barely awake.

Bulma turned, bringing another bundle, "Since you're awake, I guess I can ask you guys. What about their tails?"

"What's to ask, we're leaving them. There's no moon so there's nothing to worry about," Zandre replied as she slowly sat up, Bulma handing Nozomi to her.

"That and since they're her children, we have no idea if the tail would just come right back," Gohan added, sitting on the edge of the bed, watching Zandre feed their daughter.

Bulma contemplated their argument as she went back to the changing table. She picked up something and came back, "You've got a point there," she said, holding out the umbilical cords.

Zandre smiled as she turned to her daughter, who finished her breakfast, "So you two heal like I do," she said as she put her to her shoulder, patting gently.

"You were right little one. Thank you for waking me," a soft grizzly whisper made them turn to the door. Ox-King was standing there in his pajamas, Aiko standing on his outstretched hand.

"Come on in and meet them," Zandre said as Taka started getting fussy.

"I think it's his turn," Gohan said, about to hand him over, stopping as Zandre wrapped Nozomi in her blanket. She held her out, about to place her in Gohan's 'left arm'. She smiled as the lines of energy became stronger, yet softer at the same time. She sat back slowly as she realized their daughter was safe in her daddy's arm.

Gohan looked down at the two little beings he was holding, an overwhelming pride coursing through him. His children were here. His world was, and as long as he lived, would always be safe and free. He was holding his children. Holding them. It felt so wonderful.

His son's appetite decided to ruin the moment. Gohan turned to her, seeing as much pride and joy on her face as she giggled and took their son, placing him to her breast. Gohan smiled at the sight, hoping somewhere deep down it would happen many more times. He turned his attention to his daughter. She sighed in her sleep and snuggled closer. "My little hope," he whispered to her, gently stroking her chin. Those little eyes slowly opened and he smiled at that familiar gaze. "Her mother's eyes."

Zandre just smiled at them as she put Taka to her shoulder, a yawn escaping. Gohan smiled, trying to hide the concern in his eyes. She nodded as she placed their son back in his father's arms. He slowly stood, a baby on each arm and she slowly closed her eyes, whispering, "I love you, all three of you."

* * *

"... all three of you," she mumbled as she slowly woke up. She was in the hospital, Gohan sleeping at her side, his left hand loosely holding hers.

She slowly looked around the room. Goku, ChiChi and Goten were curled up in chairs behind Gohan. Next to them Bulma was asleep with Trunks head in her lap. Vegeta slept next to her, Bra asleep at his shoulder. On the other side of the door sat two bassinettes. At the window sat her father, Papa was sound asleep, Chaotzu leaning against him.

She slowly slipped out of the bed, quietly walking to the bassinettes. The babies looked like their parents had, only she had the tail. She slowly, gently stroked their cheeks, making sure not to wake them.

A strong pair of arms wrapped around her, his voice whispered in her ear, "They're almost as beautiful as their mother."

She turned in his arms, hugging him close to her. He jumped a little, them relaxed into the hug, holding her just as close. "I almost forgot I could have lost you. We have to thank your father for warning us," he said softly, kissing her hair.

"I had one, just now," she replied, pulling back to look him in the eye, "I saw them in the other line, right after they were born."

"Were they like the picture? Did they look like that?" he asked, curious.

"Yes, exactly," she yawned, leaning on him a little, "Oh and I saw you... uh, him holding both, his ki manifesting his left arm. It was so touching," she said, another yawn escaping.

Gohan smiled at his wife as he led her to the bed. "You can tell me all the details later. You're not completely healed, are you?" he asked as he sat her down on the bed.

She blushed, "No, but I had to see them," Zandre replied as she lay down, feeling the sleep overpower her.

He covered her up and kissed her deeply, "And you did. Now finish healing love."

"I love you too," she mumbled as the sleep took over.

* * *

She woke up at home in her own bed. She was about to go back to sleep until a noise out of the twin's room made her jump. As she got up, she realized who it was, but still she headed there, stopping in the doorway.

He was standing at the foot of the cribs, just watching them sleep. Suddenly realizing he'd been caught, he turned to her, smiling. She slowly joined him, wrapping her arms around his waist, "It's nice to be home."

"I'm sorry if I woke you, it's just..." he tried to explain.

She kissed him, stopping him, "I know what you mean."

She turned back to their children, feeling him move across the room. "How in the...?" made her turn to him.

"What is it Gohan?" she asked, joining him in front of the dresser. There sat a hinged picture frame. The left one held the family photo, all four and Aiko. On the right was a picture of the four at the hospital, not long after they were born. She slowly picked it up, just now seeing the note sitting under it:

_From their Grandpas, with love._

She spun around and hugged him, so full of joy.

"Zandre?!?" Gohan exclaimed, surprised until he read the note, "I know, I know," he replied, hugging her just as fiercely.


End file.
